Guest's 'inexcusable' wedding outfit unleashes massive online tiff: 'Wildly inappropriate'

"I think it’s excessive. Am I overreacting?"

A bride shared photos of the dress her aunt wore to her wedding, sparking debate online. Photo: Facebook
A bride shared photos of the dress her aunt wore to her wedding, sparking debate online. Photo: Facebook

Every bride dreams of the perfect wedding — but when it comes to that special day, the definition of perfect wildly differs depending on the couple’s personal taste. A popular Facebook page dedicated to wedding shaming often jests at various ‘bridezillas’ and their outrageous list of requirements for guests.

From strict dress codes to guidelines on behaviour and even hairstyles, it’s safe to say that attending what is supposed to be a day of love and celebration can quickly feel like a chore. However, there are still some universal rules that are typically expected to be followed - unless specifically stated otherwise.

One of those rules for wedding guests (that has been around for decades and is still commonly debated) is wearing white or any colour or pattern close to it. The topic was reignited online after a bride shared photos of a guest’s outfit at her recent wedding, eliciting mixed opinions as to whether she was overreacting to the controversial fashion choice, or if it was, in fact, tacky.

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In the photos shared on Facebook, the guest is seen wearing a midi, long-sleeve nude dress with a white patterned overlay and white kitten heels.

“My aunt wore this dress to my wedding, raising questions about whether it’s okay for a guest to wear this much white,” the bride wrote. “I think it’s excessive, even the heels appear bridal. Am I overreacting?”

Now this might seem like a no-brainer, right? Avoiding white attire is wedding etiquette as old as time — after all, no one wants to pull the focus away from the bride on her special day. But the online discussion surrounding the supposed faux pax suggested that the rule was not as cut and dry as one might think.

One person pointed out that the reasoning behind the common wedding protocol (whether explicit or unspoken) is “that it would be rude if the guest were also to look or be mistaken for the bride”.

Is it ever okay to wear white to a wedding? Photo: Getty
Is it ever okay to wear white to a wedding? Photo: Getty

“So that dress simply doesn’t qualify,” they said in reference to the length and style of the frock.

“I really don’t care what the reasoning is,” another countered. “Don’t wear white in general. Anything that could be worn by the bride to a rehearsal dinner, shower, or any celebration is a dress that should be avoided.”

But one person pushed back on that comment with the opinion that this attitude towards wedding guest attire was too limiting.

“Anything that could be worn by the bride,” they wrote. “Jeez. That pretty much leaves jeans, no?”

“For me personally, not wearing white is more about that being the bride’s colour and the bride standing out more if she’s the only one wearing that colour,” another commenter offered. “Many, many people are on the same page about not wanting guests in white at all.”

“The only saving grace is that it's not a full-length dress,” someone else wrote. “But it’s still not really cool.”

Others also noted that the same etiquette would apply should the bride have chosen a non-traditional wedding dress colour, such as green or red.

“Guests should not be aiming for anything in that colour that looks like a bridal dress,” one commenter explained.

However there were several comments defending the aunt’s choice of clothing, from opinions that it “looks nothing like a bridal style” to those stating that they wished the “whole bridal white thing would just go out of style”.

Wearing white to a wedding is an unspoken faux pas. Photo: Getty
Wearing white to a wedding is an unspoken faux pas. Photo: Getty

“I don’t think anyone’s mistaking her for the bride,” one person quipped.

“I don’t think it looks like a wedding dress at all,” another agreed.

“My personal opinion is it’s mostly beige with a white design and it’s not bridal-looking, I’d be fine with it,” a third person offered.

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Despite these opinions, there was still an overwhelming agreement that the bride’s aunt, in this case, was out of line, with some describing the decision to wear white as “wildly inappropriate”, “attention seeking” and “inexcusable”.

As far as weddings go, it’s probably better to be safe than sorry and avoid any kind of white in your outfit as a guest — however you may feel about the rule. After all, there are plenty of other colours out there!

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