Aussie apologises for 'offensive' fairy bread: 'Lapse in judgement'
Let this be a warning to anyone planning to make the beloved party treat.
A proud man who decided to make himself some fairy bread and post a picture online ended up apologising for making the "worst fairy bread" some Aussies have ever seen.
The contentious version of fairy bread was roasted by Reddit users who claimed the man's concoction was just "bread with sprinkles" because of his failure to use hundreds and thousands, for starters.
'Heinous fairy bread abuse'
"This is not fairy bread. Might wanna find a mirror and take a good look at yourself and where you are heading in life, as this is not really the ideal path," a horrified member responded to the post. Another seconded: "This is the worst looking fairy bread I have ever seen. I was offended by it. I'm still a bit offended by it."
"Look, I have straight up sugar on buttered bread, so I'm not going to judge the sprinkles, but for the love of God, butter your bread to the crust," pleaded someone else. "Did you cut the bread before eating it? If so, did you cut it into triangles? Or did you commit further heinous fairy bread abuse?"
'I don't expect to be forgiven'
Realising his mistakes, the original poster quickly issued an apology expressing his regret. "I made a severe and continuous lapse in my judgement, and I don't expect to be forgiven. I'm simply here to apologise," the man acknowledged.
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"What I came across in the pantry today was obviously unplanned. None of us knew how to react or how to feel. I should have never posted this picture. I should have put the camera down and stopped taking the picture. There's a lot of things I should have done differently but I didn't. And for that, from the bottom of my heart, I am sorry."
"I want to apologise to the internet. I want to apologise to anyone who has seen this picture. I want to apologise to anyone who has been affected or touched by this picture that I posted today. Please forgive me," he continued, but added: "It was still yummy asf tho."
'First step to healing'
The apology appeared to have sat well with members of the community, who continued to joke about the man's version of the Aussie classic. "I'm glad you know what you did wrong. Acceptance is the first step to healing my friend," someone replied as other Redditors acknowledged the OP's sense of humour.
"Thank you for your apology. It was thoroughly warranted. You are still not forgiven, and may yet lose your citizenship (and rightly so), but your effort to make amends is appreciated," a second user wrote. "Now please, for the love of all that is holy, buy some hundreds and thousands and spread your margarine TO THE GODDAM EDGES."
'Now I've done it properly'
In a follow-up post, the author of the original post shared a new pic, proving that he'd taken the advice he'd received to heart. "Ok guys I apologised and now I've done it properly," he captioned the photo.
This time, fellow Aussies commended the man on his much-improved fairy bread making skills, however many still found fault with what he'd plated up. A number of people demanded he be exiled for not cutting the bread into triangles, while others noted the butter hadn't been spread all the way to two edges.
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"Also please remove those two stray sprinkles on the plate. Evidence of your past indiscretions," one concerned user requested. "This makes me suspicious that OP's apology is not genuine at all," someone else responded. "Oh sure, they put up a photo of proper fairy bread on the internet to make everyone think they've changed their ways, but have they really? Or are they still making those sprinkled abominations in secret? Why are the sprinkles out again? Hmm?"
The man confirmed he did cut the snack into triangles before eating, but it seems no matter how close he comes to achieving fairy bread perfection, he'll find it near-impossible to make everyone happy.
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