Ryan Sutter Recalls Trista Nearly Breaking Up with Him amid 'a Little Bit of a Rough Period': 'I Just Had to Wake Up'

Ryan Sutter is looking back at a difficult moment during his 21-year marriage to Trista Sutter.

During a joint appearance with the inaugural Bachelorette on the Feb. 3 episode of the Amy & T.J. podcast. the former reality TV star, 50, was asked to recall when the pair — who met on the ABC dating show in 2003 — was “closest” to breaking up.

“If it has been close, it's been just her breaking up with me probably years ago,” Ryan told hosts Amy Robach and T.J. Holmes. “But, I think I went through a little bit of a rough period of just trying to figure out kind of where I was in life, and I think that was difficult on her.”

Related: Trista Sutter Was Forced to 'Zip' Her Lips About Marriage Rumors While Filming Special Forces: 'You Just Sign Your Life Away'

Despite the challenging time, Ryan insisted, “I don't think there's ever been a time where our love for each other has wavered.”

“But at that point … I was a little more selfish than she wanted to have someone be if she was gonna spend the rest of her life with them,” he explained. “So, those are probably our hardest conversations and…I just had to wake up and grow up a little bit and I feel like I did. I mean we're still here, but that's probably the closest.”

“And I don't know that we were that close, but, definitely, I think there are some thoughts of, like, on her end, is this who I wanna be with forever?” he continued. “And thank god, she decided it was.”

Related: Bachelorette Alum Trista Sutter Reveals Which Reality Shows She Would Do After Special Forces (Exclusive)

Trista also recalled a piece of relationship advice she received when she was the Bachelorette two decades ago, sharing, “Choose someone that you can't live without. Not someone that you can live with, but someone you can't live without.”

“That was definitely something that played into my decision because I didn't want to live without Ryan,” she said. “I felt like my life would not be as happy without him.”

She added that it’s important for couples to learn to forgive, communicate and laugh together.

“If they're not a good kisser, kick them to the curb,” she said.

Related: How Trista and Ryan Sutter Are Celebrating Their 21st Wedding Anniversary After 'Crazy Busy' Year (Exclusive)

Last year, Ryan sparked speculation about the pair’s relationship when he posted cryptic posts about her being gone while unbeknownst to the public, she was filming Special Forces: World’s Toughest Test.

Trista later told PEOPLE that when the rumors began online, she thought “the world had lost its mind.”

“Well, immediately I saw Ryan's post and I think it's incredibly sweet because if you have the perspective that I was filming the show when you read his post, then you know they're not cryptic,” she recalled. “He's like, ‘I wish I was with you. I wish I could be with you. I wish I could help you through this. You need to find yourself,' and that kind of thing.”

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“And I was trying to reconnect with me, who I am at my core, and searching for something in a way. And so if you look back on his posts, it makes total sense,” she continued. “But I also was very humbled by it, that people actually still care because usually we post things and it doesn't go viral.”

“But this clearly went viral and it kind of filled my heart, made my heart happy that there are people out there that still care about us,” she concluded.

Read the original article on People