Husband donates sperm to his friend without telling his wife

A husband has been slammed for secretly providing sperm to his best friend — without telling his wife.

The woman who received the sperm is now pregnant with twins, and asked Reddit for advice on her confusing dilemma.

Angry husband and wife arguing on a green couch. Both are wearing grey shirts and blue jeans.
The husband hid his sperm donation from his wife which made her extremely upset. Photo: Getty

“I am in a position where I felt stable enough to bring a child into the world on my own, so I decided to go through IVF,” she began.

“My best friend since high school found out about my plan, and offered to be the sperm donor.”

She went on to explain that she assumed he had checked with his wife before offering, and made it very clear that he wouldn’t have a parental role in the child’s life.

“I’d know his medical history and any risks. He was happy to agree to this and it never once occurred to me that he would offer this without running this by his wife first,” she added.


Everything blew up when she took the couple out for dinner to thank them, and it quickly became apparent the sperm donor's wife was completely in the dark.

“His wife was confused when I explained the reasons for the dinner, and angry, demanding to know why we kept this from her.

“I was just as shocked and asked my friend if he hadn’t told his wife.”

Unbelievably, he didn’t think it would matter since he wouldn’t be the father, but instead an “uncle figure”.

She continues, “His wife got even angrier at that part stating she isn’t comfortable with their son having siblings that aren’t really his siblings,” and she also wants her husband to “have a legal say over the girls.”

Young pregnant woman in a blue dress, standing by yellow curtains and window.
The woman hates the position she's found herself in now, and turned to Reddit for advice. Photo: Getty

This revelation shocked the woman, and while trying to stand her ground by saying she’s the only one who will have parental rights, the three of them got into an even bigger fight.

“His wife demanded to know why I wouldn’t tell her that her husband had offered this in the first place,” she wrote.

The majority of Reddit users were on the woman’s side, slamming the sperm donor.

“Your friend is the major asshole here. I understand the wife being upset about this, her husband definitely should’ve talked this over with her before offering to be a donor,” one commented.

“Christ, I cannot imagine if my husband just casually fathered someone else’s child without mentioning it to me,” another person commented.

Some people believed that the woman wasn’t completely blameless in the situation.

“[The woman] should have at minimum had a conversation with the wife to ensure this was something she was comfortable with prior to the IVF procedure,” one person remarked.

“I think she didn’t want to verify the wife knew because things were so convenient for her that digging into it may have led to the offer being rescinded,” another added.

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