Danny Cipriani reflects on the ‘gift’ ex Caroline Flack left behind: ‘I hadn’t really cried before’

Danny Cipriani has revealed that the late TV presenter Caroline Flack gave him “the gift” of fully expressing his emotions and feelings.

Cipriani, a retired rugby player, dated Flack until May 2019, and he said they were in regular contact and that he heard from her the day before she died by suicide on 15 February 2020 aged 40.

In a new interview, the former Gloucester rugby union reflected on his relationship with the former Love Island presenter, saying that the “gift she gave me was having to dive into my emotions in a way I hadn’t before”.

He continued: “I hadn’t really cried or felt visceral feelings before.”

Reflecting on the grief he experienced in the wake of Flack’s death, Cipriani said he was “devastated” and confided in his Gloucester rugby club teammates.

“I spoke to my teammates for an hour. I was crying. I stood up at the front and told everyone what I felt shameful about and all the things I was trying to hide because we all share our pain,” he told The Times.

The club used a premiership match against Sale Sharks to raise awareness of mental health issues, in response to the abuse that Cipriani received on social media following Flack’s death.

Cipriani said he has dealt with grief by “sitting with it and honouring it”.

“You can’t avoid grief,” he said. “When I was trying to run away from emotions or not feel certain things, they would come back up in a different way. So give yourself time to feel the discomfort and pain, and sit with it.

After Flack’s death, Cipriani shared an 18-minute-long in which he discussed their relationship and how he “felt safe” with her.

Cipriani mentioned his struggles with mental health and depression, saying: “I’m saying these things out loud so people understand it’s OK to be vulnerable and you can take it any way that you choose, and that is also OK.”

Flack’s death prompted a renewed debate around the effects of press intrusion in the lives of celebrities and the impact of negative coverage on their mental health.

The presenter had been the focus of several stories including the allegations that she assaulted her boyfriend Lewis Burton. She had stepped down from presenting the winter series of ITV’s Love Island and was due to appear in court the month after her death.

If you are experiencing feelings of distress, or are struggling to cope, you can speak to the Samaritans, in confidence, on 116 123 (UK and ROI), email jo@samaritans.org, or visit the Samaritans website to find details of your nearest branch.

If you are based in the USA, and you or someone you know needs mental health assistance right now, call or text 988, or visit 988lifeline.org to access online chat from the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline. This is a free, confidential crisis hotline that is available to everyone 24 hours a day, seven days a week. If you are in another country, you can go to www.befrienders.org to find a helpline near you