Yahoo Lifestyle Life Should Never Be Too Serious, So Here's 27 Of The Funniest Tweets From The Week To Keep You Chucklin'
Well, y'all, considering the fact that I'm SHIVERING at my desk right now (I'm stubborn and cheap and refuse to turn my heat on this early), I fear brat girl summer is behind us...
"Brat summer officially over, declares Charli XCX" https://t.co/CqVH370pUg pic.twitter.com/VoZu0GJz36
— John Rain 🥇 (@ItsJohnRain) September 3, 2024
Roger Wood/Picture Post/Hulton Archive/Getty Images / Via Twitter: @ItsJohnRain
I don't know what season we're entering now (Demure Girl Fall??? Worry Wart Autumn??? Stranger Than Fiction Fall??? Or simply just Please Help Me Get Through This Presidential Election Autumn???). Whatever it is, we'll need some laughs, so here are some funny tweets from the first week of September to kick us off:
1.
Do something that scares you every day.If you do that, then each day, little by little, you will be scared. Every day will be scary, and your life will be very scary. 💫
— Dave (@iridescentaudio) September 4, 2024
2.
Hi. It's your friends here at Hello Fresh. We're desperate. 200 meals for $2. We will put it away in your fridge. We will become your staff and run your household. We will do anything for your business. Anything. Just ask. We lose $20bn an hour but we are an essential service
— Ed Zitron (@edzitron) September 8, 2024
3.
apple photos will make an entire montage of the worst person you’ve ever met and add some jazz music on top of it, and then title it “The Good Days”
— Mal🕷️ (@nevermindbruhh) September 4, 2024
4.
I finally did it, I asked a man on the tube who was watching football out loud on his phone “got any headphones mate?” AND HE IMMEDIATELY APOLOGISED AND MUTED IT - I am the dragon I am the ball I am the z
— Natasha Hodgson (@NatashaHodgson) September 3, 2024
5.
omg that’s like their beyoncé https://t.co/6IxnTeQMxi
— z̵s̴a̶ ̸z̸s̶a̴ ̷g̸a̷b̴o̶r̴t̵i̷o̵n̴ (@zsazsagabortion) September 7, 2024
6.
i love my dog but this mf gotta pay rent pic.twitter.com/iW64rcEoHF
— dinosaur (@dinosaurs1969) September 8, 2024
7.
my anxiety is at an all time high because i keep getting texts that begin like ‘anna, we need to check in’ or ‘this is a difficult message to send’ and for a second i think it’s my boyfriend breaking up with me before i realize they’re all from tim walz
— Anna Krauthamer (@AnnaKrauthamer) September 8, 2024
8.
Not 183 year old tea!!! https://t.co/jfnKhyowCO
— Thicki Lake ♓️🪬 (@ShyThugg) September 5, 2024
9.
I have to tell a client that the ship carrying her countertops is being held up by pirates and it is too early for this right now
— saddy mayonnaise (@saddymayo) September 3, 2024
10.
an essential part of watching old movies is having your inflation calculator ready
— julia (@eathedocument) September 8, 2024
11.
Am I high or is this air conditioner unit stargazing with her legs out the window right now pic.twitter.com/ygWYeadoFy
— xtian (@AOWTOUDOUZAT) September 7, 2024
12.
My mum asking me who I’m going out with like it’s not the same 2 cunts
— Mo (@mohammed_chati1) September 2, 2024
13.
Ik my parents HATE to see me bringing common sense to a conversation
— a🇹🇹 (@annab1ake) September 7, 2024
14.
— DeviantPigg (@DefectivePigg) September 8, 2024
15.
I’ve lost years of my life to 2-factor authentication
— timuoxi cha le mei (@ch1cken_t3nder) September 6, 2024
16.
putting “reddit” at the end of every question i have on google cuz i will never trust an AI i need John from 13 years ago that has the same problem as me to solve it
— ˚ʚ 🐈⬛ ɞ˚ (@Cyb4rAnGeL) September 6, 2024
17.
Crossed the street to give the 3 tween girls their space as they took up the entire sidewalk to jump around in a prayer circle repeating “our moms WILL say yes to a sleepover TONIGHT!” ❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥
— eliza (@elizamclamb) September 4, 2024
18.
leonardo dicaprio just switched to bing https://t.co/f6wzP0lkBI
— Hurt CoPain (@SaeedDiCaprio) September 4, 2024
19.
Why can't I go to the website of the company Toyota and order a car. Why must I go to the local Honest Jim's Horseshit Emporium and Haberdashery and waste 3 hours of my time
— Political Science B.A. (@InternetHippo) September 5, 2024
20.
Told my 56-year-old coworker that I’m a bit anti-social and he said “yeah I noticed that about you, you don’t necessarily light up a room”
— M.E🍎 (@Emmys) September 5, 2024
21.
today in costco a woman straight up asked her husband for a divorce. and she wasn’t joking. being miserable in the costco together would be my last straw too
— dash • they/them (@thedigitaldash_) September 8, 2024
22.
4 year old has a new bit where he pretends to have a fatal scooter accident. it’s very funny but the other patrons of the farmer’s market seemed alarmed pic.twitter.com/MTBjbvRAzm
— pipperberry 🍉 (@pippercorn) September 8, 2024
23.
It’s awesome when people honk at you for not moving when you’re letting people cross. You’re right bro I should just annihilate this family of four
— Ⓜ️ert (@mertcentury) September 8, 2024
24.
— 𝓡𝓲𝓭𝓮𝓼 𝓣𝓱𝓪𝓽’𝓵𝓵 𝓑𝓮𝓪𝓽 𝓨𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓐𝓼𝓼 (@ass_beaters) September 8, 2024
25.
— The Notorious J.O.V. (@whotfisjovana) September 8, 2024
Disney Channel / Courtesy: Everett Collection / Via Twitter: @whotfisjovana
26.
Quiet please… Lemon Raspberry Loaf is sleeping pic.twitter.com/pqvfb57AkO
— John Donoghue (@JohnDonoghue64) September 8, 2024
27.
Tried to let one get on the escalator first and he said "No,don't worry about me,I'm in no rush. They can't go anywhere without me" https://t.co/IDAFQLlzFs
— Stolen Chanel (@Zoemkoena) September 7, 2024
Thanks for followin' along, and see you next week for more laughs! In the meantime, if you need more funny tweets to bide your time, here are our most recent roundups (and shoutout to the creators of these tweets — don't forget to shoot them a follow if you liked 'em!):
43 Funny Tweets From The Week To Keep You Laughing Your Way Into September
37 Hilarious Tweets That Will Have You FALLing In A Fit Of Laughter Into Fall (Sorry)
