'Sh*tty situation': Mystery pooer horrifies Sydney neighbours during lockdown

Penny Burfitt
Lifestyle & Entertainment Producer

A message from an irate neighbour has made waves online after a ‘mystery human pooer’ defecated on a private garage.

The sign was found on a house in Sydney’s Inner-West and shared to Reddit where it attracted a predictably horrified response from curious onlookers.

Photo: Reddit

Posted on Monday, the situation has unfolded under lockdown, adding an extra level of stress to an already unhygienic situation.

“Dear mystery human pooer,” the sign read.

“We have installed this fence and a camera to hand over to police. We understand that COVID-19 is tough on everyone, but please stop sh*tting on our garage.”

Scientists are unsure if coronavirus is spread through faeces as well as through saliva, though it’s probably not a great time to test the waters.

Making matters worse, it seems the mystery dumper was not acting from necessity, as the sign explained a pub carpark across the road was fitted with public toilets.

“Thank you for your cooperation,” the sign concluded, on a somewhat hopeful note.

Onlookers horrified at ‘sh*tty’ situation

The sign sparked a strong reaction from disgusted readers online.

Many wondered if the mystery person could be the same ‘poo jogger’ that ran riot on the streets of Sydney’s posh inner-city suburb of Paddington last year before being exposed by PR mogul Roxy Jacenko.

“Sydney mystery poo jogger is back?” one onlooker wondered.

“The sign implies we got a serial pooper there,” another observed.

“What a sh*tty situation to be in,” one wise-guy couldn’t help but point out.

Others were furious, sharing that they too had been battling the same situation, though they didn’t claim to be victim of the same person.

“People have no shame for f***s sake we are like 500m away from multiple pubs why do you have to do it out the front of my house!” one irate man wondered.

Others were desperate for updates, begging the person who shared the post to keep the online community updated on the crappy situation.

“We definitely need an update on this one,” one man wrote. “If the mystery pooper is uncovered, please share the details!”

It’s just another bizarre tale in a string of illicit bowel movements striking in major Aussie cities.

The trend, or public attention to it at the very least, first started when a mystery poo jogger struck Brisbane in 2018 and was eventually revealed to be a high-powered executive who was left disgraced and forced to resign.

Got a story tip or just want to get in touch? Email us at lifestyle.tips@verizonmedia.com.