Location-tracking apps are controversial but there's a surprising benefit

When my children were little I prided myself on not being a helicopter parent. I let them climb up the slide at the playground, I allowed them the freedom to explore the park, we even went to the supermarket without so much as a backpack leash. Considering my first were twins and I was out and about with two toddlers tugging me in different directions, I feel like I managed the anxiety pretty well.

I am decidedly less chill about their journey into high school. You see, said twin toddlers are now 12 year olds headed off to a new school, and I also have a third child who's still in her primary years. I realised all-too suddenly that the days of walking all three of them in the same direction and physically watching them enter the school gates were over. Now I needed to accompany my 9 year old, and let the 12 year olds make their own way to school. To be honest, the way I'd seen neighbourhood kids ride their bikes with a haphazard regard to their own safety, I didn't feel great about it.

But after the laissez-faire attitude I had towards parenting my children when they were little, I certainly didn't expect that I'd end up resorting to tracking them.

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However, ensuring the kids' safety while also fostering their independence was a top priority for me as they entered their tween years. We had the obvious logistical challenge of getting everyone to school safely, and I actually felt like the twins were ready for the next stage of independence, it's just that maybe I wasn't. I didn't want to sit there panicking all day about whether they'd even arrived at school.

I found unexpected solace in the Life360 app—a digital ally for families that offers a delicate balance between oversight and autonomy.

Friends with teens had sung its praises, but back then, my kids still held my hand crossing the road; I didn't need to track them, one out of the three of them still slept in my bed most nights! Fast forward to planning school commutes with one eye on my littlest and the other on the twins' riding off in the other direction into oncoming traffic, and Life360 was suddenly back on my radar.

What is Life360?

For the uninitiated, Life360 is the Swiss Army knife of family apps. Real-time location tracking, check-ins, messaging, emergency assistance—it's got it all. And for teens, there are even driver reports to keep tabs on those early solo drives, from texting behind the wheel to speeding.

As easy as it was to set the kids up on the app and watch them (literally) go on their merry way, I still felt uneasy about tracking my children, especially with controversial articles suggesting the app enables helicopter parenting to an unhealthy extreme.

Indeed, Psychologist Collett Smart emphasises the importance of using the app appropriately. "A sense of freedom and independence is such an important part of growing up - but it sometimes can be hard for parents to let go," she told Yahoo Lifestyle. Hard relate.

"Life360, when used well, can be a win-win for both parents and their tweens or young teens, especially if it is used as a tool to empower our children’s independence rather than restrict it."

Monitoring, not micromanaging

So in short, we should be allowing our kids to make decisions and learn from their experiences while having a safety net close at hand. For example, if you have an adventurous tween who wants to try a few things on their own for the first time, you might like to position giving them access to Life360 as a positive consequence of them earning more independence.

Let them try out new experiences like walking the dog alone, sleepovers (it's always good to know they’re still where you dropped them!), exploring new or unfamiliar places or taking public transport alone. Knowing you can still look out for them may also be reassuring to them as they learn to take small steps toward independence, on their own.

Another approach may be that you agree to only activate Life360 around certain “out of the ordinary” occasions, like a concert or party, when they’re going bike riding or walking alone or when they need drop-off or pick-ups.

Open conversations

Smart also suggests parents have open and honest conversations about privacy, trust and safety before implementing a location tracking app in the family, saying this is "absolutely vital, and extends beyond Life360 to every digital interaction for your child."

"You will need to sit down and discuss together why Life360 is being used," she elaborates. "It should never be uploaded secretly. Discuss the mutual benefits it brings, and establish mutual agreements about when and how the app will be used."

Smart also stresses children need to be involved in setting up family guidelines for Life360, like defining when tracking is appropriate and respecting each other's privacy.

Healthy uses for using the Life360 app

Smart suggests the following heathy uses for the app.

• Use the app to check if your children have arrived at or have left a venue, so you don’t have to keep calling them every hour to check-in. Life360 can be set up to send a place alert if required.

• If a tween becomes lost in an unfamiliar place, the app can show their exact location for pick up - and they can send an SOS alert if they feel unsafe.

• Children can keep track of their parents too. We can’t expect to see where our children are but not allow them to do the same. It also helps when a parent is late for pick-up - your child can jump on the app and see where you are in real time.

Will tracking your children do more harm than good?

Smart does warn against bubble wrapping our children, pointing out this is "not healthy for their growth and development so we shouldn’t overuse or overstep our privilege of using a tracking app."

She goes on to suggest looking for signs of increased tension or conflict surrounding privacy issues. For example, your child could begin expressing a lack of trust. This doesn’t mean you will necessarily change your position on everything, but an open, two-way conversation allows them to feel heard and understood. If children begin to show signs of anxiety or distress due to monitoring, it may be time for boundaries to be reassessed.

Striking a balance

Most children want greater independence and freedom as they get older, so agreeing to use Life360 is a fair and reasonable compromise in giving them more freedom during this transition to their teen years.

However, parents should also prioritise building trust with their children by respecting their privacy and autonomy across various scenarios while also emphasising the importance of safety.

"Set clear boundaries and regularly revisit them," suggests Smart. "This can help maintain a healthy balance between safety and independence as your child grows."

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Is it possible to use a location-tracking app as a tool for connection rather than surveillance? According to Smart, absolutely.

Lead by example, show healthy tech use, and reassure your child that being tracked reflects your commitment to their wellbeing. After all, it's about maintaining trust while ensuring safety as they navigate the journey to independence.

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