Yahoo Lifestyle I'm Snickering Alone In My Room At These 30 Funny Tweets From The Week
Welcome, y'all. It's October.
And October used to be cold pic.twitter.com/CtpDpwje2j
— Ariam #FreeTigray (@iambrattyb) October 6, 2024
Fox / Via Twitter: @iambrattyb
With 2024 now almost 80% complete, we've got no time to waste. Gather your end-of-year goals, reflect on your year thus far, or, more simply, review last week's funniest tweets because, well, every week in 2024 continues to surprise me. Let's get right into 'em:
1.
touring apartments is so funny bc sometimes you know the answer is no as soon as the door opens and you gotta pretend like you kinda interested as you see the rest of the place omg
— zae (@itszaeok) September 30, 2024
2.
“Are you fucking mad” is also up there https://t.co/LuHcPLjQMz
— DaBadGuy (@frekman17) September 30, 2024
3.
4.
i wish i could shazam a perfume
— jynx (@jynxbby) September 30, 2024
5.
Congrats on hitting your Q3 numbers. Here is an even bigger Q4 number that you will be fired if you don't hit, you fucking moron
— Work Retire Die (@WorkRetireDie) September 30, 2024
6.
having a therapist is so funny like this is my emotional support 26 year old white girl with a masters degree
— “CLASSY” FRED BLASSIE (@megantheevalium) October 1, 2024
7.
Best Halloween decoration so far. 😅 pic.twitter.com/lFIgAL9p9j
— Jon Christenson, STS 🦬 ☕️ (@Melanchthon61) October 1, 2024
8.
— ౨ৎ #boycottaftercare (@luvyourguts) October 1, 2024
9.
I love when I buy food and that food is enough for 2 foods. Look at me, saving money. Now I can afford a house.
— Nicole 🌜 (@nsealyyy) October 4, 2024
10.
Just paid rent. Now I have a place to starve in
— ✨ (@Angelicali0) October 1, 2024
11.
I would love the opportunity to learn!! https://t.co/jeNOy0goUz
— Sophia Benoit (@1followernodad) October 4, 2024
12.
just learned the only way out is through pic.twitter.com/5gdDRyvx6o
— callie actually (@myfriendcallie) September 30, 2024
@wisdems / Via tiktok.com
13.
People always make this joke but I think a crumbl brownie sundae with the panera charged lemonade would actually GENUINELY kill a victorian age child https://t.co/NadcZZHSFt
— Solar Flair (@SolarFlairYT) October 5, 2024
Crumbl Cookies / Via Twitter: @SolarFlairYT
14.
4 mins before my next zoom meeting. Time to make myself an iced coffee, let my dogs out, put on eyeliner, start a load of laundry, empty the dishwasher and straighten my hair
— christinita (@majordouzie) October 2, 2024
15.
I’m putting together a team pic.twitter.com/DLZfwgLFFV
— Evan 🏳️🌈🌴 (@EvanPerc_) October 7, 2024
16.
17.
this is how it feels to tie ur shoe in public pic.twitter.com/qirrWYNr6F
— katie 𐦍 (@kat1enotfound) October 6, 2024
18.
My seven-year-old asked for a dictionary this week. We went to the bookshop today to buy one. She walked home hugging it, pausing every so often to look up a word, grinning as though she had been given a book of spells, the key to wonders.
— Ann Morgan (@A_B_Morgan) October 4, 2024
19.
My 9 y/o daughter just said:“Someone needs to invent a phone that stays in the house that everyone can hear and answer.”Y’all….🫢🥲
— PhD Loading | Déjà Rollins (@DRollins_) October 4, 2024
20.
No silence hits like this silence https://t.co/FxYTG77X4g
— beep (@beepbat) October 4, 2024
21.
Having too much wine and replying “gorg!!!” to my former coworkers story of flowers in a vase. It doesn’t get much better than this
— mike (@mikeofficial) October 5, 2024
22.
why’s asking someone if they want to hang out sooooo embarrassing 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 like pleaaase be my friend…… pleaas invite me …:.. please like me 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 i am twenty years old . shoot me in the head
— bob dylan (@_cherguevara) October 4, 2024
23.
millennials had years of computer classes where it was drilled into us “THE INTERNET IS FOREVER” and “DON’T OPEN SPAM EMAILS” and “CITE YOUR SOURCES” and then boomers were given internet access like tossing keys to a drunk and telling them to have fun.
— ally (@missmayn) October 4, 2024
24.
Entertained some out of town guests last night. At dinner they told us they refused to take the subway because it was too dangerous. My 9 year old said "What? You mean like if you ride on top?"
— David Hill (@davehill77) October 5, 2024
25.
3 friends is enough. 1 for the movie theater, 1 for drinks & apps, 1 for texting concerning mental health information
— Meg (@megannn_lynne) October 5, 2024
26.
no i do not want to download the app; CAN I JUST DO WHAT I NEED TO DO VIA THE WEB BROWSER MY GOD.
— Jared C. (@jayctigerfan) October 4, 2024
27.
The 2 fetus deletus babies in the reincarnation line https://t.co/RWPqndFSGR pic.twitter.com/wPUdf2P5xA
— Filtho Bangz (@NMJMRedux) October 4, 2024
28.
i feel so sorry for people with boyfriends like imagine having an awful day, you get home and there’s a man in your bed
— annie (@alltooannie) October 5, 2024
29.
Was dancing with a lad last night, and his mates dragged him away for the last train home... he said "my names Maff I'm from Kettering, find me"... imagine if life were that easy 😅
— Ashley. (@ashleyrich) October 6, 2024
30.
Woman on the mom forum wants to start a weekly play date club (good idea!) and another woman chimed in:“Is it so you can steal information about women’s husbands so you can cheat with them, like how you cheated with mine?”And now my Sunday just got MUCH more interesting! pic.twitter.com/v8zugFo4Ej
— Victoria Thompson, M.S. 💻 🥐 🏳️🌈 (@VictoriaTheTech) October 6, 2024
Twitter: @VictoriaTheTech / Via tenor.com
For more funny tweets, check out our previous roundups (and don't forget to shoot these creators a follow):
27 Hilarious Tweets From The Week Because Life Is Meant To Be Laughed At
