Yahoo Lifestyle Woman Refuses to Let Brother's Fiancée Wear Her Late Mom's Wedding Dress: 'Saving for My Special Day'
“Our family is now divided, with some saying I’m in the right and others saying I should let it go for the sake of family harmony," the woman wrote on Reddit
Getty
A stock image of an angry brideA woman is wondering if she is in the right after refusing to let her brother's fiancée wear her late mother’s wedding dress, which she has been saving for her own special day, per her mom's wishes.
The 32-year-old woman sought advice in the “Am I the A------” subreddit after her soon-to-be sister-in-law called her refusal “selfish,” and her brother accused her of “ruining their wedding.”
In a post shared Sept. 21, the Redditor laid out the entire situation, explaining that her mom died four years ago.
“It was devastating, and I inherited a lot of her things, including her wedding dress,” she wrote. “My mom and I were incredibly close, and she always talked about how much she wanted me to wear her dress when I got married. I’m not married yet, but I’ve been saving the dress for my special day.”
Her younger brother, 29, who is tying the knot next year, and his fiancée, 28, recently asked if she could wear his late mom’s gown, a gesture the Redditor called “sweet” but refused because of both her — and her late mom’s — desire for her to wear it herself.
While asking to wear the gown, her brother’s fiancée “said it would mean a lot to her because she never got to meet my mom, and she wants to feel connected to her on the big day,” the Redditor wrote.
“I understand that it’s a sweet gesture, but I don’t feel comfortable with her wearing something that’s so sentimental to me, especially since my mom always wanted me to wear it,” she added.
Getty
A stock image of a wedding dressAnd when the Redditor explained why she refused, she was met with vitriol from both of the fiancée and her brother.
“When I told her I wasn’t okay with it, she got upset and said I was being selfish,” she wrote. “Now my brother is upset with me too, saying it’s ‘just a dress’ and that I’m ruining their wedding over something that’s not a big deal.”
She tried to find a middle ground, but her brother’s fiancée wanted all or nothing.
“I offered to help her find a similar dress or even incorporate a piece of my mom’s dress into her own gown, but she refused,” she wrote. “Our family is now divided, with some saying I’m in the right and others saying I should let it go for the sake of family harmony."
Never miss a story — sign up for PEOPLE's free daily newsletter to stay up-to-date on the best of what PEOPLE has to offer, from celebrity news to compelling human interest stories.
In the top comments responding to the original poster, other users agreed that the woman was not wrong for her refusal, pointing out the hypocrisy shown by her brother and his fiancée — and even offering alternative ways to help the latter “feel connected” to her late mother-in-law.
“If it were 'just a dress' like your brother says, your future SIL wouldn't make such a big deal out of your refusal,” the top comment reads. “This is your dress to wear some day - or not. But it is your special connection. Not hers.”
Echoing this sentiment, another read, “It's funny how, when someone doesn't get what they want, suddenly you're the one being selfish.”
Another user, meanwhile, validated the original poster, writing, “If it was ‘just a dress’ then it shouldn't have the power to ruin their wedding. To you, it isn't ‘just a dress.’ ”
The same user also pointed out that if the poster’s future sister-in-law “wants to feel close” to her late mother-in-law, “there are other options" — options that "don't require your late mother's wedding dress which may well need to be adjusted if your future SIL were to wear it."
For more People news, make sure to sign up for our newsletter!
Read the original article on People.
