Yahoo Lifestyle TikToker with Rare Cancer Holds Funeral for Her Amputated Arm: 'It Made the Ultimate Sacrifice on My Behalf'
Eldiara Doucette surprised the mortician when she asked to see her once-dominant hand one last time
Eldiara Doucette
Eldiara Doucette.Her stage 3 cancer might have taken her arm, but Eldiara Doucette is saying goodbye on her own terms.
Since her diagnosis at 19 years old, the social media star has documented her journey with synovial sarcoma, a rare form of soft tissue cancer that affects only 1,000 people per year. Her illness has returned three times over the years, and this past October, now-22-year-old Doucette underwent an above-elbow amputation of her dominant arm.
On Wednesday, Jan. 15, Doucette — who posts online as "Bionic Barbie" — decided to have a "funeral" for her amputated limb, as she shared on her Instagram and TikTok accounts. Before the event, she told her followers how she invited a few family members, her boyfriend and some friends "with more morbid interests" to say goodbye to her forearm and fingers one last time.
Eldiara Doucette
Eldiara Doucette after her amputation.Her videos and photos from the day show the viral content creator in all black, wearing a veil and kneeling beside her arm, which was embalmed and laid out in a bed. Her disembodied fingernails were painted black to match the sleeve-like pocket wrapped around the severed end.
"What started as a joke - holding a service for my amputated arm - ended up being a beautifully cathartic experience," Doucette captioned a carousel of Instagram photos from the day of. She continued to reminisce about her life spent attached to the body part.
"I’ve held many hands, felt the skin of loved ones, picked up spiders to take outside, saved worms off of the sidewalk, wiped away tears, pet dogs and picked many dandelions. I’ve played piano, guitar, ukulele, an act that I’ll never again get to experience," she recalled, adding, "I always joke that my arm tried to kill me, but after looking at it on the table, seeing the scars it collected over the years, I realized it too was just a victim of this disease, and it made the ultimate sacrifice on my behalf."
Doucette went on to note how much cancer had taken from her and how the "funeral" helped her process her complicated feelings about losing her arm.
As she explained in a video ahead of the viewing, she originally intended to simply send her amputated arm to be eaten by beetles, with the bones intended to be removed and rearticulated. But because Doucette has a fondness for "morbid stuff," she asked the mortuary owner in possession of her arm if she could see it once last time.
Though he was initially "taken aback" by the unconventional request, Doucette said he came around to the idea and was keen to help her see it off. He treated the arm "as he would any other deceased body," she shared. The mortician added makeup to make it more presentable and ensured that her nails were still painted since sometimes the chemicals used in such undertakings can strip off polish.
In her pre-funeral reflections, Doucette — who recently wrote an essay for PEOPLE about practicing "radical acceptance" amid cancer treatment — pondered how she might experience the viewing.
Eldiara Doucette
Eldiara Doucette."I have very mixed feelings about what this is going to be like," she told the camera a day prior. "On one hand, this is hilarious. There's something so comedic about having a funeral for a body part that is not connected to anyone anymore."
She also anticipated that reuniting with her arm may be a more emotional experience. She wasn't in a proper state of mind to remember the last time she saw her since-removed body part since she was preparing for the operation.
"[It] feels like there's going to be a lot of closure in being able to see it one last time before it's gone forever. I have a feeling that I'm going to shed a few tears, and I also have a feeling that me and my loved ones are going to get a huge kick out of this," she said.
Read the original article on People
