Literally Just 99 Very, Very, Very Funny Tweets From This Past Summer

Could really go for one of these bad boys right now. Only if it comes with the wooden spoon, though. The wood is half the flavor. pic.twitter.com/2c71tDAi1D

— Shelby Novak (@shelbybnovak) June 7, 2024

Saw my first Cybertruck in the wild pic.twitter.com/p9JgkhZ1Lx

— Liam Nissan™ (@theliamnissan) June 5, 2024

mmm rantch 😋 pic.twitter.com/fNnxEs9p3j

— sho hoe🐀 (@ogshoshi) June 2, 2024

Well this Peacock graphic for Pride is…certainly a choice pic.twitter.com/0GSpp4MT3E

— Adam Feldman (@FeldmanAdam) June 2, 2024

Good on you, kiddo. Keep going. pic.twitter.com/6yrEDRYO3b

— Kristin Wilson (@kristin__wilson) June 3, 2024

when i text “interesting” this how i be looking pic.twitter.com/gPVrzFazsl

— jay ✰ (@jayythewave) June 3, 2024

Googled “Why am I ashamed to desire anything?” and then remembered I was raised Catholic and closed the tab

— JULIA (@S0UND0FMETAL) June 5, 2024

Really can’t see the fucking screen mate https://t.co/FShAzT5UAj

— pry0cc (@pry0cc) June 8, 2024

over 30 and slept the wrong way pic.twitter.com/Bp9QVaXVUz

— Jordan (@itsjordanapps) June 8, 2024

"lgbt" stands for "lets go by train" because queer people LOVE public transit

— dalton 🥥🌴 (@indaltonwetrvst) June 8, 2024

getting our biggest booth ready https://t.co/AjlIp6WJIt

— Chili's Grill & Bar (@Chilis) June 10, 2024

I hate Apps that shut off your music when u open them like how fu*king important do you think you are

— 𝖘𝖆𝖚𝖈𝖊 🎭 . (@greedobaby) June 10, 2024

pride month update: wyoming has fallen pic.twitter.com/g497irDZxv

— Andrew Lawrence (@ndrew_lawrence) June 10, 2024

Went to buy 4 highlighters but 15 was cheaper so now I’m sitting here like I’m highlighter Monet or something pic.twitter.com/92aM2LcAZo

— Patrick Allies (@PatrickAllies) June 10, 2024

🚨 they gentrified Cookie Crisp 🚨 pic.twitter.com/YDKCcVEq1s

— Raft ⚠️(they/them)⚠️ (@caitraft) June 12, 2024

Bigfoot is real and he mentioned me on Facebook pic.twitter.com/yxJUi66Xml

— Teddu 🐈 (@diyfieri) June 10, 2024

I wonder if shampoo and conditioner are friends irl or if it’s purely professional

— Jason, ex Inferis (@benedictsred) June 14, 2024

my friend scared a rat who tried to retreat into the subway grate but he was too chubby pic.twitter.com/vFqmuauFQ2

— normal guy (@CloudEnjoyer327) June 12, 2024

high asf n i walk in my grandma house n she got a CD rack for da ramen 😂😂😂😂 pic.twitter.com/qbcWbbRthu

— 5⭐️ bitch! (@HayahMichelle) June 15, 2024

the european mind cannot comprehend this pic.twitter.com/l493rR5XsI

— Justin Credible (@GravySauceCream) June 17, 2024

The Cybertruck after one week in Chicago pic.twitter.com/3SHiZ26Yik

— Not Jerome Powell (@alifarhat79) June 16, 2024

Holy shit my elevator goes to the philipines pic.twitter.com/RlimhENk2X

— shoujo .｡.:*☆ (@hnr004sei) June 18, 2024

hating your friend's boyfriend is a lost art

— ruhi (@cuntrave) June 19, 2024

When I walk in the Olive Garden pic.twitter.com/NltQKdh8nv

— John Rosenberger (@JohnJohnPhenom) June 20, 2024

the fuck was I on https://t.co/0P71jQorbk

— Amoeba (@curnbucket) July 6, 2024

Italians are just a different breed 😅Menu from one of the restaurants - is printed out screenshot from Notes app. pic.twitter.com/YjeOM8LTfq

— LIANDR 🇺🇦 (@TechLiandr) June 29, 2024

You should be able to google why a couple broke up

— ˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱‧₊˚ (@bendergirlfrend) June 24, 2024

filling out a passport application form for my four month old pic.twitter.com/ZwKwdrVHia

— michael 🙆🏻‍♂️ goldsmith (@mgoldsm) June 24, 2024

i’m in madrid and…….?????!!! pic.twitter.com/8ZfkKlpkm8

— Vardaan Arora (@vardaanarora) June 24, 2024

The only two genders I recognize pic.twitter.com/VubZYYachZ

— I’m Jeff (@whosjeffiam) July 6, 2024

The best feature of any accommodation I've ever stayed in is this duck, whose face appears at the back door whenever we crack open some snacks. 5 stars pic.twitter.com/pmNdVct4XJ

— Glenys Norquay (@glenisilla) July 6, 2024

a woman at the grocery store spent a full minute staring at these trying to figure out if they were normal nutella or some kind of weird variantyour clever redesign is someone else's source of stress pic.twitter.com/7Y2yH1QgYy

— caesararum, BS, DOGS (@caesararum) July 7, 2024

“Let’s get a table outside” Me: pic.twitter.com/tiXm0O1H7h

— “ (@wearevibin) July 8, 2024

why is she using the long form like it’s a formal email 😭 pic.twitter.com/T3IZAQUCYr

— vi ✰ (@ccloveoml) July 8, 2024

What if we kissed in the accordion part of the bus https://t.co/p08nmPj9qW

— Despachico (@_CHlCO) July 9, 2024

The last five years explained pic.twitter.com/6W0bnMfxVq

— ☔ (@Whotfismick) July 13, 2024

your head big asf https://t.co/njedbv8Qpe

— roa 🇵🇸 (@33roaaa) July 14, 2024

girl hell no pic.twitter.com/QLifJbXUoe

— 💽heather (@C05M1C57R4N63R) July 15, 2024

He’s their Regina George https://t.co/S8qpFfZuOT

— ARABIA HAS A PROBLEM (@arabianica) July 18, 2024

timeless pic.twitter.com/4zCauyAduo

— John B. Holbein (@JohnHolbein1) July 18, 2024

They got the vegas ball. It’s all over. We lost. pic.twitter.com/0EskhDXYxD

— aaron (@aaronoleary) July 19, 2024

US Map according to a Sri Lankan news channel pic.twitter.com/1CkRhxoJ5S

— Terrible Maps (@TerribleMaps) July 19, 2024

“I’m going to take a nap for half an hour”Me 6 hours later: pic.twitter.com/QS6MPtfsjB

— ☔ (@Whotfismick) July 19, 2024

The two genders pic.twitter.com/evm4C1zWRH

— Nick (@ogkrimkram) July 20, 2024

pic.twitter.com/WclBDZGgsa

— liz ⭐️ (@AstoundingSwift) July 21, 2024

??? pic.twitter.com/S5elHtX0KB

— ryan (@OhItsRyan) July 21, 2024

There hasn’t been 24 hours of peace in this country since 2019. Jesus take the wheel.

— OKSOTHICK. (@SophAintSayIt) July 21, 2024

indian news channels at it again 😭😭😭 pic.twitter.com/eqrh5n2Pkp

— 🍓 (@skskskskrrttt) July 22, 2024

I can't believe we used to pay for ringtones. If my phone rang now, I'd take a hammer to it.

— Granite Man 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 (@GraniteDhuine) July 23, 2024

lol just got to pittsburgh and someone left oxiclean at my dad’s grave pic.twitter.com/gb0gInNUsS

— Billy Mays III (@infinitethird) July 22, 2024

applying for a baby passport is funny pic.twitter.com/Z7SsBlU1Sx

— snail (@tallsnail) July 24, 2024

why do finance men wear backpacks. What's inside there. The money???

— delia (@delia_cai) July 24, 2024

The morning after JD Vance crashes on your couch pic.twitter.com/8MBxC0a8Lw

— Mulvaholland Drive (@Seinpeaks) July 24, 2024

So Trump is a sexual predator, and Vance is a sectional predator?

— Alex Cole (@acnewsitics) July 25, 2024

They had to use AI to create an image of Donald Trump praying. https://t.co/zOt7NCkEgO

— Pastor Ben (@BenjaminPDixon) July 24, 2024

Thinkin’ about wearing this to a Trump rally pic.twitter.com/lZiQVJJcHq

— Brandon Warne (@Brandon_Warne2) July 25, 2024

omg gender reveal, it’s french!!! #OlympicGames #OpeningCeremony pic.twitter.com/3mZs2HFYvx

— faith🌛 (@EurovisionFaith) July 26, 2024

This #OpeningCeremony has everything. Boats. Parkour. Accordians. A woman dressed as a croissant. More boats. Lady Gaga. pic.twitter.com/asclWZwTNi

— TechnicallyRon (On all the platforms) (@TechnicallyRon) July 26, 2024

things I did not expect to Google today #OpeningCeremony pic.twitter.com/HUuKp4XyRv

— taylor (@_eggnonymous) July 26, 2024

this look like a 2010 club picture https://t.co/HqtyViFPWG

— dee 🍑 (@LeciJ_) July 26, 2024

braving Costco on a Saturday pic.twitter.com/b14WuIo14x

— Taylor Schumann (@taylorsschumann) July 27, 2024

Me, patriotic AF, trying to learn the rules of badminton, archery, and handball at 3am during the Olympics: pic.twitter.com/d7VadUJjJ4

— ✨Sheree✨ (@gullah_gal25) July 27, 2024

Me: The U.S. sucks, I hate it hereBeyoncé: Introducing Team USA!Me: pic.twitter.com/HfWfz3rrAV

— Maicol 📺 (@michaelcollado) July 27, 2024

if i send u this just know im gonna put in WORK right after this nap pic.twitter.com/NUOtxeHDLM

— Matt Ellentuck (@mellentuck) July 29, 2024

my dad "watching tv" any time after 8pm pic.twitter.com/hhcIkBDM84

— Hayley McGoldrick (@GoldieOnSports) July 29, 2024

Italian Eminem #Paris2024 pic.twitter.com/aDYbk006LZ

— Today Years Old (@todayyearsoldig) July 29, 2024

Me the second Simone Biles Suni Lee or Katie Ledecky are on my television pic.twitter.com/yc8qWWEwVL

— brendan (@brendann2272) July 29, 2024

This is the flag of Massachusetts pic.twitter.com/nyEZeV2xkA

— fraser ramon (@SteveMerkle9) July 30, 2024

Republicans looking at the size of Kamala's rally in Atlanta pic.twitter.com/79jIHcSgJR

— Alex Cole (@acnewsitics) July 30, 2024

That back tooch??? He really ✨served✨ the country pic.twitter.com/A2yGqL6Wku

— Kim Chi (@KimChi_Chic) July 31, 2024

people who work from home looove to be like 'did you watch the olympics today'

— Meg ✨ (@mxgbx) July 31, 2024

No babe I like yours… you actually have a huge advantage at pole vaulting

— Kelsey Ryan (@420weedteen) August 5, 2024

Still find it hilarious that the Team GB skateboarding squad is just a bunch of children and a 50 year old man pic.twitter.com/oGmKdUgnkZ

— Charlie Reynolds (@cwjreynolds) August 6, 2024

I just know Tim Walz could teach me how to drive stick shift without making me cry once

— Carrie Courogen (@carriecourogen) August 7, 2024

Every new fact I learn about Tim Walz is like “he once donated his life’s savings to buying a puppy hearing aids”

— gianmarco (@GianmarcoSoresi) August 7, 2024

Tim Walz says “I hated it” to every single waitress who comes to take his empty plate away.

— Phillip (@MajorPhilebrity) August 7, 2024

If I send you this picture, just know I think I did that. #Olympics #BreakingForGold pic.twitter.com/tkH2Mu4RZR

— earphonejack95 ♑️ (@taylorann112) August 9, 2024

L.A traffic during the 2028 olympics is going to be a level of hell that hasn't been created yet.

— Tre James (@TiricoHairline) August 11, 2024

the nationalism leaving my body after the olympics pic.twitter.com/krMwOLnJDM

— manny (@mannyfidel) August 11, 2024

OJ White Bronco chase highways should be the Opening Ceremony route for LA 2028.

— Rob Perez (@WorldWideWob) July 26, 2024

my grandmas house just has a sticky note that says "LBGTQ" pic.twitter.com/dxIN2dBYPq

— ''tukwila girl'' (@sdrx902) August 12, 2024

Me waiting for the first HaHa in the group chat pic.twitter.com/kuKIFbttPG

— Andrew Strauss (@straussanator) August 13, 2024

congratulations ed sheeran 🏳️‍🌈 https://t.co/80aq7ypCaB

— tammy (@hxttogo) August 15, 2024

We went from August 1st to Aug 15th in just 5 mins. It’ll be Christmas in a few hrs

— Chris (@iamchriscorooo) August 15, 2024

If I say “I’m hungry’ we got about 11 minutes before I change personalities

— Billy Club (@BillyFuckinClub) August 17, 2024

gabezo pic.twitter.com/x1r7QOpUuA

— mr spinch ! (they/she) (@mooninfirst) August 19, 2024

Me cheering my friends picking the brunch spot I wanted the whole time and orchestrated behind the scenes to make happen pic.twitter.com/Oy6EG16LC7

— Andrew Strauss (@straussanator) August 20, 2024

Got a cute new little bottle for my Diet Coke pic.twitter.com/5ywWpnGgcI

— ☔ (@Whotfismick) August 18, 2024

Passwords leaving my memory as soon as I create them: pic.twitter.com/nBLAceER78

— Jenni (@hashjenni) August 18, 2024

The DNC is just Coachella for Poli-Sci majors

— Jill Hopkins (@Jillhopkins) August 21, 2024

"They fell for that Beyoncé rumor we planted Joe" pic.twitter.com/bwURAWkkFe

— Queens Child Project & Tubi Films Project Manager (@SoloChills) August 23, 2024

Maybe the surprise guest was the friends we made along the way

— B.W. Carlin (@BaileyCarlin) August 23, 2024

Their spouses… really… have hearts made of kevlar. https://t.co/qNL6SAS400

— Scottie (@ScottieBeam) August 23, 2024

when my boss sends a “gentle reminder” email to the group after i screw something up pic.twitter.com/RjWTbSmOrp

— steph (@whutyearisit) August 23, 2024

There’s a light projection of Steve Harvey over Atlanta right now and I have no clue why pic.twitter.com/r3Z7Vnua6t

— David Dennis Jr. (@DavidDTSS) August 24, 2024

Oh God, they're growing baby Trumps over at the Walmart! pic.twitter.com/2MFCxnaPUR

— TheRealThelmaJohnson (@TheRealThelmaJ1) August 25, 2024

this is going triple platinum in your family’s group chat https://t.co/2U0bRnKh2R

— bailey moon (@Baileymoon15) August 26, 2024

Another unconscionable lie from Tim Walz:In 2017 Tim was reportedly at a friend’s house and said, “Welp, I gotta head out.” But then stood in the entry way to chat for another 75 minutes!Which is it Tim? Do you “gotta head out” or not??

— Andrew Nadeau (@TheAndrewNadeau) August 25, 2024

Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened https://t.co/0bvvp4lo5R pic.twitter.com/Xd5o9UvM6z

— Morning Brew ☕️ (@MorningBrew) August 12, 2024