What Does Demure Mean? All About the Buzzword Going Viral on TikTok

Here's why you've been seeing the term everywhere this week

<p>Jools Lebron/TikTok (2)</p> Jools Lebron in August 2024 TikToks

Jools Lebron/TikTok (2)

Jools Lebron in August 2024 TikToks

Move over, brat summer — it's time for demure fall.

After TikTok creator Jools Lebron posted a video of how she gets ready for work in a “demure” way in August 2024, the trend has taken off, with thousands more videos under the hashtag "demure" popping up on the social media app.

Many users have now joked that demure, which typically refers to someone who is reserved, modest or shy, will replace “brat summer” in the fall after “brat” exploded thanks to Charli xcx’s album of the same name.

Related: What Is a Tradwife? All About the Controversial Lifestyle — And Why It's Having a Viral Moment

“Me transitioning from brat summer to demure fall,” one TikTok user wrote over a video of themselves changing from a mini skirt and crop top to a pilgrim-esque dress and two long braids which garnered hundreds of thousands of views.

So what does demure mean? Here’s everything to know about the new TikTok trend and where it originated from.

What is the demure trend?

<p>@iamthatenglishteacher/TikTok</p> @iamthatenglishteacher teaches the word "Demure".

@iamthatenglishteacher/TikTok

@iamthatenglishteacher teaches the word "Demure".

By definition, demure refers to a person who is modest or reserved, per Merriam Webster. It can also refer to a way of dressing modestly.

The demure trend is a satirical embodiment of that in which social media users joke about doing random things in a demure fashion, such as going to a show or getting ready for work. The joke stems from being “very demure, very mindful,” as Lebron would say, of others and what you’re doing.

In one video, Lebron explained how she was being demure after staying at a hotel by gifting the staff donuts.

“I do a nice six donuts, I do very nice donuts,” she said. “I’m not like these other girls, I don’t leave my room a disaster. I’m very mindful. I’m very demure when I leave the hotel.”

Another word often associated with demureness on TikTok is “cutesie,” and doing things in a gentle, graceful way. After her flight landed, Lebron made a video in which she demonstrated how she acted in a “cutesie” manner before deplaning.

“You see how I am when the plane lands? I don’t get up immediately. I don’t rush. I wait my turn,” the TikTok star said. “I’m very cutesie, I don’t do too much. I don’t do an applause when we land, I close my window. I’m very mindful.”

The video garnered over 1 million views, with United Airlines even commenting, “not standing immediately when the plane lands is so demure 🥰.”

How did the demure trend start?

<p>Jools Lebron/TikTok</p> Jools Lebron in an August 2024 TikTok

Jools Lebron/TikTok

Jools Lebron in an August 2024 TikTok

The demure trend started after Lebron, who has over 1 million followers on TikTok, posted a video on Aug. 2 explaining how she gets ready for work in a demure way.

“You see how I come to work? Very demure, I do my makeup, I lay my wig, I do a little braid,” she explained. “I flat iron my hair, I do chichis out, I do viral vanilla, very demure, very mindful. Let’s not forget to be demure divas.”

Since then, the video has accumulated over 3 million views and Lebron has continued to make similar content, from how to be demure when ordering food (salad over Wingstop, per Lebron) to how to be “cutesie” at a nail salon (bring your own fan).

Lebron has said that her videos are meant to be satirical and lighthearted, and has clapped back at users who have shared hateful comments on her posts. “I’m very mindful when I’m on the internet. I make jokey jokes," she said. "I don’t get mad and dissolve into transphobia, and I don’t lose my demurity over a joke.”

Lebron isn't the only person to use the word demure to describe a lifestyle, and has even called out creators like Devin Halbal and Selyna Brillare who have also made content related to being demure.

"The gag is, there has been so many demure divas who have come before me," Lebron said in one video, in response to someone asking where the word came from. "There's been Devin, there's been Selyna, there's been Venus Xtravaganza. Demure is just a way of life for the girls, for the dolls like me. With that said, I would love to give nothing but admiration, flowers, and respect to all those divas who have been demure this entire time. Who have paved the way for a girl like me to thrive."

How does the "demure" trend relate to past TikTok trends like trad wife and brat girl summer?

<p>Estee Williams/Instagram ; Narah Smith/Instagram</p> Estee Williams. ; Nara Smith

Estee Williams/Instagram ; Narah Smith/Instagram

Estee Williams. ; Nara Smith

Demure comes on the heels of several other viral TikTok trends, including the coquette, "trad wife" and "brat summer" moments.

The coquette trend picked up steam during the summer of 2023, and led to social media users donning romantic, whimsical clothes. Some staples of a coquette style included milkmaid tops, baby doll dresses, tights, ruffles and pastel colors, often inspired by the Victorian Regency era.

In the summer of 2024, another term — “trad wife” — came into the public eye as content creators like Nara Smith and Hannah Neeleman used their platform to show how they practiced traditional gender roles in their relationships. Their content mainly revolves around preparing meals for their large families and husbands from scratch and taking care of the children.

Around the same time, the "brat summer" trend was born, punctuated by neon green and people being unapologetically themselves. The lifestyle refers to being somewhat of an "It girl," but doing it effortlessly.

Now, the internet is transitioning from the brat summer to a demure fall. While the "demure" phenomenon borrows some characteristics from the coquette and "trad wife" trends, it's less of a lifestyle and more of an overall vibe, à la "brat summer." The energy behind "demure" could also be considered brat.

How are people responding to the demure trend?

The demure trend exploded in the first week since Lebron posted her video with at least 20 thousand people making videos under #demure and even more making jokes about it on X (formerly Twitter).

People have since begun to mimic Lebron’s videos, making ones of themselves being demure as well. In one video, a TikTok user explained how she eats her Chipotle burrito bowl “demurely,” showing how she ate exactly half of it so that the other half was in perfect condition.

“You see how I eat my bowl and it still keeps its composure and structure? Because I eat my bowl nice,” she said. “Be mindful of why you got the bowl, be mindful.”

In another TikTok video, a woman explained how she reads her book in a “demure” way.

“I don’t use random items like receipts as bookmarks. No, no, no. I use a real bookmark, very cutesie, very demure,” she said. “I don’t crane my neck left and right just to see the words in the corners. No, I crack the spine and now I can read comfortably. Very demure, very mindful.”

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