Could this be the absolute worst wedding invite to ever exist?: 'Straight in the trash'

Any couple who has gone through the process of planning a wedding will know it can be a stressful and somewhat fickle task. On top of choosing a budget, venue, dress, celebrant, music and food, there’s also the arduous and often political decision of narrowing down the guest list.

You might be eager to tear up the dance floor with your favourite cousins, but would rather avoid the slew of complaints that will inevitably come from your impertinent aunt. Or maybe it’s important for your childhood friend to be there on your special day, but you’re not the biggest fan of her new boyfriend (and he’ll probably rock up in sneakers anyway).

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To avoid the drama and fuss of it all, many couples opt to have a destination wedding, weekend away or small, intimate gathering where it’s appropriate to only invite the closest of friends and family. This was true for one bride-to-be who recently shared with a wedding planning Facebook group her plans to go out of town for the big day with “just immediate family”.

Bride-to-be asks guests to attend wedding 'in spirit'

But rather than leave the invite list to the aforementioned immediate family, she proposed an unusual plan to include those who weren’t deemed worthy of an official invite. Asking for feedback in the group, she shared a photo of an invitation to “join us in spirit” (hilariously, "spirit" was spelled incorrectly) which she planned on sending to “people who would be invited if we weren’t going out of town”.

The controversial invite — or should we say, ‘non-invite’ — was slammed online after another group member re-shared the post to a popular wedding shaming page, where the invitation was described as “tacky” and a ploy for “gift-fishing”.

“We’re having a wedding! You’re not invited,” one commenter joked.

“If you want people to know, but you’re not inviting them, send an announcement AFTER the fact,” another passionate commenter wrote. “And stop being so f***ing greedy.”

“There is no reason to send a ‘you’re not invited’ announcement unless it’s because they expect gifts,” a third person chimed in.

“This isn’t even a virtual ceremony? It’s just tacky,” another quipped.

"LMFAO if I got this, it would go straight in the trash," someone else said.

"She is going to get so many confused phone calls about this," another laughed.

Spelling mistake on 'invite' savaged

In addition to being slammed for wasting time, money and supplies to create the non-invites, people in the Facebook group also had a field day making fun of the way "spirit" was spelled as "spirt".

"OH. I will ABSOLUTELY be there in spirt!" one person teased.

"I don't know if I can be there in spirt, though," another mocked.

"My spirt will not attend," quipped a third.

"I cackled entirely too hard at 'spirt'", yet another said.

"I spirt my drink out," joked another (promptly winning the comment section).

Others also pointed out that - in addition to the audacity AND the typo - the entire design of the invite was off-centre.

Elopement announcement or tacky 'non-invite'?

However, some people defended the couple’s questionable choice of invite, including one commenter who said it appeared as more of an “elopement announcement” than a ‘non-invite’.

“I don’t see how it’s gift-fishing,” they added. “This reads more to me like someone that probably sent out save the dates, but got too over their head with wedding planning and said f*** it, elopement.”

But others explained that the entire concept of elopement was to run away, secretly get hitched and then announce it to loved ones after the fact.

“Who announces an elopement before it happens?” one person noted.

“I thought wedding announcements were separate from invitations,” another said. “Although in this day and age, just announce it to social media. I wouldn’t waste paper on this.”

Traditionally, however, eloping is by definition a secret affair and usually one without parents and family present. With this in mind, it would be safe to assume that this couple are not eloping, but opting to have a small, intimate celebration instead.

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But as pointed out by the many shocked and disapproving masses online, a link to watch the ceremony via a virtual recording — a popular option for couples who were married during the pandemic — was probably the least they could have done for those uninvited guests. Otherwise, it’s probably best to leave the announcement until after the wedding and forego any potential gifts.

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