Carson Daly Talks Openly to His Kids ‘Like They Were 30’ About Mental Health — and Even Marriage Counseling (Exclusive)

The 'Today' co-host shares his three children, Jackson James, Etta Jones, London Rose and Goldie Patricia with wife Siri Pinter

• Carson Daly, who shares 4 kids with wife Siri Pinter, tells PEOPLE that he has made sure his children know the importance of speaking up when something doesn’t feel right both physically and emotionally

• “Their whole lives, they know two types [of health], there's physical health and mental health,” he explains

• In having these talks with his children, the Today co-host explains that he has "given them the benefit of the doubt to rise the intellectual occasion"

As Carson Daly continues on his mission to “walk the walk” when it comes to mental health advocacy, he knows the importance of starting the conversations at home.

The Today co-host, 51, who shares his four kids Jackson James, Etta Jones, London Rose and Goldie Patricia with wife Siri Pinter, tells PEOPLE that he has made sure his children know the importance of speaking up when something doesn’t feel right — both physically and emotionally.

“Their whole lives, they know two types [of health], there's physical health and mental health,” he explains.  “If you hurt your wrist at school, you go to the doctor. And if you're feeling sad and you really don't know why or if there's something going on in your mind, you're having a hard time grappling with, you talk to somebody about that too.”

Related: Carson Daly Says Sleeping in Separate Bed from Wife Siri Helps Them 'Stay Together': 'Highly Recommend' (Exclusive)

He says when it comes to having these discussions with his kids, who range in age from 4 -15, he’s never shied away from honest dialogue.

“I've always talked to them like they were 30 years old,” he says. “I've always intellectually given them the benefit of the doubt to rise the intellectual occasion when I'm kind of kicking the knowledge and I do it a lot.”

And part of that honesty means not hiding the work that he and his wife of nearly 10 years are doing for their marriage.

“My wife and I have gone through couples therapy where they've walked in the room on Zoom and it's not like I hide it. ‘Hey, what are you guys doing?' " Daly says of his kids' responses. " ‘Oh, we're doing, mom and I do our couples therapy. We get to do it once a week.’ ”

He adds of their conversations, “ ‘Marriage is hard. This helps mom and dad out.’ That's how I talk to my kids.”

Daly, who first opened up about his own journey with anxiety and panic disorders after a conversation with Kevin Love on Today in 2018, is hosting Project Healthy Minds' upcoming gala on Oct. 10 in New York City.

His partnership with the organization, he says, is “organic,” “important” and “personal.”

“What's exciting about this is ... it's so close to my real life,” he says of the Oct. 10 gala that will feature special guests like Demi Lovato, Savannah Guthrie, New York Governor Kathy Hochul and honoree Chance the Rapper. “It's like a test that you don't have to study for, but you're going to ace. That's what it feels like.”

In addition to the gala, the organization is hosting the “world’s largest festival for World Mental Health Day” in New York City, including panels and discussions with Lovato, Daly, Hochul and more.

Related: Carson Daly Says He Thought He Was ‘Going to Die’ After First Panic Attack at ‘TRL’

Project Healthy Minds' CEO Phillip Schermer tells PEOPLE that having the support of famous faces is “wonderful.”

“When public figures shine a light on mental health, it makes it so much easier for others to speak up about their own mental health journey,” he says. “And when people can open up about their feelings, they can begin to search for and find the help that they so desperately need and deserve.”

Daly echoes Schermer’s sentiment, explaining that after he shared his own story on live TV, he learned first hand how important it is to speak up.

“People just kept coming up to me and kind of winking and like, ‘Hey man, thanks for talking about that panic attack. I have them too,’” he recalls of an interaction with a man "in a business suit" that reminded him of Fight Club.

"I think people have this idea that people who had mental health issues, at least at the time, they were somehow reserved for really a certain sect of society that was in the shadows, if you will," Daly continues.

“There's tons of sort of high-functioning versions of people who are struggling in silence,” he adds. “I think maybe for a moment in time I represented that and I was really glad to, to be honest with you, I never regretted it.”

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