Bride fat shames size 10 bridesmaid after cancer diagnosis: 'Cruel'

·Lifestyle Editor
·5-min read

A devastated bridesmaid has revealed she dropped out of her friend's wedding after she was fat shamed for gaining weight as she was undergoing chemotherapy to treat her cancer.

The 24-year-old said in a Reddit post she had known 'April' for 15 years and there were always plans for her to be her bridesmaid when she got married.

The wedding was postponed due to Covid and the bridesmaid then received the news she had cancer. She was able to have surgery and chemotherapy and added April had been supportive and arranged bridesmaid dress shopping around her schedule.

"When we picked the bridesmaid's dresses April said she would be paying for them and alterations, she said it was her way of thanking us for being there for her," the bridesmaid explained.

"We chose to buy mine a size up from what I wore become chemo could cause weight gain. Unfortunately, I've had to go through more rounds than first predicted."

The bride and her bridesmaid had an argument over the bridesmaid's weight gain. Source: Getty
The bride and her bridesmaid had an argument over the bridesmaid's weight gain. Source: Getty

The bridesmaid added about a month ago they went to try on the dresses but the one purchased did not fit.

"I was embarrassed. I didn't want to leave the change room but April talked me into coming out as the other girls hadn't seen me try it on and they were excited," she said.

"I came out and explained the problem to April, apologised and offered to pay her back for the dress and to pay for the alterations to make it fit. All that needed doing was for it to be let out, it had been taken in at a previous fitting before I had more chemo.

"The seamstress said that it was easy to do and that it wouldn't damage the dress as we had bought a bigger size in the first place."

The bridesmaid said everything was fine up until they went out for dinner to celebrate the upcoming wedding.

When they ordered dinner, the bridesmaid opted for a pasta dish and it was then she claimed April changed her attitude.

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"April gave me a strange look and then made a comment about how it was no wonder I didn't fit into the dress and how I couldn't just say the weight gain was from the chemo," the bridesmaid wrote.

"I was in shock about it and didn't know what to do then when someone told her it was a horrible thing to say she started saying I would ruin her wedding pictures and it was already bad enough that she had to buy a size 10 dress just so I would fit into it and now her pictures would be ruined by a 'whale who can't stop stuffing their face'. "

The bridesmaid added April's comment wasn't "fair" and she had been on a diet since her diagnosis to counteract any weight gain. She said she then "lost it" at the bride.

"I did raise my voice, I told her that I can't believe anyone could be as cold and heartless as to say that and considering how she's been there throughout this whole thing the only conclusion I could make was that she's a narcissist who should be given an Oscar for her acting talents," the bridesmaid continued.

"I said not to worry about the pictures because I wouldn't be there at all and that I'm glad she can't get a refund on the dress then told her fiance he should just contact a divorce lawyer now to save time because it would be sad to be stuck with her then I left.

"I've been told I was harsher than needed and shouldn't drop out this close to the wedding but I don't see why I should have to be there after I was humiliated."

A bride holds hands with a groom.
The bride was called a narcissist by her bridesmaid. Source: Getty

People commenting on the post were shocked by the bride's behaviour and supported the bridesmaid in her decision to drop out of the wedding.

"That's not something you say to someone regardless of cancer or chemo. That's f***ed," one said.

"Your response may have been blunt and to the point, yet you have every right to say what you said," another claimed.

"You need to be supporting your health with eating normally, not shamed. This bride is not a healthy friend for you," somebody commented.

"She was cruel and rude, and also very very wrong if she thinks a size 10 is anything like fat," a fourth added.

It comes after another bride called out her bridesmaid for gaining weight before her wedding.

Writing on the popular Mumsnet forum, she explained that her friend hadn’t lost enough weight to fit into her bridesmaid dress, and is "even bigger than ever".

The bride-to-be says she’s now stressed about having to find and pay for new dresses, with her wedding in just nine months.

Users were quick to debate both sides, with 49 per cent saying the bride was being unreasonable for expecting her friend to lose weight.

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