Yahoo Lifestyle I Didn't Need To Work Out Last Week Because I Was Literally Forming Abs While Laughing At These 38 Funny Tweets
Hey, y'all. With the election three weeks away, it's feelin' a little too spooky right now. I think we could all use some laughs.
So, let's all take a deep breath (in the words of my yoga teacher, in 1 2 3..., out 1 2 3...), relax your shoulders, lean back, and enjoy all the funny tweets I found this week:
1.
me in interviews: i just wanna be part of your COMPAAAANNNYYYYYYY
— certified luvr girl🍓 (@shrubious) October 7, 2024
2.
It’s okay to take off your glasses once you feel you’ve seen enough for the day. https://t.co/ePKwNTArvM
— Lebo Kgothadi. (@LeboKgothadi) October 7, 2024
3.
Not my parents taking this opportunity to photograph their giant skeleton. 🤦🏼♀️ pic.twitter.com/Oijlq9JAuQ
— Dr. Samantha Montano (@SamLMontano) October 10, 2024
4.
incredible things happening on the morning walk today pic.twitter.com/WofQMiPorF
— nate of the living dead (@MNateShyamalan) October 13, 2024
5.
wearing this with devil horns and going as the devils lettuce for halloween pic.twitter.com/uFJXjh931P
— sevyn ✃ (@sativalor) October 6, 2024
Twitter: @sativalor / Via allurebeverlyhills.co
6.
people think I’M bad but someone asked for my number in front of my little sister and she wrote it down for him in a gum wrapper, threw it on the ground and said “fetch!” and he did it 😭😭😭😭
— 🎀🧸🎀 (@lovedoveclarke) October 7, 2024
7.
We told my 4yr old I was pregnant and she was NOT happy about it. After she cried in her bed she came downstairs hands on hips and asked in the most accusatory tone “And where exactly is this new baby gonna sleep?” like we were two teens who hadn’t thought this pregnancy through
— Mandalynns23 (@mandalynns23) October 10, 2024
8.
You know it’s officially spooky season when the cauldron light comes on pic.twitter.com/UQc797TvbV
— k (top 99% on OF) (@how_do_i_pdf) October 12, 2024
9.
director's cut? yeah i don't really care if a filmmaker is circumcised or not, i'm more about the movies
— JT (@tallboythinlegs) October 12, 2024
10.
driving and conversing in the car with my child then she says “simon says just drive don’t talk” 🙃🙃🙃gagged tf out of me
— Zonnique (@Zonnique) October 10, 2024
11.
12.
The scientists after conducting the prison experiment: https://t.co/H7k31QAnke
— Gil, so confusing (@GilroyMusic) October 7, 2024
13.
how it feels to skin ur knee as an adult https://t.co/UWh4hwTRO9 pic.twitter.com/YOgqRTfOfI
— bug girl (@buggirl) October 10, 2024
14.
You clearly weren’t a child when high school musical 2 premiered https://t.co/gCimHBl1IM
— rev (@whyrev) October 7, 2024
15.
this makes me realize just how silly we looked asking for new music omg. like i know she chuckled https://t.co/3sFXCQFk9c
— tia (@cursedhive) October 12, 2024
Bloomberg Technology / @cursedhive / Via x.com
16.
“THE ohio state university” shut THE fuck up
— maha (@mahaaaay) October 7, 2024
17.
people in the Midwest are so nice someone in the bathroom was like “cocaine?” and I was like “I don’t have any” and they were like “no I’m sharing”
— Josh Trebach, MD (@jtrebach) October 7, 2024
18.
Don’t forget. pic.twitter.com/uNG1Co8qTO
— Jesse Jerdak ➡️unplugged at PAX (@JesseJerdak) October 6, 2024
19.
i have an area in my backyard i call "the big stew" it's a pit i dug where i dump old batteries, gas, household chemicals, and dr pepper. i stir it once a month
— jame (@kloogans) October 12, 2024
20.
buying a used car and telling people it’s a rescue
— cass city (@HeavenlyGrandpa) October 6, 2024
21.
They killing goldendoodles!!!!! https://t.co/JwyY6gDBU9
— Galactus (@BJStrongArmAHo) October 8, 2024
22.
End of an era 🙏🏾✨ https://t.co/Em2uzBZq1T
— Not Scorpio Babe. (@vxlxncia) October 10, 2024
23.
i sent my sister a picture of the outfit i wore to a party last night pic.twitter.com/jbqP510jv2
— Isabel Steckel (@IsabelSteckel) October 11, 2024
24.
or: https://t.co/WUpHnhmJ5M pic.twitter.com/R2wFnlwyr3
— Jabari Ali Davis (@JabariADavis) October 7, 2024
Richard Mackson/Sports Illustrated via Getty Images / Via Twitter: @JabariADavis
25.
Yesterday I said to my kindergarteners “alright my little noodles” and one of my boys whispered to himself in wonder “I’m spaghetti?”
— maddie, hot dog enthusiast (@damnitmadeline) October 11, 2024
26.
https://t.co/69nMW4Z48t pic.twitter.com/AXTvs2Fiqg
— ᵐᵉʰᵉᵏ (@m3h3k__) October 11, 2024
27.
In high school, I told my crush I was in love with him. He was straight and nothing happened. His MOM later knitted me a quilt because she felt bad. Today, we still refer to it as the guilt quilt. https://t.co/2kOv1NeQoj
— Himbo Goober (@SummerDreamZZZ) October 11, 2024
28.
What if we kissed under the lower-case serif STOP sign pic.twitter.com/CGy1bG1Fif
— microplastics impossible: ghost brotocol (@DiabolicalSpuds) October 13, 2024
29.
my boyfriends kickball teammate has his baby with him so i’m watching the baby during the game i just realized everyone thinks this is my baby so now i see why they looked so concerned when they asked what his name was and i said “oh i have no idea”
— awalmartparkinglot ✨🪩🕺🏼🖤 (@awalmartparking) October 10, 2024
30.
then explain this ? https://t.co/B4Z2m7lV7a pic.twitter.com/OEJP9Qw4sh
— Michelle (@kajujezz) October 9, 2024
31.
Lmfaooo women are toooo funny pic.twitter.com/LdecjoIHYc
— Midge. (@ibukksss) October 11, 2024
32.
Why are you, a restaurant website, gatekeeping your online menu by making me choose delivery or pick-up, when I merely need to mentally rehearse my drive-thru order
— meghan (@deloisivete) October 10, 2024
33.
Maybelline great lash mascara https://t.co/GfGilv5Auy
— Odessa✨🦂 (@missodessa) October 12, 2024
34.
Me when I discovered L’Oréal dream matte mousse in middle school https://t.co/Lz2GH4tSow
— Swiftie Sports Center (@SwiftieESPN) October 13, 2024
@JohnCornyn / Via x.com
35.
why are grape flavored things always flavored after the purple grape why doesn’t the green grape get any love
— dj (@pleasekilljay) October 10, 2024
36.
the vegetables in my freezer watching me grab pizza rolls again pic.twitter.com/4E0vUagGvn
— ⛧ Luis Vercetti ⛧ (@97Vercetti) October 12, 2024
37.
someone left their corn in the women’s bathroom at Dulles International Airport pic.twitter.com/XriwMtDMRg
— Jamie (@spacej_me) October 10, 2024
38.
Traffic was crazy in the bathroom https://t.co/WsuRtUG21i
— Jackie Memphis (@Jayleejnr) October 11, 2024
Thanks for laughin' along! For more funny tweets, check out our most recent roundups:
I'm Snickering Alone In My Room At These 30 Funny Tweets From The Week
I Feel Abs Forming After Laughing So Hard At These 39 Jokes About The VP Debate
