My Stomach Hurts From Laughing At These Hilarious Job Tweets From Last Week

Well, it's almost time for work again — but first, here are some funny job tweets that went viral over the past week.

Twitter: @RodLacroix1. — Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) November 19, 2024
Work is giving us a Thanksgiving lunch today so to make it more authentic I'm getting drunk and telling everyone I'm not happy with some of their life choices.

Twitter: @strowhiro2. — Michelle Strowhiro (@strowhiro) November 19, 2024
My cat *literally* ate my discovery, please advise pic.twitter.com/LsFdEdlBuW

Twitter: @chernobelskiy3. — Aleksey Chernobelskiy (@chernobelskiy) November 19, 2024
Can't believe this is actually on somebody's page lol pic.twitter.com/oB6wxflG01

Twitter: @Kica3334. — Kristen (@Kica333) November 19, 2024
I accidentally told my boss I loved him while getting off the phone so if anyone needs me I’ll be walking directly into the ocean.

Twitter: @saltyskin_5. — Stephanie ♡ (@saltyskin_) November 22, 2024
Gal at work has 2 10 month old identical twins and her husband thinks he put them in the wrong cots and they’re not sure which one is which 😐😂

Twitter: @DynastyBanks6. — Dynasty Banks-Couleé (@DynastyBanks) November 19, 2024
I got on one of my students cause her crocs are COVERED with charms and I said you see my crocs very demure very mindful.. she said (I kid you not) “well you must not wanna serve Cunt” pic.twitter.com/hgRFKrSvYC

FX / Twitter: @m4cden7. — mack (@m4cden) November 22, 2024
how i show up to work after giving myself 8 minutes to get ready pic.twitter.com/UZn9fWUts0

Twitter: @ItsToad_8. — Toad (@ItsToad_) November 21, 2024
As per my previous tablet… pic.twitter.com/Fo0cFO7YSN

Lionsgate/ Tyler Perry Studios / Twitter: @diabolicalpree9. — Pree (@diabolicalpree) November 21, 2024
My coworker is eating a tuna sandwich at 8am pic.twitter.com/8iAXF6hG1m

Oprah / Twitter: @DejonNoMustard10. — Dejon. (@DejonNoMustard) November 19, 2024
Just remembered I had jury duty on Tuesday. Last Tuesday. pic.twitter.com/ILa6bVSTpr

Twitter: @NC_Renic11. — Neil Renic (@NC_Renic) November 20, 2024
Apologies for the late response, instead of spending three minutes answering your email I ignored it and felt anxious for two weeks

Twitter: @stargaasm12. — KARL (@stargaasm) November 21, 2024
i hate when im the only boy at my job because hell no i can’t pick up those heavy ass boxes either girl…. pic.twitter.com/EGQ33k3Au8

Twitter: @schlife13. — Zach Schiffman (@schlife) November 22, 2024
Sending important messages on slack pic.twitter.com/F6fgizS39r

Twitter: @grrrrlbossing14. — i really need a michelada rn (@grrrrlbossing) November 22, 2024
period tracking app notifying me that my period is five days late while i was showing my coworker something pic.twitter.com/Id9xVWE0eB

Twitter: @oofirenee15. — ironknee (@oofirenee) November 20, 2024
told my therapist that maybe all i need is a real eater to save me…she cut my session short

Twitter: @mayahiga16. — Maya (@mayahiga) November 21, 2024
do u guys think I should keep letting my assistant manage my calendar pic.twitter.com/rcyRsHNI7r

Twitter: @lilydsmith17. — The Ginger Swindler (recovering sixers fan) (@lilydsmith) November 20, 2024
someone just responded to an email saying ‘i have no clue what you’re talking about’ and honestly so refreshing. let’s normalize not knowing what the fuck is going on.

Jake's Takes / Twitter: @missuonmylips18. — balkanka (@missuonmylips) November 21, 2024
Had awful day at work but managed to scrape enough weed crumbs from my grinder to put together a joint pic.twitter.com/mnmhpngwE9

Twitter: @mckinneykelsey19. — kelsey mckinney (@mckinneykelsey) November 21, 2024
Having a job is really getting in the way of my true calling and passion: planning thanksgiving dinner

Bravo / Twitter: @realoverheardla20. — Overheard (@realoverheardla) November 21, 2024
Going to your 9-5 because you were too embarrassed to dance on TikTok in 2020 pic.twitter.com/sxLqtD2N4H

Twitter: @WhysBlud21. — 🦔 (@WhysBlud) November 21, 2024
I just want an internship man pic.twitter.com/X3eEq0NKm4

Twitter: @Jane_Doe8222. — Brunette Bohemian (@Jane_Doe82) November 22, 2024
Your email found me watching The Muppet Family Christmas on my phone during work hours

Bravo / Twitter: @chelpowell23. — chelsea (@chelpowell) November 20, 2024
me at age 32 coping at work knowing Liam’s funeral is today and none of my coworkers understand pic.twitter.com/rlTNkRNWMS

Twitter: @IsabelSteckel24. — Isabel Steckel (@IsabelSteckel) November 21, 2024
working on my resumé pic.twitter.com/5RzYnkoNAm

Twitter: @MySkinIsBeamin25. — 𝐆𝐥𝐨𝐜𝐤 𝐀 𝐃𝐨𝐨𝐝𝐥𝐞 𝐃𝐨𝐨 (@MySkinIsBeamin) November 19, 2024
A man came to my job today, and he got his gf $700 worth of makeup and perfume, and when she said it was too much he said “it’s whatever you want princess, you know that.” Now what if I had just k*lled myself in front of them. then what???https://t.co/N3LWZkbN73

Twitter: @ItsRayRayBabyy26. — Only1Ray 🫡 (@ItsRayRayBabyy) November 19, 2024
I’m looking for my shoes and my resident got em on 😭😭😭😭😭😭 pic.twitter.com/lmxVnmSSwp

Twitter: @sariverse27. — sarina (@sariverse) November 19, 2024
the 8 year old i tutor will be walking down the street with me and be like “that place makes the best coffee in town” and i’ll be like “clara you are eight” and she’ll just smile and say “yeah. i have a little sip sometimes no biggie” https://t.co/HEnyB4ymzf

Twitter: @kenzianidiot28. — kenzi (@kenzianidiot) November 20, 2024
my surgeon called me at 5:16am to say he cant do surgery today, his wife went into labor. my check in was 5:30am. i was already en route, didnt sleep, took 3 weeks off work, and my mom flew out from WI. i feel like he should legally have to name the baby after me.

Twitter: @dodgonkulator29. — (doctor) Alex Grease (@dodgonkulator) November 19, 2024
work trips make you feel like a big man even if you're not going anywhere glamorous like yes actually I am urgently needed in Muncie IN

Twitter: @aspenkatana30. — ♱ katana ♱ (@aspenkatana) November 18, 2024
Maybe I should take a break lmfaooo pic.twitter.com/y9C5My3H5x

Twitter: @lilfaiithh31. — faith (@lilfaiithh) November 23, 2024
nun at work fina scream “LORD NOT MY UNCLE" so l can go home

Twitter: @jazzanchovy32. — jazz (@jazzanchovy) November 22, 2024
At around 3pm today it officially becomes The Holidays- you don’t have to try at your job and you can drink at any time. This typically lasts until Reyes Magos but you can push it to MLK day if you have the courage

Like reading funny job tweets? Here are a few more.