Woman Keeps Former Roommate's Half of the Security Deposit Because She Didn't Help Her Clean. Now They're Fighting

• One roommate did all the cleaning after the other refused to help — and left behind damages and trash

• So the one who cleaned kept the full deposit, using part of it to cover unpaid bills from the rental

• The situation has divided friends, leaving the roommate seeking support from Reddit on whether she was in the wrong

A woman is turning to the Reddit community for advice after she refused to share a security deposit with her former roommate.

The 31-year-old poster explains the circumstances that led her to keep the deposit after a three-year living arrangement with her roommate, whom she refers to as H. The pair had lived together in a two-bedroom apartment for the last couple of years and had developed a close friendship.

However, their differing standards of cleanliness often caused friction. “She is neat and tidies often,” the poster admits. “I had a bad habit of leaving things strewn about, jackets, pencils, socks, I struggled to keep on top of dishes, and rarely cleaned her bathroom.”

While the poster acknowledges her own shortcomings in maintaining tidiness, she also highlights what she saw as a major issue on H’s part: the care of her cat. According to the post, H’s cat was poorly cared for, leading to recurring issues with fleas and worms.

The situation escalated when the poster became frustrated with H’s minimal efforts to address the flea problem. “I was paranoid of fleas hitchhiking when visiting my mom and her cats, so I vacuumed weekly and combed her cat daily since she was only willing to do it ‘when she had time,’ ” she writes.

Related: Man Says He Owes His Roommate $11. Now the Roommate Demands He Pay Back ‘Double’ Without Any Warning

Despite H citing financial constraints as a reason for not purchasing specialty cleaning supplies or shampoo for the cat, the poster points out that H still managed to buy luxury items like a VR headset during the same period.

After months of tension over these issues, their relationship grew strained. The poster describes how she eventually banned H’s cat from her room and removed all her linens from shared spaces.

This led to what she calls “spiteful” behavior from H, who began cleaning excessively but without addressing the core concerns about pet care.

The breaking point came when it was time for the pair to move out of their apartment. The poster explains that there were damages in the unit — a hole in the wall caused by her, and carpet damage attributed to H’s cat.

H decided that cleaning wasn’t worth the effort since she believed they wouldn’t get their deposit back anyway. “She left anything she didn’t want (kitchen utensils, used kitty litter, a couch, cleaning supplies, food), kept egging for me to ditch my things for the landlord to deal with, saying ‘that’s what the deposit is for,’ ” the poster recalls.

Determined not to lose out on the deposit entirely, the poster took it upon herself to clean the entire apartment over two days. Her efforts paid off when their landlord returned the full deposit.

Related: Man Gets Mad at Roommate for Sharing Video of Him Sleeping in His Underwear on TikTok: ‘Total Violation of Privacy’

However, a week later, H reached out asking when they would split it. At this point, tensions boiled over.

“I snapped and I told her I was keeping all of it,” writes the poster. She explains that she felt justified in keeping the money since she had done all of the move-out cleaning on her own after H refused to help.

H was angered by this decision and argued that her contributions over their three years of living together — particularly in terms of regular cleaning — meant she deserved half of the deposit.

The poster acknowledges that their dynamic had been imbalanced at times but feels that H’s refusal to assist during move-out justifies her decision. “During our 3-year stay, I left a lot of clutter around the apartment and lacked the same level of initiative to clean,” she admits.

However, she adds that H never communicated how much this bothered her until after they moved out: “She claimed my cleanliness was an issue for 3 years but never brought any issues to my attention in order for me to correct my behavior.”

The situation has divided opinions among their mutual friends. One friend suggested that maintaining their friendship should take precedence over money and urged the poster to give H her half of the deposit. However, others have sided with her decision based on principle.

The poster also reveals that she used H’s portion of the deposit to cover unpaid bills from their final month in the apartment rather than keeping it as personal profit.

Still, this hasn’t resolved tensions between them. “She still seems unwilling to accept anything but the deposit she didn’t care for,” writes the poster.

Now, the poster is worried she was wrong for keeping the money for herself.

"Is that even legal? Are you allowed to keep her half of the security deposit? I guess it all depends on the terms of your lease and if you were paying as one or separately for rooms," asks one commenter.

"If she paid half the deposit you’re not entitled to keep her half," writes another. "You don’t get to get paid for cleaning at the end of the lease, your reward for cleaning is that you get YOUR deposit back."

A third offers: "I would deduct my hours of cleaning from her half. She didn't help with the final clean and wasn't worried about the deposit."

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