Why Is ‘The Real Housewives of New York City’ Reboot Flopping So Hard?

There’s a disconnect between reality and reality TV that The Real Housewives of New York City struggles to fight. It’s a balancing act, after all. You need to be confrontational and direct. You should be aware that you’re making TV, while not being overly introspective of your own actions. And you shouldn’t make your show feel like one big infomercial for your personal brand.

Holding yourself back is something Ramona Singer never quite learned. Maybe if she had, she’d still be on TV. Her replacements are well-aware of what era of TV we’re in, one where social media apologies for any minor slight are simply the norm, and relatability is valued over nuance. It’s a world entirely foreign to that where Jill Zarin sent her daughter to fat camp and Luann de Lesseps told an aspiring model that losing weight is the easy part.

The new RHONY is a carefully crafted work retreat, where a group of women who don’t trust each other or the cameras get together once a week to make a show they don’t entirely believe in. That’s why this cast works so much better on paper than on Bravo. It’s not offensive, nor is it unwatchable, but 10 episodes into its second season, it’s clear RHONY hasn’t quite found its groove.

One big reason for that is the continued enigma that is Jenna Lyons. Moreover, it’s production’s unwillingness to push Jenna in any way to show more of her life on camera. This week, Jenna sells off some of her vintage pieces, a pretty neat insight into her world that’s slighted by the fact it’s all we really get from her. Jenna is in a very serious relationship and yet we haven’t even met her partner, nor does anyone seem to ask her about it. We don’t even find out how much money Jenna makes from the wardrobe sale—and those are the crude details us gluttonous fans want!

Meanwhile, Erin and Racquel sit down to hash out their problems. Now, you may be wondering: “Since when are they beefing?” and the answer is vague at best. The pregnancy prank apparently caused some real ripple effects in the group dynamic, but this tepid sit down shows that it didn’t create anything to justify its 4-episode arc.

The actual beef of interest brewing is Erin vs. Ubah, something that does make their role on the Bravo FanFest “besties” panel a bit funny. That’s something that will take off in Puerto Rico, alongside Ubah vs. Brynn and Brynn vs. Rebecca Minkoff, giving this season some late promise.

As for this episode, well, it’s a tepid endeavor. The highlight of it is the theme for Racquel’s engagement party, as there isn’t one theme, but five—and they’re all bizarre. A party where the theme covers CEO cosplay to Madonna and “glitterific” sequins is so quirky cute, like yeah sure let’s just keep adding to the theme. It’s as close to “notes on camp” as this budget Met Gala could reasonably get.

Even better, Erin and Abe do the “opposites attract” theme, Erin showing up as “generic man” while Abe does Dorinda Medley drag. That’s his attempt on an Erin look, but maybe it’s a hint she better shape up or ship out if she wants to make it on this franchise. He tells it like it is, but he always makes it nice.

The party itself is very “great gowns, beautiful gowns.” It feels like 10 minutes of women greeting each other. There are little hints of Ubah vs. Erin, but of course, nothing happens. Why would something happen? People don’t fight at classy parties, nor do they fight on new RHONY.

Next, Brynn sits down with a Glamour magazine writer to talk about some trauma, which sounds familiar because it literally happened last week, just with Erin. Apparently, Brynn is writing a book and Ms. Glamour is ghostwriting it for her.

It reminds me of the Season 6 arc where Aviva Drescher reveals she wrote an entire book through a series of emails before accusing Carole Radziwill of ghostwriting What Remains. Except, here, the humor of that absurdity is extracted and played straight.

It’s even more head-scratching that Brynn’s tragic sexual assault story is presented here, when a flashback to her talking about it with her brother exists. Why was that scene cut when so much filler has made the final edit? It’s indicative of a larger production issue, one that further explains why these women can be interesting, strong characters and the show itself can come across so choppy and dull.

The episode ends with Erin and Brynn putting some meals on wheels while Sai, Ubah, and Racquel hang out at Sai’s house. Over at Sai’s, the ladies decide to go on a trip to Puerto Rico, where Racquel can attempt to reconnect with her mom, and the rest can fight on the beach.

Ubah is still annoyed with the prank—moreso, Erin’s claim that she knows secrets about everyone in the group—while Erin is just annoyed with Ubah. While Sai and Racquel attempt to deflate the situation, Brynn spends her charity day working hard to instigate a real fight between the two. That’s civil service.

The thing is, there’s great potential in these brewing feuds. But they can’t brew forever, and 10 episodes in, it’s time to pick up the pace. This isn’t the first episode to end with the exciting prospect of future drama that doesn’t come to pass, after all. From the pregnancy prank to the false start of Erin vs. Jenna, this season has struggled sticking the landing. You only get so many chances before viewers give up.

Thankfully, the Puerto Rico trip kicks off next week, which looks like it’ll comfortably be one of the best episodes yet this season. No surprise that coincides with the return of queenie Rebecca Minkoff, whose so-bad-it’s-good anti-charisma has made her a star among this image conscious cast. That’s surprising to say given she’s an established celebrity who’s also a Scientologist, but we’ll take it.

As for the rest of the New York City Housewives, it’s time to start working for those apples before they rot.