Domenica Calarco is well known as a reality TV star from the 2022 season of Married At First Sight Australia. Dom's been through it all and as Yahoo Lifestyle's sex columnist she is sharing her big sister advice about all the taboo topics you wish you could ask about – and nothing is off limits.
Question: I'm recently out of a long-term relationship. How do I explore new kinks and be good in bed after only sleeping with the same person?
We all experience break-ups or broken hearts at some stage in our lives. Getting back on the horse is always the most difficult part. Since my MAFS journey and sharing my story of divorce, so many people have reached out to me with their very own struggles with moving on and trying to find ‘the one’... again!
Every break-up comes with heartache, and everyone heals differently. Making sure you are in a good headspace mentally as well as being able to allow love back into your life is key.
Coming out of long-term relationships is daunting for many reasons; putting yourself out there again, learning how to use dating apps, and of course… sex!
Often in long-term relationships, life can get in the way and we start to fall into routines… Say goodbye to the spontaneous root bent over on the kitchen counter, or Sunday morning glory – children, work or pets all tend to become an excuse from time to time. Being single, embrace your newfound spontaneity!
I don’t think there is anything wrong with getting complacent in a relationship, sex takes work – but good sex takes effort! Moving on with a new partner is often daunting – a new intimate partner means an all-new set of tools to work with – but take it in your stride and have fun with it!
When you meet someone new, you get to set the tone. Be open and upfront about who you are, and most certainly what you like in the bedroom.
The most important thing to remember is that in order to enjoy yourself you need to be comfortable. Get back into the swing of things, so do some self-exploration to find yourself again. Watch some porn! I highly recommend checking out MakeLoveNotPorn.tv, porn done in a more real-world way.
What gets you off, what are your kinks? What do you wish your ex would have done more of in the bedroom? Take the time whilst healing from your break-up to reinvigorate your more sensual side so that when you are ready to play the field again you know exactly what you want.
Remember, confidence is key to orgasm.
Listen to Dom's podcast Sit With Us with Ella Ding wherever you get your podcasts.
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