Yahoo Lifestyle Experienced Parents Share The Quick (But Important) Advice They'd Give To New Parents
Recently, I asked the experienced parents of the BuzzFeed Community to share quick advice they would give new parents they met on an elevator. Here is some helpful advice for the new members of Club Parent:
1."If you want to raise a decent human being, be a decent human being. Your kid is watching how you move through this world. Do it with kindness, and you will raise a kind person. Also, apologize to your kid when you screw up. Be accountable for your actions."
2."When your child is born, ask their doctor what medication is recommended for if the child is ill and then go buy it. The first time my daughter was sick, I panicked because it was the middle of the night, and we had no medicine."
3."Don’t fall too far down the social media rabbit hole. Do your research, sure, and find new ideas, but ALWAYS talk to your pediatrician. The internet is not the be-all and end-all."
4."Comparison is the thief of joy. It doesn’t matter whose baby walked at nine months and who walked at 15 months! Earlier is not always better. My two children have been on very different timelines (developmentally), and that’s okay."
5."I think I told my boss after he had his first child (mine are both in their 20s) that, 'Eventually they become some chick or dude living in your house, and that being a father had been the greatest experience of my life, and that I hoped that he would enjoy it as much as I did.'"
6."Every kid is different. Even kids with the same parents in the same home, so don't beat yourself up if you feel like you don't know what you're doing. None of us really do."
7."If you have the space, and you’re no longer/decided not to do something only one parent can do (ex: breastfeeding), 'take turns' handling the nightly stuff. One night, you wake up when needed (feeding, diaper change, screaming, etc.) while your spouse/partner/SO sleeps the full night. The next night, you get to sleep, and the other parent handles the middle-of-the-night stuff. There is no reason everyone needs to be awake. Dads can handle the night stuff, too! When you’re up at 3 a.m. doing what needs to be done, knowing you’ll get a full night's sleep the next night makes it much easier to handle."
8."If your partner is 100% breastfeeding and you can't do the night feeds, do something else to help. Have the baby for a chunk of the day so your partner can catch up on sleep."
9."Treasure every step... don't waste time waiting for them to start walking, start talking...it all goes so fast in retrospect. Also, please write down the cute things they say and do. Capture the moments that you can."
10."You're bound to f*ck some things up. You're going to make mistakes. You're going to do things you wish you'd done differently. It'll be OK. Just love and be there for your child."
11."Overnights, one parent is awake while the other sleeps. Someone takes 8-12, and someone takes 12-4 (extend to 8-1 and 1-6 if you can). Everything will be better if you both get a solid block of sleep."
12."I say 'please' and 'thank you' to my daughter before she could speak, but I've never had to ask her to say it herself as it's natural to her."
13."People often really don't care about your new baby. They're just asking you about your baby bc they want an opportunity to talk about theirs. Their kid might be 15, but they want to tell you stories about when she was a newborn."
"You make their day when you humor them!"
14."I'm a new mom here! When my infant wakes up during the night, I never turn on a bright white light. Instead, I use a red night light. It’s bright enough to see but dim enough to allow my husband to stay asleep and my baby to fall asleep easily."
—Anonymous, 31
15."Everyone is going to offer unsolicited advice. Don't feel pressure to listen to it, no matter who it is from; just do what works for you and your baby."
16."Watch 'Happiest Baby on the Block' on YouTube. It shows you how to soothe a baby and helps much more than I expected. The other is The Wonder Weeks app. The idea behind it is that babies have mental growth spurts (leaps), and during them, they may be fussier than usual, not sleep, and not eat. The app can tell you when to expect them, and it was so relieving to know why my kids were acting differently. It's also cool to see which skills they develop. It was accurate to the day for my son. He'd be out of sorts, and I'd worry he was sick and then check the app to see he'd started a leap."
—Anonymous, 44
17."Don't let them do too much. Your evenings at home around the dinner table eating as a family is precious and worthy of protection. So many children and teens have too much on their plate, and they're overwhelmed. So, limit how many things they're involved in season by season to give them time at home with their family."
18."There is no 'one-way method' of parenting. Be the best parent you can be, but don't stress perfection. Strive for perfection, but be realistic. There will be ups and downs. Take care of yourself so you can take care of your children."
—Anonymous, 30
19.And finally, "Try not to get caught up in the many conflicting tips/strategies you’ll hear and focus on two things: what works for your child and what works for your family. If you think about those two things, you’ll usually be on the right track. And remember that a happy, relaxed caregiver is one of the best things out there for a child because it allows for a true connection between you, so make sure you take time to take care of yourself."
Do you have any advice you'd give a new parent? Comment below!
