Eva Mendes says she feels ‘lost’ now that her daughters are older

It’s not often that Eva Mendes opens up about her life as a mother. The actress, who shares her two daughters with partner Ryan Gosling, is famously incredibly private about her family life. But in a rare new interview with Drew Barrymore, she opened up about some of the things she’s been feeling as her kids have gotten older, and it turns out that in some ways, the stars really are just like us.

Mendes appeared on The Drew Barrymore Show on Thursday, Sept. 19, where she and Barrymore had plenty to talk about—the two are both moms to two girls, and they’re similar ages right now. Mendes’ daughters, Esmeralda Amada and Amada Lee, are 10 and 8 years old, respectively. Barrymore shares her two girls, 11-year-old Olive and 10-year-old Frankie, with her ex-husband, Will Kopelman.

“Eva and I used to be hang buddies back in the day, in a very different chapter. I guess life is a book with chapters!” Barrymore joked, before wistfully adding, “Those were fun chapters.”

She then turned to Mendes and shared a compliment with her fellow mom: “When I watch the way that you navigate the world—how you conduct your life, I have such deep admiration.”

Barrymore continued, sharing some of the confusion and disorientation she felt when she first became a mom.

“I felt a little lost when I had kids, in the sense where I was like, I don’t really know how to do that job and be other people,” she explained. “What was it for you, may I ask?”

For Mendes, though, it was the opposite.

“Yeah, I felt—I actually didn’t feel lost. I felt very clear, but then I felt lost, if that makes sense,” she said. “Then when it was the cliche of, ok well, who am I now after the kids can survive on their own?”

Mendes then added her very relatable experience now that her girls are getting a little older.

“I mean, they’re only 8 and 10, but you know what I mean? They don’t need me every second, it’s a little different,” she said. “But I love talking to my girls about anything so I feel very fulfilled.”

It’s certainly a transition when kids start growing up and getting more independent. Mendes is clearly feeling that—but like Barrymore noted, life is full of chapters. This one is just as beautiful as the rest, because watching kids blossom into whole people is an incredible thing to experience.