Bride Refuses to Allow Cousin with Alopecia to Wear Headscarf or Wig at Wedding
The bride, a devout Catholic, believes her cousin's alopecia is a "punishment from God" that should not be covered
A Catholic bride isn't allowing her cousin to cover up her alopecia at her wedding.
In a post on Reddit's r/wedding forum, a woman with alopecia explained how her cousin doesn't want her wearing a headscarf or wig to her nuptials. The bride, a devout Catholic, believes her cousin's alopecia is "a punishment from God for leaving" the church and wants everyone to see it.
The poster's hair loss began when she was 9 years old. Since then, she's worn a headscarf to hide her head and keep her "falling hair from ending up all over the place." Now in her thirties, the woman said she left the Catholic faith decades ago but is still being judged by her family for it.
In regard to the bride's feelings toward her scarf, the woman wrote, "She does not like me wearing it calling it, 'A blight on my soul and a disgrace to the Lord!' "
When the "brainwashed" bride asked the woman to be her maid of honor, it was a little surprising considering they haven't spent time together in several years. The poster said that's been her choice because her cousin frustratingly always likes to say that, "she is older and thus in charge."
The pair's surviving family members are also on the older side and the bride wants her wedding party to be "young and full of life," so she asked her cousin to be the maid of honor — with the caveat that she doesn't wear a scarf. When a wig was offered as an alternative, the bride also shut that option down.
The woman now questions whether or not she was a back-up choice due to the short time frame in which she was asked. "Weddings are usually planned a year or more in advance," she wrote. "It leads me to believe that her chosen MOH quit and she needs a replacement quick."
She asked the forum: "I want to tell her it's the wig or me not showing up, but I'm not sure if I'm approaching this the right way. Any advice?"
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In the comments section, Reddit users advised the woman to decline the invitation.
"If she's calling your alopecia, 'punishment from God,' I would not be her maid of honor," one person commented in part. "She can stand up there all by herself if that's how she treats people. It's gone beyond ignoring your comfort to just insulting you to your face. You don't deserve that."
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Many Redditors are also Catholics, and said that the bride must be reading from another Bible because her poor treatment of her cousin doesn't align with their interpretation of the faith.
"She's mean not to mention that there's a centuries old tradition of women covering their hair/head in the Catholic church and none of the reasons have to do with punishment," another person commented. "Personally I wouldn't participate since she's judging you as some sort of fallen woman."