Bluey bans: The dumb reasons America is censoring the beloved show

OPINION

While it appears Americans aren't prepared to do anything about the rampant gun violence sweeping their nation, they're more than ready to crack down on bum violence. Take Disney+ temporarily banning the hilarious Bluey episode "Family Meeting". If you've got kids or simply enjoy the world's most beloved and successful ABC Kids animated series, you'll know the episode where dad Bandit is accused of farting in his daughter Bluey's face. It's hilarious.

And relatable, as family life and farts are inextricable. In the ep, the Heelers call a family meeting to get to the bottom of whether Bandit has dropped a silent-but-deadly bottom burp. Like all dads, of course, Bandit pleads not guilty, and then there's a veritable Dutch oven's worth of fart gags let loose throughout the episode. Because who doesn't love a fart joke?

Like all Bluey episodes, the ep offers a delicious side order of moralising for the young'ns after Bluey gets Bingo on board by bribing her young sibling with a lollipop to say she witnessed the fluff. Mum Chilli, playing judge, demonstrates to Bluey that the truth will set her free. So everyone comes clean before Chilli even drops her own butt bomb. It all ends with horsey back rides for everyone. Very cute. Very funny. Yay!

But initially, this episode never aired in the States as it didn't meet Disney+'s own standards. It's not the only episode Yanks have turned their noses up at, but only recently have folks in the US cottoned on to the fact they've been watching a diluted version of the show, thanks to a TikToker whose now-viral video revealed seven things that were censored in the third season.

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Take Episode 1 in Season 3, when Bandit, referring to his vasectomy, got the snip. In the original version, Bandit said, "Look, I'm keen to get it done, but Chilli, she wants to keep her options open. But I don't know. Do we want any more of these things running around?" In the US version, it bizarrely becomes about Bandit losing his teeth. "I probably should get it done. But I love my dog teeth. What if one day I just want to bite someone?"

However, the most controversial episode was "Dad Baby" from Season 2, when Bandit pretends to give birth, illustrated by Bingo sliding out of a baby carrier strapped to him. This very funny episode was considered so contentious it still isn't shown in the US.

Neither are Americans too keen on seeing Bandit get nailed in the nuts. Disney+ eradicated the hilarious scenes where Bingo is on a swing and cracks Bandit hard in the balls and also when Chilli lobs a ball that smashes Bandit in the same spot. Yet, this kind of content has made Bluey such a global phenomenon because the writing is so cleverly cross-generational.

Rather than just speaking to kids, Bluey also speaks directly about parenthood. After all, having a show that you can happily watch (and watch and watch and watch ad infinitum) with preschool-aged children is a godsend. Our beloved Heelers demonstrate family life is messy. Farts happen. Daddies get vasectomies and get hit in the testicles. Kids puke on planes. Meanwhile, in the US version, there is no vomit. Perhaps the weirdest censoring is cutting a pony dressed as a unicorn pooping on grass.

While no one would be against trying to maintain a sense of innocence for kids, to us Aussies, all of this seems so innocent. Most of us wouldn't even bat an eyelid at these high jinks. Yet there is a weird dichotomy in protecting kids from pony poop, considering the realities US kids face, such as children younger than five participating in active shooter drills at preschool.

Let alone what they've inadvertently witnessed in the age of the 24-hour news cycle, including the 421 mass shootings that have taken place in the US to date this year. As of August 1, at least 25,198 people have died, according to the Gun Violence Archive – an average of roughly 118 deaths daily. Of those who died, 879 were teens, and 170 were children.

Thank heavens we live in Australia. Give me bum violence over gun violence any day.

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