Betty Gilpin on Filming the Graphic Sex Scenes in 'Three Women'

The STARZ drama Three Women follows the lives of three women on a crash course to radically overturn their lives, and one of those women, Lina (Betty Gilpin), is a homemaker in suburban Indiana, a decade into a passionless marriage when she embarks on an affair that quickly becomes all-consuming and transforms her life.

Lina’s affair with her high school ex-boyfriend Aidan (Austin Stowell), features incredibly graphic sex scenes that include male nudity. For the GLOW star, it was a learning experience as she worked with Claire Warden, the intimacy coordinator, and found a comfort level she hadn't experienced previously.

“I’ve done many sex scenes before this show, and I’ve shrugged my shoulders and rolled my eyes at them and waived them off as this necessary algorithm box that we had to check to get to the rest of the show for people to watch it,” Gilpin says. “This was so different. It was such an integral part of the show and a necessary part of the show, a story about female desire. And they ended up being some of the most emotional and important, and my favorite days on set and helped me process some experiences that I didn’t realize I had negative experiences with. This was so positive.”

Three Women, based on the eponymous novel on sexuality in contemporary America written by Lisa Taddeo, also stars Shailene Woodley, DeWanda Wise and Gabrielle Creevy in the true life story of Lina, Sloane (Wise), a glamorous entrepreneur in the Northeast; and Maggie (Creevy), a waitress in North Dakota.

As the story unfolds, all three women are in flux as they seek to change their lives, and while at these crossroads, they are convinced to tell their stories to Gia (Shailene Woodley), a character based on Taddeo who in real-life drove around the U.S. searching out compelling women's stories that she turned into the book.

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“When Lisa’s book came out, I was just so consumed by all three stories and really saw parts of myself in each of them,” Gilpin says. “Lina, in particular, I was just so struck by how unapologetic her desire was, and her need was, and that we’re meeting her at a time in her life where she’s really at a breaking point of desperation, of needing to be touched and kissed and held and celebrated while being treated so invisibly by the people around her.”

Then Lina meets Gia, who gives her the emotional attention she craves, which gives her the push she needs to reunite with Aidan and begin their affair, which gives her the physical attention she craves.

“I think between Aidan and Gia, she can patchwork together one full person giving her all the things she needs and deserves,” Gilpin says.

During our Zoom chat, Gilpin also discussed the importance of women telling stories about their wants and desires, the bond she formed working with Shailene Woodley, and the universal themes in Three Women.

Had you read the book, or did you get the script first and that was what intrigued you?

I read the book right when it came out. Every woman around me was pretty obsessed with the book. And then I had a meeting with Lisa Taddeo. Right before the meeting my agent said, “Well just so you know, they’re making a TV show of her book Three Women’, and I flipped out. I was like, “Why didn’t you tell me before?” And he was like, “Because I knew you would flip out like this and get too excited.” And she was so incredible. And then months and months later, I made an audition tape, and I was pretty honored to be a part of it.

What was it about the Lina/Gia relationship do you think that made Lina want to tell her story?

I think that Lina is somebody who, the genre of her life that’s in her head and in her heart is not what she encounters in her daily life. I think in her soul, she was not made for minivans and PTA meetings and no sex and no talking or kissing. I think she was made for her own version of Princess Bride and made to be her own surging important protagonist. And Gia comes along and says, “Listen, all the qualities in you that other people are telling you are embarrassing or shameful, I think those are the most special things I’ve ever encountered.”

I think Lina has been waiting for this moment her whole life. I think she’s tired of being silent and tired of trying to muffle her light, and here comes someone who says, “I’ll shine it in this book,” and she says, “absolutely.”

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Did you and Shailene become confidants as well?

Absolutely. I love her so much. As an actor, it felt like this strange parallel universe where Gia and Lina have this deep connection, and I really felt that Shailene and I also did. I’ve never quite connected to somebody in a scene like that, and it felt powerful. I think we could both feel it. It’s something that I’ll point to for the rest of my life in terms of a pivotal work experience.

This is a story of women’s sexuality and desire. I think in the #MeToo era, it’s nice to have women who actually can get to tell their own stories. Is there something you hope that women learn from this?

I think that so much of #MeToo was so vital and focused on, rightly so, what women do not want, the kind of attention they do not want, the kind of treatment they do not want, the kind of experience they do not want. It’s also so important to talk about what we do want and what our desires are and what we strive for physically, emotionally and what we deserve. I think those conversations are just as important.

Lina is someone who wears her want on her sleeve, and I think that seeing a character who is so connected and unapologetic about what she wants, I hope it inspires people to go after what they want.

Did you get the opportunity to meet her and talk to the real woman Lina is based on? Or did everything that you know about it come from Lisa?

Everything I knew came from Lisa and from the book. I never was in touch with the real Lina. I tried to do service to the person’s soul and experience from what I saw on the page and did my best.

Each of the women’s stories in this are unique, but do you think there’s a universality to the stories that women around the globe will be able to relate to?

Absolutely. I think that’s part of the beauty of the book is that you get to really see yourself in each of these women’s experiences, even though they’re three totally different people and from different parts of the country and at different phases in their life and communities. Because you’re seeing the inner workings of their brains and souls at very pivotal times in their life and experiences that feel very universal to women, I think it’s a pretty profound thing to see something that you thought was yours alone, to see it on the page or on the screen in a shared way. I love our show for that.

Three Women debuts today on STARZ at midnight on the STARZ app and at 10 p.m. ET/PT in the U.S.

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