Yahoo Lifestyle I'm Dying Laughing At These 34 Unfiltered Things People Were Brave Enough To Post On The Internet This Month So Far
We're more than halfway through ~spooky season~, but there have already been a ton of amazing jokes from Twitter this month! There's no way you'll read all of these without cackling like a witch. Enjoy!
And follow the accounts that made you laugh so your Twitter timeline will be even better!
1.
donʼt ask me for relationship advice. i went back to the same person 17 times
— jynx (@jynxbby) October 16, 2024
2.
Good Lord, you licked the box clean. https://t.co/mVCrLDMSOW
— le’Giza (@Givenkazeni) October 15, 2024
3.
Seeing a Cybertruck really does ruin your day. Because wtf is that
— petite barbie. (@joigabrielle) October 16, 2024
4.
Is it fall or winter?! pic.twitter.com/eW5MF7fhap
— #BreonnaTaylor, MSW (@Stea1TH_06) October 16, 2024
Bravo / Twitter: @Stea1TH_06
5.
i laughed out loud pic.twitter.com/tBfdctK44G
— elle (@itselleokay) October 15, 2024
6.
Why Nobody told me Top Golf was $100 tf I look like Tiger Woods??
— landonfrostt (@starcosmetics2) October 11, 2024
7.
— 🤠 (@heavensbvnny) October 11, 2024
8.
Whenever someone hops on a Zoom meeting and is like “Sorry I look like such a mess, haven’t had my coffee!” or like”Please excuse the lighting!” it’s like….babe….I’m physically incapable of not staring at my own reflection for this entire meeting. You don’t even exist to me
— Meg (@megannn_lynne) October 11, 2024
9.
driving and conversing in the car with my child then she says “simon says just drive don’t talk” 🙃🙃🙃gagged tf out of me
— Zonnique (@Zonnique) October 10, 2024
10.
i was gonna tip but i saw u laughing w that other table im sure they got u 👍🏾
— xavier (@nahimdifferent) October 11, 2024
11.
messaged someone on grindr and didn’t hear back and then 10 mins later they’ve changed their name to ‘MASC ONLY’ pic.twitter.com/TwBAOVjaV1
— domlzz again (@domlzz) October 9, 2024
HBO / Twitter: @domlzz
12.
me with $47 in my account: yall wanna go to dinner? get some drinks??
— jojo (@_jwigz) October 8, 2024
13.
The difference between 180° and 360° be whooping y’all ass!
— No. (@GeoNeonPeach) October 5, 2024
14.
Nature is regressing 😍 pic.twitter.com/BzaQdWPihL
— zayzaysworld (@f4iryluvrr) October 16, 2024
15.
him: fuuuuuckme: ⭕💢⭕💢⭕💢⭕💢⭕💢⭕
— el3na 🎀🫧🎃 (@lilbratel3na) October 5, 2024
16.
not invited to something i did not want to go to with people i do not like pic.twitter.com/j3M8ZqRDMU
— jo (@cowboypraxis) October 13, 2024
A24 / Twitter: @cowboypraxis
17.
last night i was serving this 3 top (two guys and one lady) and on god every time one of the guys would get up to go to the bathroom she’d start making out with the other
— brecht apologist (@madisontayt_) October 6, 2024
18.
why my dad on facebook talking about “who daughter can i take out to eat” BITCH YOURS! I HAVENT SEEN YOU IN 7 YEARS
— hbk (@hbkraee) October 4, 2024
19.
I should quit my job to focus on cooking dinner
— Katie 🐝 (@kayteebee99) October 16, 2024
20.
chest hair is boy cleavage, never think they don’t know exactly what they’re doing when they’re showing it
— Maizie ⭐️ (@postboob) October 7, 2024
21.
Gays running to the smoking area when a song by Ed Sheeran comes on in a gay bar pic.twitter.com/Rpvmx3AJPh
— Meh (@Spilling_The_T) October 9, 2024
VH1 / Twitter: @Spilling_The_T
22.
You ever walked outside and ain’t see yo car
— Ciggest 4 (@deemtfmoney) October 8, 2024
23.
me after bottoming for a hour: https://t.co/BH9w2aWHSb
— joshua. (@livingthroughJ) October 15, 2024
Nickelodeon / Twitter: @livingthroughJ / Nickelodeon
24.
me when someone asks me what i have in my “rari” pic.twitter.com/xvM6pWWfcK
— doomer (@uncledoomer) October 8, 2024
CBS / Twitter: @uncledoomer
25.
told dentist i bought a electric toothbrush and he asked what end i used pic.twitter.com/OSuNBRpLVt
— •ᴗ- (@evadentz) October 7, 2024
Fox / Twitter: @evadentz
26.
I wish coworkers would fight in the bathrooms like in middle school
— $ (@Hnzdz) October 7, 2024
27.
if i have a baby with my man and we break up he gotta take the baby
— ᛕꪖíꪶꪖ (@piinkmink_) October 5, 2024
28.
every time I'm at the dentist with my BITE ME inner lip tattoo I got at 19 pic.twitter.com/QqZ5sALj7p
— mariana (@pastapilled) October 4, 2024
HBO / Twitter: @pastapilled
29.
I was in the library brushing my beard and another student turned his head 360° like an owl, looked me dead in my eyes, and said he "thought somebody was raking leaves".... does college have HR?? pic.twitter.com/y7wS6wvfK6
— $aint $mith 🕊 (@SaintSmith_) October 3, 2024
Bravo / Twitter: @SaintSmith_
30.
Yes i have a mom https://t.co/CBecM4cImu
— Grip Bayless✨ (@talleyberrybaby) October 2, 2024
31.
Actually it’s pronounced “jaslight” - you’ve been saying it wrong the whole time
— Stone Cold Jane Austen (@AbbyHiggs) October 2, 2024
32.
me watching any reality tv show: what type of PTO do y'all got
— . (@kingbealestreet) October 2, 2024
33.
29 yea told man btw pic.twitter.com/G5baKIAsVK
— lux (@lamegff) October 1, 2024
34.
brat single-handedly undid four decades of D.A.R.E.
— Andiamo (@awejones) October 15, 2024
