Yahoo Lifestyle 10 Worries to Nix Now
By Robin Powell
1. Offending a friend
You can’t change the past, but you can learn from it, says psychologist Paula Robinson from Sydney’s Positive Psychology Institute. “There’s a lot of opportunity for growth in making mistakes,” she says. So if you’ve shot your mouth off and said something you regret to someone you care about, apologise and promise to make your criticisms more constructive next time.
2. Too much on the to-do list
Make a comprehensive list and prioritise each item. Delegate what you can, develop a strategy and timeline for the rest—and sleep well.
MORE: DE-STRESS YOUR TO-DO LIST
3. Performance anxiety
Presentations, exams, sporting contests, deadlines—they can all trigger the jitters. The key, says Robinson, is preparation. If preparing for a speech, for example, put pen to paper two days before the big day, then practise reciting your words to your partner or an honest friend. Once you’ve got the words straight, visualise yourself doing a good job. If you’re a perfectionist, remind yourself that doing your best is enough.
4. Poor body image
Worrying about body image is the kind of thinking that goes round in a circle and never gets anywhere, says Robinson. “If your body shape is a legitimate concern, don’t just worry—do something about it. Use the SMART (specific, measurable, achievable, realistic, time-bound) approach to setting goals. For instance, “I want to lose 5 kg before my birthday in October”.
MORE: NO-FAIL WEIGHT-LOSS TIPS
5. Losing your job
Worries often relate to our deepest fears, which rarely materialise. To face such fears, visualise the worst-case scenario. Though undoubtedly serious, unemployment, for example, is unlikely to lead to homelessness. Instead, a new opportunity could arise.
6. Your kid doing badly at school
Instead of focusing on problems, concentrate on solutions. Talk to your child and your child’s teachers about how he or she might use their strengths to improve. Teach your child result-focused thinking, too.
7. Getting older
True, no one’s discovered the Fountain of Youth yet, but hitting another birthday isn’t so bad! Though we can’t stop time, we can have a huge say in how we feel, how we look and what we do as we age. Accept—and embrace!—the reality of every year and make positive, healthy choices every day to help slow the clock.
MORE: GROW OLDER JOYFULLY
8. Money
Research proves that having more money doesn’t equal more happiness. If you’re suffering from financial stress, seek advice on how to work your way out of it and find help to support you while you do—book a session with a financial planner or sit down with a financially savvy relative. And if you’re worried that you won’t be able to retire with a city pad on the water, acknowledge the simple things in your life that make you happy and adjust your thinking.
9.The future
“People who live in the present and worry less about the future have higher levels of wellbeing,” says Robinson. Her advice is to keep the serenity prayer in mind: God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
10. Not feelin’ the love
Instead of deciding that your partner’s poor taste in birthday presents means he doesn’t really love you, be grateful for the little things he does do to show his love. And put time into making other areas of your relationship work better.
