Teachers Are Breaking Down The Parent Cliques They Encounter Every Year, And It's Basically Straight Out Of "Mean Girls"

Recently, I decided to ask teachers what parental cliques they see forming year after year, and they had some wiiiiild things to say. Here are some of the most interesting:

1."In my school, I’ve noticed that a lot of the PTA parents are the parents of the ‘rich popular kids,’ and they often end up tipping a lot of odds in their kids’ favor, such as letting their kid switch classes, change lunches, and get good grades even if they didn’t do that well in school. It was awful."

2."The newest group of parents I'm seeing are is 'we don't parent' parents. Their kids are not to be disciplined or corrected. Anything they do is deemed okay, regardless of how ridiculous."

"They don't think rules are important at home so of course these kids have no concept of how to function in a community of 30 kids who all think they are deserving of special attention. Try and call home? Good luck. Ask them to come in for a meeting? Nope. We are just constantly told we just don't 'get' their kid. No, we get it: your kid has no concept of having to share or be told NO. Every single one of them wants a specific schedule or accommodations that work for them, and everyone else be damned. I'm glad I only have three years left, lol."

—Anonymous

3."These days, there are ALWAYS moms who make private Facebook groups posing as a group for 'Ms. Smith's Class'. They will say it's to coordinate class parties, talk about homework, etc., but instead, it ALWAYS comes around to shit-talking the staff and nit-picking everything the school does."

Columbia Pictures

"Not every parent joins it, but the ones who are in it are so active. I had a parent who was also staff show us in the lunchroom how much the parents pick apart everything, all day long. I saw comments even down to how staff will dress, like complaining about how clashing colors in an outfit makes us look unprofessional. I have heard countless accounts of parents from these groups cyberbullying staff, and sometimes the receipts from these cliques show up at PTA and Board of Education meetings."

—Anonymous

4."There is definitely a contingent of 'party' moms and dads. Parents who still party like they’re in undergrad and document it all on social media. I mean, they all have kids, but where are those kids when their parents are hosting Beer Olympics? Grow up. Parents, you are setting a poor example. No elementary school child should ever see their dad do a keg stand."

—Anonymous

5."I am not sure I know a clever name for it, but I have been dealing a lot with parents who demand my personal phone number and expect me to respond immediately to their every text and call, often expecting me to sacrifice the time I should be spending teaching to walk their child out of the building to them (ignoring school policies), or immediately respond to their every question, comment, or need."

HBO

"I recently had a young parent call me 'cringe' because I refused to hand over my personal information, as though telling me they are 'one of those parents who text all the time' would actually motivate me to hand over my details.

Parents seem to be feeling increasingly entitled to access their children's teachers immediately and around the clock, ignoring the fact that we have our own lives and classrooms full of students whose needs are just as important as their own child's."

—Anonymous

6."High school teacher here. Parent group chats are a thing now and they're the bane of my existence."

7."The avoiders, who don’t want to get involved or help with anything; the room moms, who help with parties and PTA; the buy-stuff parents, who send stuff as needed to help out; and the controlling PTA parents (and staff), who have been there a few years and don’t want new parents’ help or input and try to shut down anything they say or do. That last one really gets on my nerves, as we can all pitch in, and we all have ideas!"

8."There will be parents who naturally group together in friend groups, and they naturally will complain about you. Personally, I've learned to manage it by being very hands-on and communicative from the beginning with parents about grades and behavior in the classroom, good and bad."

"I'm also a pretty strict teacher, and I establish that at the beginning of the school year so people know to expect it. If you're strict but kind and stick to your rules, people will like you. If you're nice but you humor the parents' whims and demands at ALL, you are stressing yourself out for no reason and letting them treat you like a doormat."

—Anonymous

9."I'm in my 40s, so I have been teaching for quite some time. The idea of 'cliques' certainly applies to parents; you have your PTA moms, soccer moms, etc., and in past years, some of those people may have been a bit pushy, but overall, things were fine..."

10."There have always been parent cliques, but really, they're not a big deal. I know that parents will make friends with other parents and form groups. I can see their cliques forming, but really, it has no bearing on me — I do my job, teach their kids, grade their homework, and go home."

— Anonymous

11."If I could say one thing, it would be: Parents, you are your child's parent. You are not their friend."

"Some of the things you need to do for them, like making them do their homework, taking away their screens, or grounding them, will make them angry. You still need to do those things. When I, as a responsible adult in their lives, take away their phone or make them do their homework, and you compromise my authority, it is bad for your child."

— Robert, 43

12."Types of parents: the Ghosts. Occasionally, a student lets slip something about them, but other than that, you have no proof they exist."

ABC

"The No-Shows: Won't show up for a damn thing even if they say they'll show up for a damn thing.

Stuntin': They have to come in all their Gucci and Prada just to prove a point.

Overworked: If you ever had to call them, chances are it's while they're at work, and chances are they also have no idea which of their kids you're talking about.

The Grandparents: For whatever reason, the parent isn't in their children's lives or isn't the one trusted to take care of them. Meaning you're trying to explain high school concepts and issues to people two separate generations away."

"It-Takes-A-Village-ers: Any of the smallest events — like conferences or report card pickups — means that it's not just mom and dad who come. It's the aunties, the uncles, the grandparents, and possibly some cousins. Bring extra snacks."

"The Karen: The parent who thinks they can tell you how to do your job because they once saw an Abbott Elementary episode.

The Haven't-I-Seen-You-Before: This type of parent is fun for you, not for the student. Because chances are, you know their parent to the point where you feel very comfortable telling the parent exactly what's going on. Also, chances are you've seen that parent somewhere for years, like church or something, meaning that kid knows they can't escape if they've done anything wrong to you.

The Best Friends: The parent who thinks their kid is their best friend, or that they should be their kid's best friend and won't do a damn thing to discipline them even if they say they will."

—Anonymous

13."Coming from a millennial: Millennial parents are a different breed. I don't understand why exactly, but they hardly ever do anything about their kids' misbehavior. I had a phone ban in my classroom, and a clique of moms literally paid me a visit because they claimed their children needed their phones in the classroom. Meanwhile, their kids' grades had already risen in the few weeks since I'd enacted the ban."

Universal Pictures

"I hate to be like, 'When I was a kid...' but seriously, when I was a kid, our parents would usually (and rightly) believe our teachers over us until they had all the information. In 90% of cases, that is the right course of action. Because you know what? Kids LIE.

Millennials just aren't parenting like our parents did, and yeah, sometimes that's good, but our kids are very entitled and don't know how to socialize. They won't always have mom to give in to their every whim."

— Rachel K.

14."Parents, I'm begging you to be nice to us. There was a Facebook group for well-meaning parents at my school that was, unfortunately, overrun by weirdo parents who have too much free time and even made up weird conspiracy theories about us brainwashing their kids."

15.And finally: "I think this is unique to me because I live in a very small town. My wife and I both work at a small private university in my state, so I am an educator, but I want to talk about our experience with other parents at my kids' school..."

Have you noticed any parent cliques popping up at your kids' school? Share them in the comments.

Note: Some submissions have been edited for length/clarity.