'Survivor 47's Caroline Vidmar Says She Pushed for the Split Vote That Doomed Her as 'Andy Management'

Survivor 47 is here! Every week, Parade.com's Mike Bloom will bring you interviews with the castaway most recently voted off of the island.

Caroline Vidmar's time on Survivor 47 came as a layover between business school and resuming her job as a strategy consultant. So it's understandable that she had one of the biggest heads for numbers in the game. Through 22 days, Caroline was one of the most tactics-forward players, making moves on friend and foe alike without struggling with her emotions the way her competition did. It only makes sense, then, that she would be done in by the other "numbers guy" in the season: Andy Rueda. As Caroline visualized her seat at the final Tribal Council, Survivor 47's wildcard made sure that seat would be on the jury bench. A high-stakes plan known as "Operation: Italy" played out to great success, leaving Caroline lost in the sauce as she was taken out.

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Caroline came hot out of the gate, as Sue Smey immediately connected with her, reminding her of her daughter. The two also built a dynamic with Gabe Ortis, and the three quickly took control of the Tuku tribe, cementing themselves as the majority. As Caroline expressed during a journey, her focus now was to maintain that position of power. And so one of the so-called "wounded birds" attempted to herd the cats that were the Tuku alliance through the postmerge. Her efforts paid off in spades, as the group wound up as four out of the Final Nine. It was then, though, that Caroline's carefully laid plans began to go awry.

Over two weeks of playing with Gabe had gotten to Caroline. She would not let a Survivor dream of over two decades get deferred playing someone else's game. And so she took a bite out of her ally with the ferocity of a fish eye at the auction, joining the vote to take him out. True to her skills, though, she was able to clean things up with her dirt-covered number one. And with that, the path to Day 26 looked free, with the next three boots set in stone and away at the Sanctuary. Little did she know that overnight trip would change her game forever. Andy came to the two outsiders with a plan to manufacture a split vote, which he would take advantage of to force a plurality to take out one of the members of the majority. It was a tightrope of an operation, having to navigate an Immunity Challenge, two idols, and a Block-a-Vote advantage. Hearing she would be getting a vote at Tribal Council, Caroline spun the news with her trademark positivity, saying it validates her as a threat. But she learned quickly to be careful what you wish for. Operation: Italy went off without a hitch, as Andy's flip sealed her fate in one of the most stunning moves of the New Era.

Now out of the game, Caroline talks with Parade.com about any warning signs she had in retrospect with Operation: Italy, her choice to turn on Gabe, and how her time on Survivor factors into her childhood desire to not be a "failure."

Related: Read our Survivor 47 pre-game interview with Caroline Vidmar

Obviously, we need to start with what happened at Tribal Council. "Operation: Italy" was almost edited like a movie and, like any good movie with a twist ending, you look back thinking about if there was anything you should have picked up on in the moment. Was that the case for you? Were there any big warning signs in retrospect that Andy would flip?
100%. There were just so many moments where there were little red flags scattered throughout. And what's interesting is that it feels like, especially when your brain is just so malnourished out there, you pick up on, but you don't intellect. I just didn't mentally think of [them] as being as big of red flags as what they were. But going into that Tribal Council, I had a bad gut feeling. I never had a bad gut feeling until that moment. But I just kept going through my head, and I was like, "No." Logically, the way I think what's best for Andy's game, in my opinion, was for him to vote out Genevieve versus me. What made sense was for him to stick to the plan. And so while I knew that there was a lot of risk and there was a lot of calculated risk on my end, I just relied on the knowledge I had. But in reality, I wish I listened to my gut a little bit more genuinely.

What would that have involved had you listened to your gut? Asking Sue to play the idol on you?
Yes. Well, the thing is that it's mind-blowing, because there are so many things we could have done to change the outcome. Sue could have played her idol on me. Rachel could have played her advantage in her Block-a-Vote. We should have just really dictated what the split vote was going to be. But the whole reason we didn't do that was actually because of me. I was the one advocating against all of those things, and the reason being, I personally really viewed this vote as "Andy management." I could tell Andy was really in a position where he wanted to make his mark on the game, especially after we kind of shut him down hard for trying to go for Genevieve during the Kyle vote, harder than what was shown.

I knew that Andy really wanted to feel respected and that he was making a big move. I want that big move to be taking out Genevieve. So when he comes back to camp, and he's like, "Guys, I have this big move," I'm like, "Okay, Andy, we'll do what your big move is." And so it's trying to just appease him. And I was worried, because there's some things that we could do to just guarantee this vote works in our way, but Andy's going to be pissed after. He's going to feel disrespected, like we weren't listening to him, and things are just going to be chaotic and way more unpredictable moving forward. So it was a very calculated risk to choose to advocate against all those things. But I was really doing it to try to give Andy the most agency possible. Because at the end of the day, it actually was tied to my strategy. I want to be the person to help make moves happen, but never be the reason for it. So I was trying to execute the plan exactly how Andy wanted it to so he felt full control and agency. But in reality, behind the scenes, the vote happened because of how I was pushing other people to follow along with the plan. So calculated risk. It didn't work out in my favor. But based on what I knew at the time, I thought it was a worthwhile risk. 

We got a taste of what your endgame would have been had you survived last night. You would have gotten rid of Genevieve, then Sam, then Andy. The interesting factor in that Final Four is Rachel. You were pushing hard to get rid of her during that split Tribal Council, saying she was one of the most dangerous people in the game. But we've seen the past few weeks that you were in a Final Three with her and Sue. So how did she end up becoming such a key part of your endgame?
So some context I'm excited to provide is that Rachel and I were actually in a close alliance ever since Sierra went home. The night Sierra went home, we had a wonderful conversation at night, basically being like, "We actually want to work with each other. We've been on the opposite sides of the votes, but  really get good vibes from each other." And I think my perspective at that time was I always viewed Rachel as a threat, but it was because she's so strategic and smart, and she has a charisma way about her that's so endearing. And I wanted to work with her. That's why I thought she was so threatening, because I could tell other people felt the same way.

But at the end of the day, especially at that point in the early merge, I was really looking for another strategic person to really collaborate with. So after the Sierra vote, and especially after the Sol vote, Rachel became my strategic number one. And so that's why you see that lull where I'm not trying to target her as much is because I'm loving collaborating with her and strategizing with her. We were working fantastically together as well. And so it's one of those things too, where I felt like Rachel was a threat, but when it's a threat working with you, I felt like we were elevating each other's games. I was okay working with her. I was always keeping tabs, which is what you see in the episode. I was never sold on going through the Final Three with her. I was thinking maybe we use Sue's idol to take out Rachel. So I was always wary of her, but I loved working with her.

That's a bit surprising she became your strategic number one, since I imagine that slot would have been filled by Gabe. Indeed, when I talked with him, he had mentioned that the two of you felt you were the only ones who could talk strategy on Tuku. Talk to me about how you built that dynamic, and what caused you to ultimately vote against him.
So Gabe was my first strategic number one. And I have to say, I am so grateful I was on Tuku with him. I loved our dynamic in Tuku. We worked so well together, and it was a beautiful balance of strategically playing things back and forth. It was incredibly collaborative. I loved our chats on Tuku, and I loved the plans that we created together. They never had to be realized because we didn't go to Tribal, but there was a great base there. But as we shifted into the merge–I'll try to keep this short. As we went into the merge, I proposed a plan to Tuku of what we are like in my head. I'm like, "We are a fractured bunch. But let me come up with a plan to allow us to try to work together a little bit more."

One of our plans was we pretend that Gabe is just truly on the bottom. And so we did not talk a lot at the beginning of merge. And when we did talk, it started shifting away from us being very collaborative strategically to, the few times that we talk, it felt more like Gabe was trying to tell me what we were going to do. And when I pushed back and try to have more collaboration, it felt more like Gabe was just thinking what was good for his game and being less open to feedback and other ideas. My whole plan with Gabe was to work with him, and he takes the credit for the move that we make together. And that was fine by me, because I knew it was collaborative. But if it stops becoming collaborative, it actually turns into the reality of Gabe just telling me what to do. That's not the game I want to play, and I was worried he was turning into that. So that's when I made the very conscious decision to get rid of him, when the collaboration stopped.

The third part of that "wounded bird" triangle is Sue. It's clear you two had a very tight personal dynamic. Talk to me about how you were able to bridge that after leaving her out of the Gabe vote.
So in that moment, Sue can be scary! [Laughs.] You've seen what happens if Sue doesn't like you and Sue feels betrayed by you. She's picturing your head on the other side of that coconut, and she is going to town. So I was definitely nervous. People tell you going into Survivor, there's things that you could that you'll just never predict or expect. I would have never expected to have an alliance member like Sue. Sue is as loyal as you could possibly be. I never knew I could truly trust someone to never write my name down. So much so [that] she told everyone she will never write my name down! She refused to ever even acknowledge it. I told her, "Sue, you're allowed to pretend that you want to vote for me." She's like, "No, I only want to introduce it. You're good, Caroline." I'm like, "Okay, I don't know how I feel about that."

But all that to say I knew we had such a solid base and foundation, and I kind of felt like I knew how to speak Sue. In terms of, speak from your heart, wear your heart on your sleeve, talk about how much something means to you and your rationale for why you did something. So I was nervous having that conversation with her. But I'll be honest, I was pretty confident I would be able once I shared my heart with her and the real reasons why I had to go after Gabe when I did–well, most of the reasons why–I knew we would repair our relationship.

You shared all those things with Sue except that she had dirt on her face!
Yes, I did! Every single day. I tried so hard. Rachel did too. Other tribe mates did too. And okay, I would love to clarify this as well. It's not dirt on her face; it's mostly soot. So Sue is incredible, and she would tend to the fire a lot. And the way she would attend to the fire is moving things around in a way where her hands were very sooty. And she would touch her face quite a bit. So we would spend a lot of time trying to scrub it off her face. But it was really caked in there. And there were times too, when she's like, "It's okay, it's fine. We'll leave it." I think she wouldn't have said that if maybe she knew how much was on there. But we tried!

Can I ask a point of clarification? Obviously there was some stuff going around in Rome's exit press about Kyle saying something about you and Sue that would get him "canceled." Kyle told me that it was the "Tweedledee and Tweedledum" comment, but Rome had posted at one point that was not the case, and that he had told you and Sue what the actual comment was. Can you clarify if it was that comment, or something else we weren't privy to?
So I will say there were a lot of middle school insults that were sent to Rome. There was a lot of ammo there in general. And again, Rome did tell Sue and I, and it felt very calculated, very strategic. I did not feel like Rome was saying that out of the goodness of his heart. It was more like, "I'm trying to get you really angry at Kyle." However, behind the scenes, one, we're all starving and angry. So I think sometimes that name calling is how people vent. The other is that right before the merge, I proposed a plan to Tuku–and I'm going to try to be brief about this, because it can get a little in the weeds.

Tuku was falling apart. But I wanted to figure out a fail safe to get us to work together. Because Sue and Kyle were butting heads. Tiyana and Gabe were butting heads. We were shambly. But I really want us to have the opportunity to work together as a five, because it ended up being quite beneficial. So what I proposed is, "We're going to act like the three women are really strong. Gabe, you're on the bottom. Kyle, you're on the bottom. Talk like you're on the bottom. Trash us. Say you don't like us. Really make it seem like we are so not together, we should not be a threat." And so what you don't see in the episode is after everyone disperses, and Sue and I are talking to Kyle alone, we're like, "That's just according to the plan, right?" He's like, "Oh, yeah, absolutely." That's how it works. But again, I think where you start seeing some more emotions from Sue is there was this shaky plan of "act like we're not together," [when], in reality, we're not together. So then it turns into, "Was this just according to the plan?" But as time goes on, you're like, "No, if you keep saying these comments, you think it's more personal." But I learned about Tweedledee and Tweedledum a few days before. I did not care whatsoever.

You talk about wanting to keep the Tukus together, and it was working out until the Final Nine. It should be noted that now three Tukus have gone out in a row. Looking back, how do you think things went wrong for the alliance to the point where Sue is the last one standing?
I'd say at this stage of the game, after Gabe left, it really did not feel like Tuku anymore. It felt like it was Sue and I together. Kyle was someone where in the game. We just did not see eye to eye game wise, and so I really didn't feel like he was a number with me. So I felt like, once Gabe was gone, Tuku was done, honestly. But in terms of where it's all going wrong, it's interesting. Because I think if Gabe had stayed, it would have been Tuku versus the world, and it would have been a lot more of just Tuku dynamics. It's ironic in that Gabe going home makes it Tuku no more, and yet Tuku just keeps getting targeted. But I think it's much more circumstantial, like we happen to have been on Tuku, versus we're going home because we're a threat because of Tuku.

Finally, you talked in last week's episode about growing up with ADHD, and how you felt branded as a failure because you thought in a way different to everyone else. You say, "I feel like I've lived my life just proving to myself I'm not that failure." Some would argue that not winning Survivor would feel like a failure in and of itself. So how do you reconcile that with these lifelong feelings you've had about yourself?
I think the main reason I don't view this vote as a failure is because you have to think about what's the information you had at the time. And with my whole heart and soul, I was trying to analyze Andy as much as I could. And I was like, "Based on the information I have, it makes the most sense for him to go after Genevieve." I was trying to support him in a way where he would also feel like he was making the big move I could tell that he wanted to make. So at the end of the day, what I realized is, you have the information at your disposal, do the best that you think you can with it. And I was like, "I did the best I could with the information I had."

And I think that's what I've learned, too. Growing up, I can be my own harshest critic. I really other people's opinions don't really phase me, for better or for worse. It's all about what my opinion of myself is. And where I think I've grown up and learned is you have to give yourself some grace, realize all the things that you've been able to accomplish and do with like what you have. And at the same point, I feel like, once you stop spending so much time critiquing yourself and being critical of yourself, I feel like growing up, what I would do is I would always put myself in situations to test me to see what I was capable of. Survivor being the epitome of that. This is the absolute hardest, craziest thing I can possibly do. Will I rise to the occasion? And what I'm so grateful for with my Survivor experience is I feel like it's really helped me shift my mindset to be "don't just try to kick yourself down to see if you can stand back up." Instead, realize and think about all the positive things, all the strengths that you have, and put yourself in positions to actualize and realize them. So I'm so grateful for Survivor for really hammering that point home. And that's why I can look at this whole experience with my head held high.

Related: 'Survivor 47's Kyle Ostwald Says Sue Was 'Never Ugly' to Him to His Face