How to help a loved one experiencing postnatal depression

Marie-Claire Dorking
·Contributor
·6-min read

I'm A Celebrity' star Danny Jones has opened up about the experience of watching his wife go through postnatal depression.

The McFly star married model Georgia Horsley in 2014 and they have a six-year-old son, Cooper.

The campmates were talking about the emotional challenges mums and dads face during Thursday night's episode. Oti Mabuse said dads were often left out of the conversation when they become parents, saying: "It's not spoken about because you're not physically going through everything."

"The thing I felt was seeing my wife go through all that was new," an emotional Jones confessed. "We are naturally, we're fixers and when a baby's crying and it wants its mum you're like 'oh okay'. They don't really need you yet, so your job really is to look after the mum."

Jones said looking back his wife was experiencing postnatal depression, but she wasn't aware of it at the time.

Later when asked by Mabuse if he struggled when his wife was going through her struggles he responded: "I wanted to try and fix it and go 'Come on you can do this' and that's not what she needed. What she needed was for me to sit next to her and put an arm around her and tell her 'everything's going to be okay."

Danny Jones, who has opened up to his campmates. (ITV screengrab)
Danny Jones has frequently opened up to his campmates in I'm A Celebrity. (ITV screengrab)

Mabuse added that her husband, Marius Iepure, also struggled to know how to help with her own wellbeing in the early stages of motherhood. “He needed to learn to be there emotionally for me,” she explained, adding that he had “tried to fix” her problems.

Following the conversation fans expressed thanks to Jones and his fellow campmates for shining a light on postnatal mental health.

"Danny spreading awareness on post-natal depression is so important," one viewer wrote on X (formerly Twitter).

"[Danny] has been so open and vulnerable! him talking about mental health and post natal depression is something that is so important!!

"I LOVE this chat that Oti, Coleen, Barry & Danny are having about post natal depression," another added. "It’s interesting hearing how mums deal with it as well as the dads view of not knowing how to help when all they want to do is help."

Recent statistics reveal postnatal depression affects one in 10 new mothers, and it can also affect fathers and partners.

Symptoms include persistent low mood, lack of enjoyment and energy and difficulty looking after yourself and your child, the NHS says.

As Jones revealed postnatal depression can often be hard to recognise. Some parents may avoid talking to family and friends about how they're feeling because they worry they'll be judged for not coping.

The NHS has put together some signs for partners, family and friends to look out for in new parents, which include:

  • frequently crying for no obvious reason

  • having difficulty bonding with their baby, looking after them only as a duty and not wanting to play with them

  • withdrawing from contact with other people

  • speaking negatively all the time and saying that they're hopeless

  • neglecting themselves, such as not washing or changing their clothes

  • losing their sense of humour

  • constantly worrying that something is wrong with their baby, regardless of reassurance

New parents struggling with postnatal depression. (Getty Images)
It can be difficult to know how to support a loved one going through postnatal depression. (Getty Images)

The first few weeks and months after giving birth can be very emotional, but there are some ways you can support a loved one to stay mentally well.

"Those early days of becoming parents can be a difficult time," explains Sally Bunkham, director of communications and partnerships, PANDAS Foundation. "Everything in our life suddenly changes and it can be hard to have a good perspective on how we 'should' feel, especially when there are some unhelpful and unrealistic narratives in society about how we should 'enjoy every moment'."

If your partner needs support with their mental health, the pregnancy and baby charity Tommy's suggests you can help them by:

  • asking them what they need at that time

  • reassuring them that they’re a good parent

  • encouraging them to rest

  • agreeing times when visitors can call

  • asking friends and family to help. For example, by cooking meals, caring for older children or helping with housework

  • encouraging them to get help – from a health professional or a support group

  • talking about what questions you both want to ask at medical appointments.

"It can feel overwhelming to find out your partner or loved one is experiencing postnatal depression but there are many ways that you can support her," a spokesperson from the Association of Post Natal Illness (APNI) tells Yahoo Life UK.

The charity advises first checking the new mum is receiving treatment from the doctor as soon as possible.

"Please do forget any ideas of ‘chivvying’ her out of this illness and accept that she is unwell," the spokesperson continues. "Try to treat her as you would if she had a physical illness with patience, kindness and compassion. She will get better but it can take time."

They also recommend looking after your own wellbeing by asking for help from other family members and friends.

"It's important that all parents and carers have a safe space to be heard and understood," adds Bunkham.

"Charities, such as PANDAS, are there for all parents, carers and their networks and if you are worried about someone, you can also seek support via our free services, with no waiting lists, where you will be supported and signposted where necessary."

There are a number of national support groups that you can contact for advice including:

You can also search for local support groups and find details of national telephone or email support lines on the Maternal Mental Health Alliance website.

Read more about postnatal depression:

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