Meredith Gaudreau Says 'It's Been Really Hard' Watching NHL Season Start After Death of Husband Johnny

Johnny Gaudreau, an 11-year NHL veteran, was killed in a bicycle crash alongside his brother Matthew Gaudreau last month

<p>Meredith Gaudreau/Instagram</p> Meredith and Johnny Gaudreau

Meredith Gaudreau/Instagram

Meredith and Johnny Gaudreau

Meredith Gaudreau says she’s finding it “really hard” to watch the NHL season begin as she and Johnny Gaudreau’s family and friends continue to mourn the late Columbus Blue Jackets player.

Gaudreau died at the age of 31 late last month when he and his brother Matthew Gaudreau, 29, were killed by an alleged drunk driver, who struck the brothers while they were riding bicycles the night before their sister’s wedding.

The brothers were laid to rest at a joint funeral on Sept. 9, where both of their widows gave emotional speeches honoring their late husbands. Both Johnny’s wife Meredith and Matthew’s wife Madeline are pregnant.

On Friday, Meredith expressed her grief in an Instagram post, sharing how difficult it’s been to see NHL players return to the ice this week knowing her husband won’t be out there with them this season.

“It’s been really hard watching hockey start up and seeing how different my life is now,” Meredith wrote in the post. “My whole life was taking care of John and our kids. It’s all I ever wanted."

Related: Johnny Gaudreau's Wife Meredith Announces She's Pregnant with Their 3rd Baby During Funeral

<p>Meredith Gaudreau/Instagram</p> Johnny and Meredith Gaudreau

Meredith Gaudreau/Instagram

Johnny and Meredith Gaudreau

Meredith then mentions Sean Monahan, a close friend and fellow NHL player of Johnny's. The late hockey star, who played for the Calgary Flames for eight seasons before signing with the Columbus Blue Jackets in 2022, had been teammates with Monahan in Calgary and convinced him to sign with Columbus this offseason so they could be reunited on the ice.

"Watching Sean wear CBJ is something I know John always always wanted," Meredith continued. "Noa loves cheering for Uncle Sean too. Wishing 23 a good training camp and can’t wait to cheer you on.”

In another post shortly after, Meredith shared a video clip of an interview with her late husband in which he says being with his family is “the most important thing” in his life. “You can give me any blank check or any amount of money, it’s not going to change for me,” he says in the interview. “I’m big into family, my family’s super close, and that’s the most important thing to me.”

Meredith captioned the post, “my perfect husband.”

“I want to say that watching these videos has me feeling so thankful but to be honest I never once didn’t feel like the luckiest most grateful girl in the world since the day I met him,” she wrote. “Videos like this is why. I love you so much John. Thank you for being the perfect husband.”

Meredith and Johnny shared two children together: daughter Noa, who turns 2 in October, and son Johnny, who is 7 months old.

During her husband’s memorial service earlier this month, Meredith announced that she is also expecting another child with her late husband next year.

"Noa, our oldest, hasn't even turned 2 yet,” Meredith said. “In less than three years of marriage, we've created a family of five. It doesn't even sound possible, but I look at it as the ultimate blessing. How lucky am I to be the mother of John's three babies? Our last one being a blessing and so special despite these difficult circumstances."

Related: Johnny Gaudreau’s Toddler Daughter Practices Hockey in Sweet Video Weeks After the NHL Star's Death

<p>Christian Petersen/Getty; Mike Stobe/NHLI via Getty </p> Johnny and Matthew Gaudreau

Christian Petersen/Getty; Mike Stobe/NHLI via Getty

Johnny and Matthew Gaudreau

The Blue Jackets begin play on Monday afternoon with their first preseason game against the Buffalo Sabres. The team announced plans this week to honor Gaudreau, an 11-year NHL veteran, including stickers and patches players will wear on their jerseys throughout the season.

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The players also told reporters at the team’s media day on Wednesday that they plan to set up Gaudreau’s locker at every game this season – both home and away.

“He's going to be with us,” the team’s head coach Dean Evason said. “He's going to be a presence."

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