Men Got Candid About Sleeping With Women Who Were "Taken," And It's All Very Eye-Opening

Reddit user Any_Floor_4178 asked the men of the community, "Guys who've slept with other guys' girlfriends: Did you feel bad afterward?"

Diane Lane and Olivier Martinez in "Unfaithful"
20th Century Fox

These men revealed what it's actually like having sex with people who are "taken." Their experiences were all pretty different, and very eye-opening.

Man on "90 Day Fiancé" saying, "It was actually my father's woman"

So, here are some men who've had sex with other guys' girlfriends:

Note: Some submissions were pulled from this Reddit thread by user TangerineKandy.

1."I was around 22 years old (a horny college kid who matched with a woman 20 years older than me). She was very upfront about being married and hadn’t had sex in a year. I’ve always been attracted to older women, so I really didn’t care if she was married or not. 'It’s not my marriage.' We fucked for two years in secret, and it was the greatest sex I’ve ever had still to this day. I ended up breaking it off because I feel for her, she wouldn’t leave him, and it was becoming too much for me emotionally. But looking back at it with a strictly physical view, I don’t regret it at all."


2."I met this married woman at a coworking space on an away trip. It exploded into a full-blown passionate romance for a few days (I was also in a relationship that had issues). She was a very hot woman with a dark nature who needed validation. I also needed validation and was incredibly horny and somewhat inexperienced. She kept talking to me and found me interesting, which led me to be more carefree and just romancing her. The sex and chemistry were incredible, and the whole thing produced an excitement of epic proportions. I was doing something so wrong, and took her away from another man and family as 'a toy.' Two people in pure lust and passion, forgetting everything about their roles and expectations. It was easy to surrender to pure animal instincts. She did so many things to me — it was wild seeing her transform from a mom and an office worker into an absolute pornstar."


A man and woman share an intimate moment in bed
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3."I slept with [a married woman] who was in an open relationship. We matched through a dating app, and she was the first person I had sex with after getting out of a long-term relationship that very much hurt. So, it was nice to get laid and have someone to have physical intimacy again with. There were clear boundaries, knowing it wouldn’t go any further than sex. It was a bit weird when I found out her husband had 'approved,' and I even met him a couple of times, like out in public when they were together. The only two rules were if they were with their kids and we saw each other in public to just ignore them. I also wasn’t allowed to scratch or rub her back when we weren't having sex. It was a bit weird at first, but it happened a couple of times a month for half a year or so, and then we kinda just mutually moved on."


4."She came onto me hard. I was horny and alone, so I went with it and enjoyed it a lot. But I'm a relationship person, so I started to yearn for something more. I wanted her to leave her husband for me, and while she had a huge crush on me, she couldn't do it. Looking back, our relationship would have been doomed from the start. I wouldn't have ever trusted her. After that, I've steered clear of married women and given them the cold shoulder even before anything could get started. I think cheating is repulsive, and I cannot be an enabler for someone doing it. When I see a ring, I turn myself off instantly. This goes for anyone in a relationship, of course, but married women are easier to spot from the get-go."


A close-up of a woman's hand with white nail polish, wearing a diamond ring on her ring finger
Kanawa_studio / Getty Images/iStockphoto

5."I was at such a low point in my life that I was willing to take any affection that came to me. There was a married woman at work who would hang over me all the time. I knew it was wrong, but I let it happen. I can make jokes about how she would be making out with me in the manager's office, and then her husband would come around, and she would kiss him right after. Or how I would lay sweaty and naked on his side of the bed while he worked. It honestly led to me having much better self-esteem. I thought, 'If this woman is ready to ruin her marriage and life over me, I must be worth something.' It made me think I was worthy, which led me to find my wife. I look back, and I am ashamed about it, but it got me to where I am today."


6."I was 29, and I met this married woman with two kids at my gym. She and I developed an Instagram messaging relationship that got flirty real fast. She told me pretty early on that she was in an abusive marriage and wanted to leave him, but was waiting for the right time. We started talking more and more, and in the gym, we had to hide that we talked so much. We’d smile and say 'hi,' but it was difficult to keep my eyes off of her just because of how attractive she was. Just an absolute fox from top to bottom — hair and nails always done, dressed nicely, and just looked great. One day I told her I couldn’t wait any longer and wanted to sleep with her, she felt similarly, so we set up a day where we’d meet that week. At the time I was still living at home, so the only logical place to fuck was my car (and that we did). Right from the start, it was the hottest sex not just because it was forbidden, but because her body was just amazing."

"That continued on for six months. We would usually meet up, fuck in the car near the gym, and then each go to the gym five minutes apart to not be obvious. Once we both called out of work and booked a hotel and spent the entire day just having the hottest sex and eating room service. It was awesome.

But, like, all good things, they must come to an end. I ended up realizing I was falling for her and did not want to get wrapped up in everything, so I ended it. I’m so glad I did because her life was even more complicated soon after."


A woman and a shirtless man casually chat at a gym
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7."I'm gonna be really honest here: For a long time, I did not care at all. If she wanted to fuck around with me, fuck it — not my sin, not my problem. She's either got problems with her guy or she doesn't take her relationship seriously — I'm not fixing either of those problems, but I can fuck. So this kind of shitty behavior on my part went on for many years. I've slept with quite a few women who were in various stages of relationships (some more serious than others), and I left a wake of destruction. Relationships failed when I came around, and the women were left to pick up the pieces while I moved on and didn't give a fuck."

"I don't know why it took me so long to realize that I was a major contributor to all this emotional devastation — as the person enabling the cheating, I did not have clean hands. I should've cared about what the guy felt and should've been aware that I'm not fucking in a vacuum.

There were real consequences for her and for him, and it was enormously selfish and wrong to think that none of those consequences mattered because they didn't impact me directly."


8."I was in my early twenties working at a restaurant. My coworker asked me out, went out for drinks, and then did three more times after that. One time she had a flat when pulling into our workplace parking lot (we were both working that night). I told her I'd help her put the spare on it when our shift ended. As I was undoing the lug nuts, a car pulled up next to hers. A dude got out and said 'he's got it,' and that he appreciated me trying to help his wife. I froze. All I could do was say 'okay,' told both of them to have a good night, and left. We slept together on their bed, FFS 🤦."


9."I worked at Walmart for a little bit. I was 20, and she had just turned 30. She'd make some flirty comments to me for a little while. I eventually put in my two weeks because I had gotten another retail job with better pay. After that, she started being more clear with her intent, and we would spend our lunch breaks together. We never had sex, but we did fool around some. She started having second thoughts and I didn’t want to pressure her at all since I knew nothing about why she was cheating on her husband (I was kind of scared to ask her). But being a horny 20-year-old I didn’t really care."

"After I moved jobs, we just kind of stopped talking (which was certainly for the better). I got curious and snooped on her Facebook page one day last year, and it looked like she was happy with her husband and family. So, I figure she decided not to go through with it with anyone else."


Two people smiling and enjoying time in a pool, embracing closely
Peter Cade / Getty Images

10."Yeah, I did it one time (sadly, I knew she was in a relationship). I had just gotten out of a long-term relationship myself that ended because my significant other cheated on me, so a part of me feels like it was some sort of mental revenge. It was kind of like an 'I’ve been wronged, so I don’t care if I wrong someone else' sort of thing. The next morning, I felt like complete shit, and I still feel awful about it."


11."It was mutually agreed upon between me, her, and her husband. We're all friends, and he gets a thrill from watching me fuck his wife. He isn't the most 'well-endowed,' so he enjoys watching me satisfy his wife because he's very self-conscious about her needs not being met."


12."I have a coworker who says, and I quote: 'I don't care if I'm with a cheater — that's her fault. She's the one who chose to cheat, and I'll be the other guy without any guilt.' Personally, I would NEVER be the other man knowingly in that situation. I'm not going to be the person enabling the cheating. I'm not going to put another guy through that heartbreak."


A man in a suit and bow tie adjusts the strap of a woman's red dress on her shoulder
Monstarrr_ / Getty Images/iStockphoto

13."I was that guy when I was in high school and in my early twenties. I wouldn’t actively pursue someone who was in a relationship, but if I met a woman at a bar or a party and she came onto me and I found out later she had a boyfriend, that was her problem — not mine. It was the 'It’s not my responsibility to keep you faithful' type of mindset. I wouldn’t continue seeing them after, but I wouldn’t lose any sleep over it, either. I’m in my late thirties now, and looking back, I realize it was an awful way to behave. I’m lucky nothing bad came of it, but at the time I didn’t care."


14."I've been with three women who were cheating on their boyfriends with me, and I knew about it (they told me they were in a relationship, or I already knew they were). I was young back then and thought it was cool that I was able to 'steal' their girlfriends. I remember one time, one woman and I were lying in my bed naked and she was on the phone with her boyfriend, talking like nothing's wrong. She said she loved him while stroking my dick, when literally not even 10 minutes earlier, I had finished inside her. Again, back then I thought that was peak performance — I was proud of myself. After many years, I think back to those moments with so much regret (that one specifically — it's just so excessively cruel when you think about it)."


A couple lies intimately in bed with the man gently holding the woman's shoulder
Delmaine Donson / Getty Images

15."I had an ex who told me that when he was in college, he met this woman who would lightly flirt with him, and he took it upon himself to really flirt back. Well, one day, things eventually escalated. They were at her house, he saw the photos of her husband and her kids, and he said, 'Fuck it — I don't care.' They had an affair for two years until she dropped him, and that's when he said she became a 'slut,' 'cheater,' etc. — I asked him if it was because she dumped him, and he said it was."


16."I was a scumbag. She wasn't 'satisfied,' and that's how I justified it at the time. I knew exactly what I was doing, and I didn't feel bad at the time. But now it's one of those things that I wish I could go back and do differently. Even if he never found out, it still bugs me."


17.And finally, "I used to screw a girl whose boyfriend was a complete shithead (which I observed in person several times). When she and I met, we agreed it was just sex and would never go further. She was honest about her man the entire time (I was hesitant at first), and she invited me to come to a restaurant where they were going to have dinner that night with the promise I'd see how shitty he was (and I did). After that, I thought: 'Fuck this dude.' Did I ever feel bad? No — but I would have if this was some innocent guy (I should add this was an arranged marriage that the family decided to 'try out' for two years before committing). She hated him, but kept being told by her family that she would 'learn to love him.' Her opinion didn't matter, and she had no means of escape — so she did what she wanted behind closed doors. I just so happened to be the one she wanted to do."

"That friend-with-benefits relationship lasted for six years until I met my now-fiancé. Once I realized how much I liked my fiancé, I told my friends-with-benefits partner we had to end things. And because of that, she congratulated me.

My fiancé knows about her, and actually invited her to our wedding because (and I didn't know this until recently) they talk online ALL THE TIME."


A man and woman are passionately kissing on a bed, with the man on top
Miodrag Ignjatovic / Getty Images

Note: Some stories have been edited for length and/or clarity.