Yahoo Lifestyle Keep Your Pup Playful and Happy—9 Ways To Fill Your Dog’s Emotional Cup, According to Pet Experts
Social media is full of fodder on metaphorical cups. But it's hard to get through a scroll session without a pastel-colored or beige quote tile reminding us we "can't pour from an empty cup."
The phrase may feel as passé as the one about putting your own oxygen mask on first, but it has merit: You have to care for yourself before you can care for others. But when your cup is full, how about gauging how much is left in your dog's? In this article, experts share why it's important for pet parents to consider, and explain how to fill your dog's emotional cup.
"Dogs are emotional beings, just as we are," says Sarah-Anne Reed, a consulting holistic dog trainer at Healthy Paws Pet Insurance and owner of Pack Dynamics in Bend, Oregon. "If dogs are not feeling emotionally supported, it can cause a lot of anxiety, leading to behavioral issues."
A veterinarian agrees.
"A happy dog is a well-behaved dog," says Dr. Judy Morgan, DVM, CVA, CVCP, CVFT, a veterinarian and founder/CEO of Dr. Judy Morgan's Naturally Healthy Pets.
We may call our dogs our babies—and they are—but Reed and Dr. Morgan say refilling their cups is a bit different than a human's. How can you refill your dog's emotional cup? The two spilled all the details.
Related: Study Finds Dogs Have an Emotional Response When Humans Cry
Do Dogs Have Emotional Cups?
They sure do. "Every dog is unique, meaning their everyday needs, personality, coping ability and emotional needs vary," Reed says. "However, every dog, like every human, wants to feel acknowledged, accepted as they are and safe and secure within their family relationships."
That said, a dog's emotional well-being differs from a human's.
"Dogs are a separate species and need emotional support in different ways than humans," Reed says.
There's also a language barrier. Sure, your dog may understand "sit," but they can't follow a heart-to-heart talk (though they may tilt their head and open their big, brown eyes even wider).
Cute as it is, "You can't talk with them to find out why they feel 'out of balance' or explain how their behavior affects you," Reed says.
And those differences—and others—can actually be draining for a canine.
"We ask dogs to live in our environment and follow our rules, often overlooking what is natural for a dog," Dr. Morgan explains. "Dogs dig, chase, bark, chew, herd, guard and interact socially when following their natural instincts. We, on the other hand, do not want them to dig, chase, bark, chew or guard us from the delivery person."
Bottom line?
"When we stop them from doing what comes naturally to them, we take away from their emotional cup," Dr. Morgan says.
You may have a massive case of parent guilt. But don't worry—there are ways to keep your sofa and yard intact while keeping your dog's emotional cup full.
Related: 26 Calm Dog Breeds That Make the Best Couch Potato Companions
Signs Your Dog's Emotional Cup Is Empty vs. Full
First, it's important for pet parents to recognize when a dog has an empty emotional cup or a full one.
Dr. Morgan says signs your pup's cup needs a refill include:
Restlessness
Over-excitement during interactions with humans or dogs
Excessive barking
Over-protectiveness
Fear
Shutting down
Reed says a dog with a full cup will:
Refrain from getting up to follow caretakers whenever they leave the room
Relax and settle easily
Be more playful
Enjoy spending time alone, even in another room
Related: Sweet Rescue Dog Steps Up to Become Mom to 5 New Foster Kittens
9 Ways To Fill Your Dog's Emotional Cup
1. Fill Yours
Here comes the oxygen mask line. But seriously, dogs pick up on our moods.
"If you are feeling emotionally drained due to your dog's behavior, it causes your dog to feel even more stressed because you don't have the confident, grounded energy that they need to be able to relax," Reed explains. "It's essential to recognize that self-care and keeping our emotional cup full [will] greatly impact your dog and their well-being."
Meditate, do yoga, journal, take a walk, see a therapist and set boundaries—whatever self-care looks like for you, do it. Your dog will benefit from it.
2. Have Mindfulness Moments
Instagrammable, orchestrated adventures and organized playdates are great for your dog—and Reed and Dr. Morgan recommend them. But Reed says one of the most important things you can do for your dog may not rack up Instagram likes, but it'll leave your pet feeling whole.
"The best way to fill your dog's emotional cup is to take time every day to sit quietly and be present with your dog," Reed says. "Turn off the TV, put your phone down, enjoy simply being with your dog and talk to them from your heart."
They may not understand exactly what you're saying. However, they will notice the tone of your voice and your undivided attention and affection. Reed says it's a game-changer.
"When dogs feel a sense of acceptance from us, they can relax and know they don't need to worry about being abandoned," she says. "If you are considering rehoming your dog because of their behavior or you are just feeling overwhelmed and frustrated with them, your dog can sense this, and it causes their stress to increase significantly."
And the stress continues a vicious cycle.
"[It] causes them to try and cope with their anxiety and usually, the behaviors that you find annoying will get worse because that's how they demonstrate their fear," Reed says.
3. Provide Off-Leash Time
Leashes are great tools for keeping pets safe during physical activity. But Dr. Morgan recommends giving a dog time for free movement in a safe space, such as a fenced-in yard or dog park.
"If you do not have a safe place for them to do that outside, then set up obstacle courses or interactive play areas inside," Dr. Morgan suggests.
4. Toys and Treats
Make playtime interactive and challenging (in a fun way). This gives your pet plenty of physical and mental stimulation.
"Throw toys so they can chase," Dr.Morgan suggests. "Hide treats so they can spend time sniffing and hunting. Puzzle toys are readily available which require dogs to search and find."
5. Take Them to the Beach (Or Fake It)
The beach is a fantastic spot to fill a dog's emotional cup. While they probably won't build a sand castle with you, they may love playing in the sand.
"Digging is a natural instinct for dogs," Dr. Morgan says. "The beach is a great place to dig in the sand and splash in the water," Dr. Morgan says.
Not everyone has easy access to a shore point, but don't let it stop you from making a splash with your pet.
"If you don't live near the beach, fill a small child's plastic pool with water or dirt for splashing and digging," Dr. Morgan says.
6. Remember Their Age
Care isn't one-size-fits-all with humans or dogs. Reed says age can factor into what makes a dog happy.
"Puppies love to play with toys and interact with us, but they get tired quickly, so playtime needs to be short," Reed says. "If puppies get overstimulated, they tend to make poor choices, just like toddlers. A senior pup...usually slows down and may enjoy activities but a bit slower key than before...they have less stamina."
Reed says to watch and observe your dog and choose activities that they seem to enjoy during whatever season of life they're in.
7. Plan a Play Date
Dogs are social beings. A play date may be in order if they get along with other dogs.
"Play dates with other sociable dogs can be a valuable way to allow your dog to interact with a pack," Dr. Morgan shares.
8. Teach Your Dog Something New
Dogs of any age can learn new tricks—in fact, they may crave a lesson or two.
"Dogs love to learn new things," Reed says. "Whether you help them improve their recall, leash walking or teach them a new trick, like shake or roll over, the point is that you are having fun together."
Reed recommends keeping training short and full of positive reinforcement. Your commands should also be concise and consistent. Bonus: The training sessions may also fill your cup.
"It's so fun to watch their wheels turn as they grasp a new idea and feel so proud of themselves," Reed says.
9. Love Your Dog Unconditionally
If you do one thing, make it this one.
"Understand that often the behaviors they are displaying are natural for them," Morgan says. "Provide them with the creative outlets to keep their emotional cup full."
