Insulting your partner everyday could benefit relationship, research suggests

Caroline Allen
Contributor
The new study has proven that roasting your partner makes your relationship stronger. [Photo: Getty]

Couples who roast each other share a stronger bond, new research has found.

That’s right, bringing a bit of light-hearted banter into your relationship could bring you closer together.

It seems quite harsh to consider teasing your partner on a daily basis, but the research is talking about the little quirks that you love most about the person.

For example, laughing at the way your partner gets the words of songs wrong might be a funny little in-joke that strengthens the bond.

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Researchers at Appalachian State University found that couples who “roast each other daily” have a longer and happier relationship than those who don’t.

That’s because it helps the partner who’s being teased to feel “seen”.

It might go against all of our natural instincts, but when it’s done in a good natured way it can help you form a deeper connection.

Speaking about the research, couples psychotherapist, Christine Elvin, said: “There are ways and means of teasing your partner and I think it’s something that should come naturally.

“Having fun and laughing with your partner is one of the best things you can do to strengthen your bond. For you, that might not be through in-jokes or teasing, but everybody has their way.”

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The ability to giggle at each other is certainly one way to celebrate each others quirks in a relaxed way, as long as the other person is into it.

“The idea of ‘roasting’ each other is more about laughing together rather than laughing at one person specifically. It’s looking at little quirks of people’s personalities and shining a light on them.

“In many cases, it’s the quirks that your partner will love about you the most because that’s what makes you uniquely you.” Christine went on to say.

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We all need a bit of light-hearted relief in our lives, and if that means laughing at the way our spouses insist on putting ketchup on everything, then that seems like a good way of getting it.

It can also be quite a nice way to touch on a subject you want to highlight without getting into a full-blown argument about it.

After all, when you’re living with somebody or around somebody a lot, there will naturally be things that niggle at you.

Bringing these up in a good-natured way will reduce the need for an argument.

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But, how do you know if your spouse is into it?

“You’ll know by their reaction,” Christine explains, “if they don’t laugh along or if you sense that’s not their type of humour it doesn’t matter. There are plenty of ways to bond with your partner.

“Most importantly, it has to be a collaboration between you and your partner. You should be the ultimate team.”

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