Scroll down to read the latest batch.
Self-confidence is my four year old asking me to turn off the ceiling fan so he can show me how high he jumps.
— Henpecked Hal (@HenpeckedHal) July 1, 2020
"Sorry I don't make the rules" I say blatantly lying to my child about a rule I just made up.
— Avocado Mama (@HeatherStenwall) July 2, 2020
Let’s get married and have kids so instead of relaxing on the beach you can keep sand out of their mouth while I blow up a raft and they ask if there is a pool.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) July 1, 2020
A surprising amount of parenting is bribing your kids with things you don’t want to do, then breathing a sigh of relief when they mess it up so you don’t have to deliver.
— Arianna Bradford (@TheNYAMProject) June 28, 2020
After ten do you tell your child to go to sleep or do you scream it
— WTFDAD (@daddydoubts) July 2, 2020
“Hmmm, I guess I’ll have that”
- My 10yo after I told him what I was making for dinner like he’s got a choice in the matter
— Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) July 2, 2020
If you want to know what you really look like hand your phone to a 5-year-old to take a picture.
— mark (@TheCatWhisprer) June 29, 2020
3-year-old: mama why do people get married?
Me: well, when two people love each other very much it can be a good thing to do for tax purposes.
— Felicia Day (@feliciaday) July 1, 2020
No one warned me how much of parenting is sitting quietly with your stomach in your throat, watching your toddler literally jump from new heights and try new risky things
— Not Another Pinterest Mom (@snarkymomtobe) July 2, 2020
A dark day for parents is when their child learns what "hypocrite" means.
— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) June 29, 2020