Yahoo Lifestyle "He Looks Like Somebody's Dad": My 15-Year-Old Daughter Rated Teen Heartthrobs From The '80s, '90s, And '00s, And It's Just Too Funny
Hi, I'm Mike, and this is my 15-year-old daughter Annie.
Recently, I asked Annie who the teen heartthrobs are for her generation (apparently, Jacob Elordi and Timothée Chalamet get high marks). That got me thinking...what would she think about the teen heartthrobs from the '80s, '90s, and '00s? So I decided to ask her. Here's what she had to say:
1.Kirk Cameron
WHO IS HE? The star of the hit '80s sitcom Growing Pains and movies like Like Father Like Son.
ANNIE: "Noooo. He looks like a teacher. You know, the kind who tries to be friends with all the kids."
SWIPE RIGHT? No.
SCORE: 5/10
2.Rob Lowe
WHO IS HE? The Brat Pack star of Oxford Blues and St. Elmo's Fire.
ANNIE: "I feel like I know this guy somehow. I don't like his black hair. It doesn't suit him, and I don't like the little stubble thing he has going on. But he has potential."
MIKE: Did you just say Rob Lowe has...potential?
ANNIE: "If his hair was different."
MIKE: "Rob Lowe?"
ANNIE: "Yes."
MIKE: "What about his eyes?"
ANNIE: "They're good. Wait, is he Sodapop from The Outsiders? If so he looks good in that but kind of weird in this picture."
SWIPE RIGHT? Yes.
SCORE: 7/10
WHO IS HE? In the '80s, he starred on Kids Incorporated and Saved by the Bell.
ANNIE: "No. No! What is this guy? The mullet is a no!"
MIKE: "He is pretty buff."
ANNIE: "Yeah, but it doesn't make up for the mullet."
SWIPE LEFT? No.
SCORE: 6/10
4.Mark-Paul Gosselaar
WHO IS HE? The star of Saved by the Bell. Later, he was on NYPD Blue.
ANNIE: "He looks like he's rich and everyone knows about it. Like, he won't shut up about it. I can hear him saying, 'My father will hear about this!'"
MIKE: "OK, but is he attractive?"
ANNIE: "I guess."
SWIPE RIGHT? No.
SCORE: 6.5/10
5.Michael Schoeffling
WHO IS HE? He won hearts as the object of Molly Ringwald's affection in the John Hughes classic Sixteen Candles.
ANNIE: "He looks OK. He kind of just looks like...a guy. His face is a little pointy. Swipe right to keep my options open."
SWIPE RIGHT? Yes.
SCORE: 8/10
6.Corey Haim
WHO IS HE? One of the Coreys (alongside Corey Feldman), they starred in movies like The Lost Boys and License to Drive.
ANNIE: "No! That's literally so bad. Swipe left! What are those cat ears? He just looks like some guy I'd have to sit next to in math class. He's just normal looking."
SWIPE RIGHT? No.
SCORE: 4/10
7.Ralph Macchio
WHO IS HE? An '80s icon for playing Daniel in The Karate Kid trilogy. He was also in My Cousin Vinny and, more recently, Cobra Kai.
ANNIE: "He has rizz with Ali in The Karate Kid. He's a little small, but he's cute."
SWIPE RIGHT? Yes.
SCORE: 8/10
8.Christian Slater
WHO IS HE? The heartthrob who annoyed adults by seemingly doing a Jack Nicholson impression in movies like Heathers and Gleaming the Cube.
ANNIE: "Is he the guy from Heathers?"
MIKE: "Yes."
ANNIE: "He looks like he would have a middle part and longer hair, but he doesn't. So that's minus a few points. You know, he looks like he would be into birds."
MIKE: "Why do you say that?"
ANNIE: "Because he kind of looks like a kid at my school who is really into birds."
MIKE: "Back in the day the girls at my school were really into him."
ANNIE: "Sure."
Swipe right? No.
SCORE: 6.5/10
9.Tom Cruise
WHO IS HE? Probably the biggest male star of the '80s in hits like Top Gun and Rain Man.
ANNIE: "He's overrated. I feel like everyone likes him, and he's not THAT good-looking. I think he's kind of tiny. He has a good face, but everything else is meh."
SWIPE RIGHT? Yes.
SCORE: 7/10
10.River Phoenix
WHO IS HE? The Academy Award-nominated actor from Stand by Me, Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (he played young Indy), and Running on Empty.
ANNIE: "Definitely a swipe right, but his hair is too long. If he cut his hair, he'd look good. I mean, the hair is good, but he'd look better with shorter hair."
SWIPE RIGHT? Yes.
SCORE: 8.5/10
11.George Michael
WHO IS HE? Half of the English duo Wham! (behind '80s hits like "Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go" and "Last Christmas"). He later had a successful solo career.
ANNIE: "He looks weird. Evil. But it's kind of working. Dunno. I'll give him a seven but swipe left."
MIKE: "How can you give a seven but swipe left?"
ANNIE: "I can appreciate it but not want it."
SWIPE RIGHT? No.
SCORE: 7/10
12.Patrick Swayze
WHO IS HE? The versatile star of Dirty Dancing, Ghost, and Road House.
ANNIE: "Ooh, I like this guy! He's so buff. He's also in The Outsiders. He kind of has weird looking ears, but other than that he's good."
MIKE: "Do you like guys who can dance?"
ANNIE: "Oh, he's in that dancing movie, right?"
MIKE: "Yeah. Dirty Dancing."
ANNIE: "I haven't seen it. But if he dances that's...interesting."
SWIPE RIGHT? Yes.
SCORE: 9/10
13.Emilio Estevez
WHO IS HE? Brother to Charlie Sheen (another '80s fave), he starred in Young Guns (as Billy the Kid) and The Breakfast Club.
ANNIE: "Is that guy also in The Outsiders?"
MIKE: "Yeah. That movie really made an impression on you, huh?"
ANNIE: "I thought he was the least good-looking guy in The Outsiders. He looks like someone's cousin."
SWIPE RIGHT? No.
SCORE: 6/10
14.Jonathan Taylor Thomas (JTT)
WHO IS HE? Randy on the hit sitcom Home Improvement and the voice of young Simba in The Lion King.
MIKE: "So this guy was exactly your age in this photo."
ANNIE: "Um, I like the dog he's holding, so that gives him extra points. He has good eyes."
MIKE: "Pretend he's a guy in your class."
ANNIE: "Well, then everyone would like him so I wouldn't. But if nobody knew him except me, then I would like him. Hair is good. Eyes are good."
SWIPE RIGHT? Yes.
SCORE: 8/10
15.Leonardo DiCaprio
WHO IS HE? The Growing Pains actor-turned-movie star behind Romeo + Juliet and Titanic.
ANNIE: "OK, he looks good in Titanic, but he's not as good-looking as everyone says he is. He's, like, overrated. But he's still good."
SWIPE RIGHT? Yes.
SCORE: 7.5/10
16.Devon Sawa
WHO IS HE? He starred in a number of movies in the '90s but made his biggest impression as Casper in his human form in Casper.
ANNIE: "He looks like Ellen."
MIKE: "Ellen?!"
ANNIE: "Actually, he looks like he's just Ken. Not for me."
SWIPE RIGHT? No.
SCORE: 6/10
17.Dante Basco
WHO IS HE? He made waves in the '90s as Rufio in Steven Spielberg's Hook.
ANNIE: "He looks better in the photo on the left than the other one, but what is he wearing in it?"
MIKE: "It was a Peter Pan movie. He was playing a lost boy, so that's what is going on with the costume."
ANNIE: "OK, say you mixed the photos, putting his face from the left photo onto the outfit from the one on the right, I'd be interested."
SWIPE RIGHT? Yes.
SCORE: 7/10
18.Joey Lawrence
WHO IS HE? The follicly-blessed (at least in the '90s) sitcom star of Blossom and Brotherly Love.
ANNIE: "What is going on with that shirt thing here? Why wear a shirt if it isn't even working? He thinks that fits?"
MIKE: "Maybe he just went to the gym. I don't know."
ANNIE: "He's OK. But the whole shirt thing is still giving me the ick. Why does his hat say 'Whoa!'?"
MIKE: "That was his catchphrase."
ANNIE: "Why would he say that?"
MIKE: "Like if something surprising happened on his TV show he'd go, 'Whoa!'"
ANNIE: "And people liked that?"
MIKE: "Let's move on."
SWIPE RIGHT? No.
SCORE: 6.5/10
19.Freddie Prinze Jr.
WHO IS HE? The star of She's All That and I Know What You Did Last Summer.
ANNIE: "No, no. I don't like that. His mouth is huge, and his face is small."
SWIPE RIGHT? No.
SCORE: 5.5/10
20.Rider Strong
WHO IS HE? He played Shawn on the popular Boy Meets World.
ANNIE: "He looks like the guy from Cobra Kai but with different hair. Does he actually play the guitar or is it a prop?"
MIKE: "Um, let's say he actually plays it."
ANNIE: "Then I'd swipe right."
MIKE: "You think he's handsome?"
ANNIE: "Sure. But I don't like his hair."
SWIPE RIGHT? Yes.
SCORE: 7.5/10
21.Will Smith
WHO IS HE? In the '90s, he was the titular star of The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air.
ANNIE: "Will Smith! He slapped the crap out of that guy, uh..."
MIKE: "Chris Rock."
ANNIE: "Yeah, him. No, I don't see the hype. To me, he looks like the genie from Aladdin, and that's all I can see."
SWIPE RIGHT? No.
SCORE: 6/10
22.Luke Perry
WHO IS HE? He played Dylan McKay on Beverly Hills, 90210, and inspired millions of teenage boys to grow ill-advised long sideburns.
ANNIE: "I feel like I know him."
MIKE: "I think he was the dad on one of the shows you've watched?"
ANNIE: "He has big ears and not enough hair to cover them. He looks like he's concerned about something."
MIKE: "OK. But do you think he's handsome?"
ANNIE: "Sure."
MIKE: "Come on! Look at the bone structure! And the hair!"
ANNIE: "Sounds like you'd swipe right."
SWIPE RIGHT? Yes.
SCORE: 7/10
23.Jason Priestley
WHO IS HE? He played Brandon Walsh on Beverly Hills, 90210, and also helped to inspire the long sideburns madness (oh, and dress shirts unbuttoned almost all the way down).
ANNIE: "No. His eyes are scaring me. He looks like he would stare into my soul."
SWIPE RIGHT? No.
SCORE: 6/10
24.Brad Pitt
WHO IS HE? One of the biggest movie stars of the decade, in movies like Se7en and Fight Club.
ANNIE: "Oh. I think I've seen him when he's older. I feel like he just looks like some guy. Like someone's dad."
MIKE: "You think that Brad Pitt just looks like some guy? Like someone's dad?"
ANNIE: "Yeah. Like I would say he's attractive, but...not."
MIKE: "How do you judge the boys at your school? Are they all, like, ones and twos?"
ANNIE: "Maybe that's why I don't think anyone at my school is good."
SWIPE RIGHT? Yes.
SCORE: 7.5/10
25.Ashton Kutcher
WHO IS HE? He made his mark in the '90s as Kelso on That '70s Show.
ANNIE: "He looks like he'd be emo but missed his calling. I don't like the butt chin."
SWIPE RIGHT? No.
SCORE: 6/10
26.Heath Ledger
WHO IS HE? A future Academy Award-winner who captured hearts in 10 Things I Hate About You.
ANNIE: "His hair looks weird in this picture, but it looks good in 10 Things I Hate About You."
MIKE: "Beyond his hair...any comments?"
ANNIE: "Um, his face is pretty symmetrical."
SWIPE RIGHT? Yes.
SCORE: 8/10
27.Ethan Hawke
WHO IS HE? The Gen X heartthrob in Reality Bites and Before Sunrise.
ANNIE: "Oh, I know that guy. He's the guy in that movie—"
MIKE: "Reality Bites?"
ANNIE: "That, too, but The Black Phone. I like him. I think he's chill. I don't usually like facial hair, but he pulls it off."
SWIPE RIGHT? Yes.
SCORE: 8/10
28.Ryan Phillippe
WHO IS HE? The one-time Mr. Reese Witherspoon starred in the teen faves I Know What You Did Last Summer and Cruel Intentions.
ANNIE: "He's OK. I guess I like his eyes. Actually, I don't like how his bottom lip is big but his top lip is small."
MIKE: "You're very judgmental."
ANNIE: "Well, the task is to judge people, right?"
MIKE: "It is! You're right, you're right!"
SWIPE RIGHT? Yes.
SCORE: 7.5/10
29.Paul Walker
WHO IS HE? He made teens sit up in their seat and ask "Who is THAT?" in She's All That and Varsity Blues.
ANNIE: "Ugh, the scary eyes! He's OK. He kind of looks like a lizard, but he's OK."
SWIPE RIGHT? No.
SCORE: 6/10
30.Usher
WHO IS HE? The R&B star released his debut album at just 15 in 1994.
ANNIE: "He looks like he has rizz. Yeah, I like it."
SWIPE RIGHT? Yes.
SCORE: 8.5/10
31.Joshua Jackson and James Van Der Beek
WHO ARE THEY? They were the stars of the WB's teen drama Dawson's Creek.
ANNIE: "They look like Beavis and Buttface or whoever. The guy on the left also looks like Mr. Bean. They both have an off-putting vibe about them. I don't know what it is. They're OK, I guess."
MIKE: "If you had to go to prom with one, who'd you pick?"
ANNIE: "The guy on the right. He has better hair."
MIKE: "Dawson."
ANNIE: "Sure."
MIKE: "So why did you not pick the other guy?"
ANNIE: "He looks like he's in the middle of growing out a buzz, and that's not a good phase."
SWIPE LEFT? No on both
SCORE: 5/10 for Jackson, 6/10 for Van Der Beek
32.Zac Efron
WHO IS HE? He played Troy Bolton in the High School Musical series and also appeared in Hairspray and the comedy film 17 Again.
ANNIE: "Zac Efron. Oh my God. He's OK. But he looks like he's permanently holding in a sneeze. He looks like he's a very serious man who can't take a joke. He looks fine, but he gives me weird vibes."
SWIPE RIGHT? No.
SCORE: 7/10
33.Chad Michael Murray
WHO IS HE? He was all over teenagers' TVs thanks to One Tree Hill, Gilmore Girls, and Dawson's Creek.
ANNIE: "I always get him on my For You page on TikTok. He's chill. He's OK. He has a good smile. Rory fumbled."
SWIPE YES? Yes.
SCORE: 7.5/10
34.Jesse McCartney
WHO IS HE? The singer of the Top 10 hit "Leavin'" who also voiced Theodore in the Alvin and the Chipmunks movies.
ANNIE: "Ew, he's emo. I have no problem with emo guys, but this is just...no. He's scrawny but not in a good way."
MIKE: "There's a good way?"
ANNIE: "It's very in right now."
MIKE: "Like Timothée Chalamet?"
ANNIE: "Exactly. People like that kind of scrawny. But not this guy."
SWIPE RIGHT? No.
SCORE: 6/10
35.Orlando Bloom
WHO IS HE? A teen heartthrob thanks to playing Will Turner in the Pirates of the Caribbean film series.
ANNIE: "He's OK, I guess. His face is kind of squished. He's OK. But...no."
SWIPE RIGHT? No.
SCORE: 6/10
36.Taylor Lautner
WHO IS HE? He caught attention for his performances (sometimes shirtless) in the Twilight series, and for dating Taylor Swift.
ANNIE: "I don't see the hype that much. But it might be because his hair looks like I could buy it from Roblox. His face is good, though. Didn't he have long hair at one point? That was gross. I didn't like it."
SWIPE RIGHT? No.
SCORE: 7/10
37.Jake Gyllenhaal
WHO IS HE? A popular leading actor in big-budget fare, like The Day After Tomorrow, and critically-acclaimed films like Brokeback Mountain.
ANNIE: "Ugh, this guy. Oh brother. It might be that he's a villain in Spider-Man and 'All Too Well' is written about him, but I just don't like him in general."
MIKE: "Just go off the picture."
ANNIE: "Ok. He looks fine. But he looks like he would smell weird. Without the beard he'd look like Hans from Frozen."
SWIPE RIGHT? No.
SCORE: 6/10
38.Ryan Gosling
WHO IS HE? To '00s kids, he was one thing and one thing only: Noah in The Notebook.
ANNIE: "OK, I know he's funny, but I don't get the hype. If he has longer hair, it's chill. And if he's not bearded up, it's chill."
MIKE: "What does chill mean?"
ANNIE: "Like I'm not mad about it. But in this photo he has short hair and a beard. Not a fan."
SWIPE RIGHT? Yes.
SCORE: 7/10
39.Nick Cannon
WHO IS HE? A rapper and popular actor in teen faves like Drumline.
ANNIE: "He looks chill. I'd be OK with it. But I feel like he would try to be too nonchalant. He looks so nonchalant in this picture. But he's buff and has a good jawline."
SWIPE RIGHT? Yes.
SCORE: 8/10
40.Bow Wow
WHO IS HE? He released his debut rap album at just 13, and it went double platinum. He also starred in movies such as Like Mike.
ANNIE: "He's OK. He looks nice but not super good. He doesn't have an appeal. He's a good-looking guy, but he doesn't stick out."
SWIPE RIGHT? No.
SCORE: 7/10
41.Jesse Metcalfe
WHO IS HE? He starred in John Tucker Must Die and played John Rowland on Desperate Housewives.
ANNIE: "Those eyebrows! I don't like him. His eyebrows are too thick."
SWIPE RIGHT? No.
SCORE: 5/10
42.Adam Brody
WHO IS HE? The affable lead of the hit teen drama The O.C.
ANNIE: "I know this guy! He used to be in Gilmore Girls. I'm chill with him, but he looks like he'd be in the same room with Michael Cera. They give me awkward vibes. I think he's chill, though."
SWIPE RIGHT? Yes.
SCORE: 7/10
43.Chris Carmack
WHO IS HE? The star of the popular '00s shows The O.C. and Nashville.
ANNIE: "He looks like he'd be Australian. He's OK. I don't know. His hair isn't proportionate to his face. Like, his jawline is too much."
SWIPE RIGHT? No.
SCORE: 7/10
44.Robert Pattinson
WHO IS HE? The lead vampire in the Twilight series.
ANNIE: "I don't see the hype on this guy. Like, in Harry Potter he's chill, but he looks weird in everything else I've seen him in. In this photo, why are you looking at me like that? He looks devious!"
SWIPE RIGHT? No.
SCORE: 6/10
MIKE: "That's the last one!"
ANNIE: "Wow! I feel like I dissed so many people. I was a hater!"
Annie's top 10
1. Patrick Swayze
2. Usher
3. River Phoenix
4. Nick Cannon
5. Jonathan Taylor Thomas
6. Ethan Hawke
7. Heath Ledger
8. Ralph Macchio
9. Chad Michael Murray
10. Michael Schoeffling
