America's never had a first gentleman. Doug Emhoff could play 'a crucial role in reshaping the perception of masculinity,' experts say.
The United States has never before had a female president, and we’ve never had a first gentleman either. If Kamala Harris wins the presidential election this November, that means both of these firsts will be realized; with Harris as president, her husband, Doug Emhoff, would be the country’s first-ever first gentleman. Were that to happen, many experts say it could be an opportunity to mold contemporary perceptions of masculinity. It also casts into sharp relief different takes on masculinity being showcased at the top of U.S. politics.
“Trump's ‘gladiator’ image versus the ‘coach" or ‘girl dad’ persona embraced by Tim Walz and Emhoff illustrate the broader cultural crossroads at which the nation stands,” explains Richard Reeves, president of the American Institute for Boys and Men and author of Of Boys and Men: Why the Modern Male Is Struggling, Why It Matters, and What to Do about It. “Emhoff can in some ways be a model for men navigating a new world of much greater gender equality."
At the Democratic and Republican National Conventions, these different takes on masculinity were pronounced. At the RNC, former President Donald Trump pointedly entered to the song “It’s a Man’s Man’s Man's World.” At the DNC, Emhoff and many other notable men on the big stage — former President Barack Obama and vice presidential nominee Tim Walz among them — spoke about how proud they are of their wives.
“Trump and Vance themselves embody a very traditional masculinity — as do the professional wrestlers and other macho figures who were showcased at the GOP convention,” Katherine Jellison, professor of U.S. women’s and gender history at Ohio University, tells Yahoo Life. But she notes that Emhoff’s take on masculinity might in fact be closer to what many Americans connect with in 2024. “There are many Doug Emhoff ‘types,’" she says. “I think he may be a very relatable figure to a number of U.S. voters.”
A flip side to that coin is toxic masculinity. “Toxic masculinity is rooted in the idea that to be manly, men must appear strong, avoid being associated with anything that seems ‘feminine' and seek out power and status above all else,” explains Amy Diehl, gender equity researcher and author of Glass Walls.
Emhoff’s “type,” in contrast, has been defined by many as a “nice guy” or a “wife guy:” A man who is unapologetically supportive of his wife and a vocal advocate for equal women’s rights and freedoms. As second gentleman, Emhoff has leaned into those labels. When his wife became vice president, he left his practice as an entertainment lawyer and now teaches law part time at Georgetown University.
“I think Doug is representative of most men in America right now, many of whom are being out-earned by their wives, and have to figure out how to navigate a newer, more modern form of masculinity,” says Liz Plank, a journalist and the author of the bestselling For the Love of Men: A New Vision for Mindful Masculinity. “I don't think it's a soft kind of masculinity, I think it's a human kind of masculinity, rooted in mutual respect and admiration for the women they're in partnership with.”
According to Reeves, “this type of masculinity is vastly different from what we’ve collectively witnessed in the past" — especially in politics.
"Historically, masculinity in American politics has been characterized by a focus on toughness, resilience and a certain rugged individualism," Reeves says. "Figures like Teddy Roosevelt, with his emphasis on the ‘strenuous life,’ set the tone for a political culture that valued physical and moral strength above all. There's a new opportunity now to combine some of the strengths associated with traditional masculinity with a broader vision of human flourishing, and with an embrace of women's equality.”
Plank adds, “We have a chance to see a man in a supportive role for the most important job in the world. And we can't underestimate the power of that representation.”
Having a first gentleman — regardless of party affiliation — would be significant. But spouses haven't always been so visible in the few recent instances of women running for president. During Nikki Haley’s run for president, her husband Michael, a major in the South Carolina Army National Guard (and former first gentleman of that state), was deployed in Africa and thus not front and center on the stage. Conversely, when Hillary Clinton ran for president, many felt that her husband, former President Bill Clinton, wasn’t quite able to put her campaign before his legacy. “With Bill Clinton, it was sometimes difficult for him to cede the spotlight to his wife,” explains Jellison. “Bill Clinton sometimes spoke out of turn, forgetting that he was not the candidate.”
As first gentleman, Emhoff would have the opportunity to upend stereotypes in more socially oriented ways as well. “There are so many White House social and ceremonial traditions that the first lady usually oversees,” notes Diehl. “Decorating and hosting parties are duties that disproportionately fall to women in everyday life. But people of any gender can do these things!”
All that said, there are elements of Emhoff’s persona that appeal to traditional gender norms as well. “Doug is a dude first, which I think is actually important in terms of reaching men,” says Plank. “He doesn't put his masculinity aside in order to support a woman; it's part of his definition of it. He talks about fantasy football and trying to get the girl (who just so happens to be Kamala Harris), which is extremely relatable for a man watching at home.”
“If Kamala Harris is elected president, Doug Emhoff has a crucial role in reshaping the perception of masculinity in the highest echelons of American power,” says Reeves. “From a powerful public position, Emhoff could model a form of masculinity that is collaborative, empathetic and deeply involved in family life. A masculinity focused more on service than self.”