Ryan Sutter Made Vague Social Media Post About Trista to Show Her How Much He Missed Her: 'Blew Up in My Face'

The former 'Bachelorette' contestant said on the June 17 episode of 'The Most Dramatic Podcast Ever' he wanted his wife to see 'what happened while you were gone'

<p>Bennett Raglin/WireImage</p> Ryan and Trista Sutter attend the

Bennett Raglin/WireImage

Ryan and Trista Sutter attend the 'Marriage Boot Camp: Reality Stars' event at Catch Rooftop in N.Y.C. in 2014
  • Ambiguous May Instagram posts from Ryan Sutter led followers to think that his wife Trista Sutter died, or that their marriage hit a rough patch

  • Ryan called the assumptions “nuts” on the June 17 episode of The Most Dramatic Podcast Ever with Chris Harrison

  • The reality star told the former Bachelor host that he made those posts to show Trista “here's what happened while you were gone”

Ryan Sutter only had the best intentions when he posted on Instagram last month about missing his wife Trista Sutter.

Unfortunately, the vagueness of his May 12 and May 17 Instagram posts — in which Ryan, 49, mentioned how he wished Trista, 51, could be with their family for Mother's Day, how he wanted to could hear Trista’s voice and how he knew she needed time away to “discover yourself again” — led followers to suspect that the former Bachelorette had died or that the couple hit a snag in their marriage.

“The intent was, Trista wasn't gonna be able to have access to social media until she got finished with this experience she was on, so I was gonna post these things knowing, like, the second she had access to it, she would look at it, and she could see, like, here's the here's what happened while you were gone,” Ryan explained on the June 17 episode of The Most Dramatic Podcast Ever with Chris Harrison. “Here's how much we missed you. Here's how much, you know, how important you are to us, all this sort of stuff.”

Related: Ryan Sutter Reflects on 'Attention' His Cryptic Mother’s Day Post Received: ‘All Because I Missed My Wife’

Unfortunately, Ryan realized, “it just blew up in my face and backfired” and said he found the response "nuts."

After the social media stir, Ryan clarified in a May 18 Instagram post that “Trista is fine” and “we are fine.”

“We’re great,” the father of two continued. “Trista is at a place in life where she is searching a bit. An opportunity presented itself that may help her on that quest. With her family’s support, she has taken it. Part of that process means that she is temporarily inaccessible to us. I miss her. We miss her.”

The reality star also apologized for causing any alarm. “I write my feelings without regard for how they will be interpreted and with absolutely no intent to deceive or mislead anyone - that is the farthest thing from my mind,” Ryan wrote.

While speaking to Harrison, 52, Ryan expressed a similar sentiment.

“The intent is not to be like, ‘Hey, I'm gonna throw this out here and make people wonder if my wife's alive,’” the former Bachelorette contestant said. ‘You know, that's not what I'm going.”

Harrison called Ryan "a great writer" and said knew Ryan be someone who expressed himself on social media.

"So when I read your thing, I said, 'Yeah, it's kind of over the top and melodramatic. That's Ryan,'" the ex-Bachelor host continued, adding that commenters "don't know what he's talking about."

<p>Amy Sussman/Getty</p> Chris Harrison at the 49th Daytime Emmy Awards at Pasadena Convention Center in June 2022 in Pasadena, Calif.

Amy Sussman/Getty

Chris Harrison at the 49th Daytime Emmy Awards at Pasadena Convention Center in June 2022 in Pasadena, Calif.

On May 21, Ryan wrote on Instagram about how he mostly posts about his dog on social media and joked that he “strayed from the safety of the usual dog theme” with that initial post about Trista.

“She understood the context and so did I,” Ryan wrote. “No one else did however, and that’s where things went sideways. It was suggested that Trista had died, we were in trouble or that it must be a mid life crisis among many other creative ideas. Some thought I was intentionally misleading people in order to somehow benefit from it? It got picked up on entertainment news sites and I started getting texts from friends asking if I was ok. All because I missed my wife and chose to share how that felt.”

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Ryan admitted that it “felt good to know people still cared, and worried and wondered” about him and his wife 21 years after their Bachelorette appearance.

“It felt good to be noticed and inspired me to do better at paying attention to others - when they do good or when they need help,” he added. “In the end, like most things, everything turned out ok.”

He added to Harrison on the June 17 episode of The Most Dramatic Podcast, "The second you think no one's paying attention to you and, like, something like that happens.

When Trista regained access to her social media accounts on May 25, she made a joke about all the social media confusion.

“Can’t a girl have a nervous breakdown/trial separation/midlife crisis/death/divorce in peace around here?! 😜🤣” she wrote on Instagram. “In all seriousness, for those concerned, I’m safe and sound, happy and healthy, in love and grateful. 🥰. For those who’d rather focus on being critical and searching way too hard for darkness, good luck with that. 🙃”

Related: Trista Sutter Breaks Her Silence After Husband Ryan's Cryptic Posts: I'm 'Happy and Healthy'

Trista explained that she’d been given “an opportunity for perspective and personal growth” that she took “with the unconditional support of my family and friend,” and she defended Ryan’s write to privacy.

“He doesn’t owe anyone any explanation or require permission to post what he wants to post and share what he wants to share 💯,” she wrote. “If you want to know the rest of the story, I will share in due time.”

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