Yahoo Lifestyle The joy of solo travel
"I think every woman should take some time to themselves to recharge and see what they're capable of," says Tracey Spicer. Photo: Jeremy Park
I used to travel a lot solo when I was in my 20s.
I backpacked all over the world, so I felt confident travelling alone. But ever since I’ve had my kids, Taj, 10, and Grace, 8, I haven’t felt like I should be away from them. Call it working mother’s guilt if you want.
So when I got a call out of the blue from Sharing Bali (sharingbali.com), which runs retreats designed especially for women, asking if I’d like to come away on a health retreat, my first instinct was to say no and, to be honest, it took me quite some time to agree. I spoke to a friend, saying “Look, I can’t leave the kids and it’s the wrong thing to do, being away from them for that long”. My friend just responded “Are you insane? Go”. I then realised just how insane I was being. Sometimes you get caught up in your own mind, and you can’t get out of it until someone else shakes you out.
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I felt so guilty getting on the plane and I assumed that something would go wrong, which is ridiculous because I have a wonderful husband who is a 50-50 parent. I kept trying to call them in the car from the airport to the retreat, but then once I got there I was so happy I’d decided to come, I really was.
Sometimes you have to get out of your own environment to figure out that, hang on, I need this space for myself, somewhere away from the people who depend upon me. For me, it was being in such a remote place by myself
as well as talking to the other women and recognising we’re all in the same boat - many hadn’t been away from their kids before either.
The best thing about the retreat was having so much fun. It was a feeling of complete freedom. We were throwing coconuts to each other, we had mad races up and down hills.We went on a 25km bike ride, meeting locals and taking in beautiful scenery. Because it was fun, it didn’t even feel like exercise.
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One day we even climbed an active volcano, something I never, ever imagined I would do. We set off at 2am and finished at 10am. It was spooky at the start but the one upside was that we couldn’t see how steep it was! There were some bits we physically had to help each other up, which was lovely, and I just enjoyed the whole experience. When we got to the top, there was a group of local guys cooking eggs in the vents of the volcano - they would just pop the eggs in there for a few minutes then bring them out when they were hard boiled. Beats cooking it yourself! They also brewed coffee for us and, when the clouds lifted and we saw how far we’d climbed, we all jumped up and down and started squealing. It was wonderful.
As if that experience wasn’t amazing enough, when we got back down to the bottom we jumped into some natural hot springs, which were just stunning. But far from being tired, a couple of us felt like we could do it all over again. We felt so invigorated and strong, and had such faith in what our bodies could do. It proved once and for all how hard I can work.
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I think every woman should take some time to themselves to recharge and see what they’re capable of. It’s incredibly important because it rebuilds your confidence. Women so often sacrifice ourselves to others, whether that’s children or ageing parents or partners, and we so often think about ourselves last. One of the most valuable things about solo travel is that you just think about your own enjoyment and satisfaction, whether that’s for one week or even just one day. You also feel really strong, and that’s something I didn’t necessarily expect to take away from a holiday in Bali.
It also totally changed the way I look at exercise. I learnt not to view it as something you have to do, instead I look at it as moving your body in as many different ways as possible. Now, I often go for hikes on the weekend, instead of just hitting the treadmill.
Of course my kids missed me, and I missed them. But they thought it was the coolest thing ever their mum had scaled an active volcano. And you know what? It is pretty damn cool.
