To truly be strong you need to know when to let yourself be vulnerable and now is that time. I’ve had a testing week. I’d love to say that single life is a flurry of hot sex and fun encounters, well it is, BUT it’s also a life of feeling lonely.
This week I felt lonely for the first time in a year. I started doubting and analysing myself and questioned when I would find the right guy. But why bother yourself with the unknown? There is no viable way of anyone answering that question, so why am I even letting it bother me?
The answer to that is simple. It’s because I’m ready to love again. So, where is he? I thought he was just going to appear when I clicked my fingers. But these things take time and because of the heartache I went through, the screening process is a little bit more ruthless. To be honest I’m also sabotaging some opportunities before they’ve even blossomed because I can see that down the track, I might get hurt.
Feeling lonely doesn’t mean I need a man to complete me and that I can’t live a fulfilled happy life without one. Feeling lonely means that you want to share your vulnerable moments with someone, to feel safe in someone’s arms, and know that after a tough day there is a hug there waiting for you if you need it. To keep you company when your own company isn’t enough in that moment. That’s what I miss and that’s what I needed this week… not a dick pic.
I love doing my weekly dating column for Be because I know that when we share our experiences, it helps the whole sisterhood with their situations, it helps us understand and normalise things.
I always keep it real, raw and honest and that’s what you’re getting this week. A girl who struggled through being a singleton - and I know there is someone in the same position right now, and to you I say: “We’ve got this”.
It’s ok to be vulnerable but only if you understand why, and only if you shake away those negative vibes and pick yourself up and keep on going. Talk to your girlfriends about it BUT definitely don’t go to a bar and crumble into a stranger’s arms screaming “Why won’t you love me?" Defs not a good idea, and neither is drunk texting #guilty #takeawaymyphone.
Dating is hard. Love is hard. But in the end when you can feel that unconditional love, it will all be worth it. I know the journey can be hard but you need to trust it. Learn along the way, take the experiences good and bad, because when they finally come along you would have already made the mistakes and you’re ready to give it your all.
My final bit of advice is to take some time off from social media. It’s not real. All you see on Instagram is the perfect and flawless lives of everyone, you don’t see the flaws #guilty.
Don’t for a second think that you need a six pack or thigh gap to snag your dream guy - BUT you do need to be happy and healthy within yourself, so it’s only positive vibes when they come along. Just like some shampoo or make-up company said “You’re worth it” so don’t ever doubt yourself. Be vulnerable but show strength and know your worth.