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Mel Greig: This was confiscated from my luggage twice!

I am actually mortified now that I know why this has been happening to me, I cringe when I think about how awkward and embarrassing this is.

Over the past three years, I have had two um… lady pleasure items similar to an electric toothbrush, but not designed for your mouth… confiscated from my suitcase.

Other times I’ve also noticed that they aren’t in the same place that I packed them but at the time I didn’t think anything of it.

But I guess it turns out that there is a particular way you need to travel with vibrators.

I’ve had two ‘lady pleasure items’ confiscated from my luggage on TWO different occasions. Source: Getty | Mel Greig
I’ve had two ‘lady pleasure items’ confiscated from my luggage on TWO different occasions. Source: Getty | Mel Greig

The first time I had one confiscated I thought that it was probably because it looked like a weapon, it was this huge ridiculous one with studs all over it – a present and a joke from a hens show in Las Vegas.

I packed it in my luggage thinking nothing of it and how hilarious it would be to pass it on as a silly gift to someone else.

Only when I landed back in Australia, a card had been left in my suitcase saying an item had been confiscated. I assumed that the giant throbber was a risk to others, certainly a risk to my lady parts, god knows why anyone would even use that for pleasure – I certainly had no intention.

A year later I went to Hawaii and when I arrived back, I noticed that my special friend was missing once again.

This one was a nice normal non-weapon looking type, so I assumed I’d left it behind not realising that once again it had been confiscated.

My vibrators were mysteriously going missing and I couldn’t work out why. Source: Getty
My vibrators were mysteriously going missing and I couldn’t work out why. Source: Getty

On a recent interstate trip, I noticed that the batteries had been removed from my power stick and it had been wrapped up in a t-shirt… what the actual hell is going on?

So then came a google search followed by a wave of embarrassment as I found a site titled, ‘How to fly with a sex toy’.

“Keep your sex toy secure and remove the batteries, it could be considered dangerous if it is accidentally switched on during transit,” it read. Meanwhile, I’m legit dying right now.

My face when I found out there was protocol for flying with vibrators. Source: Instagram/ Mel Greig
My face when I found out there was protocol for flying with vibrators. Source: Instagram/ Mel Greig

For over 10 years my power sticks have been manhandled and tested, sooo cringe. How did I not know this?

There’s even a seminar you can watch on how to travel safely with sex toys. I feel like some kind of sexual criminal for wanting some self-love on holiday.

I was aware of ‘do you have any spare batteries in your luggage?’ I mean we are asked that every time we check in, but I always saw the ones in my device as secure – little did I consider that if it wasn’t packed properly it could accidentally switch on and cause havoc.

I’m not the only one this has happened to though and I wonder how many more women this has happened to.

Now I find myself wondering how many more women this has happened to. Source: Instagram/ Mel Greig
Now I find myself wondering how many more women this has happened to. Source: Instagram/ Mel Greig

In October 2011, writer and attorney Jill Filipovic was on an international flight from Newark, NJ to Dublin, Ireland, and upon arrival found a printed advisory from the TSA (Transportation Security Administration) in her checked bag stating it had been opened and inspected.

In the margin of the note, a TSA screener added an extra message saying, “Get your freak on girl.” The checked bag had contained a sex toy, and presumably, the message was related to the presence of that device.

So here I am, flying to Bali in two days and I’m going to need a full disguise to hide my shame for being the “dildo girl”. I apologise to the staff that just wanted a normal day at work but instead had to manhandle my pleasure tools… safe to say she’ll never be coming on holiday again.

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