Yahoo Lifestyle The Sexed-Up Side Of Social Networks
"I feel sexy for the first time in two years"
Kelly, 36, runs a small business. She's been divorced for two years.
Hot body," read the first comment. "You can't be in your 30s," said the next one. Only minutes earlier, I'd posted my first X-rated selfie to Fuckbook and, as I watched, strangers began to post glowing compliments underneath. With every post I felt more confident. For the first time since my divorce two years ago I felt sexy again.
I first stumbled upon Fuckbook - an erotic version of Facebook - six months after my divorce and I was immediately intrigued. While you can chat and "friend" people like on Facebook, the photos and conversation are flirtatious, sexy and downright dirty. Compared to the dating websites I'd been on, I loved how open people were about sex and their bodies.
Being newly single, I wasn't ready for dating or casual hook-ups. But Fuckbook offered the possibility of flirtation and anonymous fun, all without having to meet strangers in bars.
It felt odd setting up the camera for my first erotic selfie, but I had the perfect outfit - a red corset I'd last worn on my honeymoon. Striking a sultry pose with my cleavage popping and a hand slipping tantalisingly down my body, I took the shot and posted it to the website before I could have second thoughts. Any worries I might have had about a lack of appreciation vanished as strangers complimented my body.
That was 18 months ago and since then, I've posted hundreds of photos and sexy status updates. I log in every day and plan each photo, perfecting a position or finding a new angle. I've learnt to show my body off to its absolute best.
Sometimes, I'll post raunchy status updates with the intention of sparking a conversation with others on the site - and often these chats lead to both parties pleasuring themselves. Masturbation is nothing to be ashamed of and, in fact, I've discovered it's more enjoyable to have online company.
Having gone through a divorce, and with two young children, posting on Fuckbook - and receiving compliments in return - has made me feel desirable again. Being a single mum doesn't mean my sexual urges have disappeared - only now I have an outlet for them.
But that hasn't been the only benefit. When I joined the site I expected the experience to feel emotionless and anonymous, but as time's gone on, I've met other women who I've connected with. Perhaps it's the no-holds-barred photos or the sense that we all share the same secret, but I've found I can talk more openly and honestly on Fuckbook than on any other social media. We talk about divorce, dating disasters, or just about our everyday lives and work. I've formed genuine male friendships, too - again, something I never expected from an erotic website.
So far, I've only told three close girlfriends about Fuckbook. They had a bit of a giggle and once they understood what the site was about, they loved the naughtiness of it.
Occasionally, online flirtations have spilled over into real life and I've met up with one man from the site, but I'm still not ready to date properly. For me, Fuckbook is primarily about feeling empowered and liberated. I don't think it's an exaggeration to say Fuckbook has changed my life.
"3000 people see me naked every day"
Estrella, 25, is a personal assistant at a software company. She's been with her boyfriend for two years.
My boyfriend *Jake and I have always had an adventurous sex life. We love watching porn together, having sex outdoors, even swinging, so I was intrigued when he first told me about Uplust. Logging on to the site, which is an X-rated version of Instagram, we were soon scrolling through images with hashtags like "amateur", "blowjob" and "pussy". Straightaway I found the mix of real men and women really exciting.
Wanting to surprise Jake, that week I signed up for my own account. My first photo was of me standing in the bath, facing the wall, with my back to the camera. My hair was wet and clung to my naked back, and I held my arms up against the wall and pushed my bottom out.
I was so nervous, but excited, too, and even more so when strangers started liking it within minutes of posting. By the time I showed it to Jake that evening, more than 50 people had clicked on my photo - some had commented on it and others had started following my profile. Jake found the whole thing really horny; knowing that other men wanted me drove him wild. As I re-created the pose for Jake in real life we were both so turned on, and even then I sensed Uplust would become a regular feature of our sex life.
I've been using Uplust for almost a year now. Some of the images I post are soft and suggestive; my legs clad in sexy stockings or a necklace trailing across my breasts. But others are much more explicit, such as photos of Jake and I having sex. Sometimes Jake is in the shot, and when he is it's usually just a certain part of his anatomy!
Of course, some of the comments made about my photos are a bit crude, but that's all part of the game and I'd never take it personally or get offended. It's funny more than anything and because I don't use the site for chatting with people, extreme comments are easy to ignore.
I know some people do use UpList to meet people for casual sex, but, for me, it's all about the photo. In fact, I only follow 39 profiles. I'd rather post pictures of myself than spend hours looking at all the images on the site. Having said that, Jake and I do sometimes scroll through photos of real girls on Uplust as part of our foreplay.
Today, using the site has become far more about me and for me. I used to be quite shy about my body, but as I gathered followers and my photos started appearing in the top-rated charts - meaning they're some of the most liked photos on the website my confidence skyrocketed. More than 3000 people now follow me - they like me and my body, even though I'm not exactly a model, and that can't help but make you feel good about your sexuality and yourself.
I think the women on the site are far more creative and sexy than men. They tease and excite with interesting photos of them with toys or in different positions, whereas men are more likely to take a boring shot of their penis. It's great that there are so many of us women online: it proves that porn isn't just for men; women love sex sites, too. I think it's great that Uplust makes it so easy for women to show that to the world.
"Using pinsex improved my marriage"
Diane*, 40, is married and works as an office manager.
After 15 years of marriage, things tend to get a bit stale in the bedroom. Same routine, same positions, same deeply unsexy thoughts about the washing and the kids when we're getting busy. Sex with my husband, Peter*, had, over time, become a "lights off" affair because I'd grown so self-conscious about my figure. I wasn't ashamed of my body, but after two children it looked very different compared to when Peter and I first met. The most I'd ever done to spice up our sex life was to buy some new bras, but that didn't really reignite the spark.
Confiding to a friend about our sex life, she said she had signed up for a few erotic social media websites. At first, I was shocked. I'd never even used the internet to look at porn - I didn't think the restrictions we'd set up for the kids would let me! But the more I thought about it, the more intrigued I became. If other women could do it, why couldn't I?
A week later, after spending an hour or so browsing online porn sites, I came across Pinsex, an erotic photo and video-sharing website. The social pinboard is like a smutty offshoot of Pinterest, allowing users to save, share, upload and browse adult content. As I already had a Pinterest account, I figured I'd get to grips with the format, and I soon got used to the totally different content! As I scrolled through both amateur and professional pics of women in lingerie and couples having sex, I felt my nipples harden and excitement building. For the first time in a long time I was properly aroused, and that night Peter couldn't understand what had happened to me - I practically attacked him as he walked through the door.
Over the next few months, whenever I had the house to myself, I'd grab the laptop and head to Pinsex, where I'd look at raunchy photos and videos, pinning whatever turned me on.
So many other women were on the site, which made it feel acceptable and less dirty. Even still, I initially kept my new hobby a secret from Peter. But as time went on my confidence grew and soon I posted a couple of amateur shots on my page. Stripping down to my underwear, I straddled a chair and sucked seductively on a finger.
Looking at the shot afterwards, even I was amazed. I looked sexy! People who viewed my page agreed, and so I mustered the courage to tell Peter. He was as excited as I'd been and relieved, too: with my new-found raunchiness he'd been worried I'd been having an affair!
After that, browsing Pinsex and posting on it together became a regular part of our sex lives. It has inspired us to try new things. Before Pinsex, we'd never used a vibrator together, and the idea of tying Peter to the bed would have made me baulk. Joining Pinsex has made me realise that sex doesn't have to be boring. And it's not just our sex life that's improved - we talk much more now, and if there's something that's bothering me I'm less likely to bottle it up. I think I've become more open as a person.
We're now on various other websites like YouPorn, but for both Peter and I, it's the amateur pictures and videos we like most. For me, it's refreshing to know that men don't necessarily want to have sex with, or visualise, some model with endless legs. Curves and breasts - of any size - and a "normal" body are what turn them on. These days, knowing all that, I'm far happier to have sex with all the lights on.
Not ready for social sex?
... then the new generation of sex tracking apps might be for you. Nipple, the brainchild of Italy-based Matteo Sarzana, lets you enter details after every, ahem, encounter, be it a kiss or full sex, along with the opportunity to rate the experience. You can even earn Nipple points: the raunchier the moves you make, the more you rack up. "People are starting to see sex for what it is - a natural, safe and entertaining habit. Why should you be shy about it?" says Sarzana.
All the information fed into the app contributes to a global statistics page, where users can find "essential" information, like the preferred position of the day. At the moment the most popular one is missionary - in bed!
For a little more privacy, there's Spreadsheets, an app that monitors movement and audio levels to give you a statistical analysis of your performance between the sheets. This is one piece of technology that casts the notion of "personal best" in a whole new light ...
RELATED:
The rise of single women going online for sex
