Yahoo Lifestyle How To Deal With A Confidence Crisis
Tracey Spicer, journalist
"I remember the day vividly. I was 23 years old and had just landed my first job in metropolitan TV. I was a hard news reporter, but the weather presenter had fallen ill and I was asked to fill in. I was about 10 seconds into the piece when I realised, 'Oh my God, I'm going to faint in front of a quarter of a million viewers.' I figured it would be less embarrassing to walk away, so I looked to camera and said, 'Excuse me, I have to go now,' and then slumped in the corner of the studio watched on by horrified news presenters. That night, over spaghetti carbonara and a bottle of wine at a friend's house, I sobbed, 'That's it ... I think my career's over.'
"But a few days later I received a lovely call from my boss encouraging me to try again. Unbelievably, I passed out on air a second time! At this stage, I was feeling crushed. Incredibly, this event turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to my career. Our head of news realised after such a disaster, nothing could shock me so she promoted me to full-time newsreader in Brisbane. The whole experience taught me that no matter what happens in your career, you can bounce back - you just have to have faith in yourself."
Gracie Otto, filmmaker
"I was in London shooting my first documentary, The Last Impresario, when I had a mild panic attack. I was in my hotel room, arranging interviews, when my heart started beating faster and I had the sensation that the walls were closing in. I found myself thinking, 'What was I doing?' I was 22, and in London shooting a film on a borrowed camera. I felt out of my depth. I managed to calm down, recalling Mum's advice to take a deep breath, to give things a go.
"But my nerves struck again. I was shooting the same documentary - this time in New York - and I was due to interview Yoko Ono. We met at a gallery and as we sat down and the camera started rolling, my mind began racing. I kept thinking: 'Is my camera focused? Am I asking the right questions?' We were well into the interview when I realised Yoko sounded nervous herself. It was a valuable lesson. Everyone gets nervous. Ironically, that documentary shoot is now a source of strength. When I'm feeling anxious, I remind myself - I still managed to pull it off."
Jane Caro, social commentator
"In my 20s I wore a very convincing mask. On the outside, I was confident and had a great job as a copywriter in an ad agency, but on the inside I was hopelessly anxious - always believing the worst was going to happen.
"Of course, it never did ... until Polly, my first daughter, was born. She was premature and, shortly after her birth, picked up a serious bacterial infection and nearly died. I remember cradling her tiny frame, shaking with fear as she stopped breathing in my arms. I thought I was going to lose her.
"The next morning I met up with a grief counsellor who said, 'Jane, there's nothing special about you and there is nothing special about Polly. Terrible things can happen to anyone.' Basically he was saying, 'It's not your fault, and you can't control it.' It was such a powerful moment. The worst thing was happening, I couldn't control it, I had to let it go. My little girl recovered and, interestingly, I became quite a pragmatic, hands-off kind of parent. My confidence as a mum came from learning to relax, keeping a sense of humour, and from allowing my children to be who they were, and in turn not losing my sense of self. This is why when the girls were young I worked part-time, hired babysitters and was determined to have fun. One of my girls said to me recently, "Mum, you gave us a model to follow - you were not just a mother, you were a person."
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