Yahoo Lifestyle "She Thinks I’m Being Selfish": This Guy's Girlfriend Expects Him To Pay For Her Girls' Trip, And I'm Shocked At The Audacity
How people choose to handle finances in relationships is a personal decision. Maybe one partner pays for dinners out while another pays for experiences and activities. Whatever the situation is, that's between two people.
This boyfriend found himself in a situation regarding finances in his relationship, and he turned to the subreddit r/AITAH to ask if he was being an asshole to his girlfriend. Here's his story:
"Alright, Reddit, I (27M) need some outside perspective. My girlfriend, Sarah (25F), and I have been together for three years. Recently, I won a bet on Stake and ended up with a decent chunk of spare cash. Naturally, I was pretty stoked about it. Been thinking about putting it towards something fun or maybe even a small getaway for the two of us."
"But here’s the thing – Sarah found out about my winnings and now she wants me to pay for her upcoming girls' trip with her friends. Now, don’t get me wrong, I love Sarah and I want her to have fun with her friends. But I’m feeling kinda weird about using my winnings for something that doesn’t involve me at all.
I suggested that she could save up for her trip or maybe we could split the cost, but she wasn’t having any of it. She thinks I’m being selfish and that since we’re a couple, my money should be our money, especially since it was extra cash from a bet. I see her point, but I also feel like I earned it and should have a say in how it’s spent," the OP wrote.
Note: Some of this Reddit submission has been edited for length and/or clarity.
The OP continued by explaining, "Sarah’s friends are backing her up, saying I’m being a jerk for not wanting to support her. I’m starting to wonder if I’m in the wrong here. I do want her to have a good time, but I also don’t want to feel like I’m just a bank. So, AITA for not wanting to pay for my girlfriend’s girls' trip?"
Note: Some of this Reddit submission has been edited for length and/or clarity.
The comment section was filled with over 3k comments chiming in and sharing their thoughts on this OP's situation. One person pointed out that the girlfriend is revealing her true colors.
"NTA. Your GF is now showing her true colors. Stand your ground. Tell her that you had planned on using the money on a fun trip for you and her, but the way she is behaving now and her audacious entitlement make you want to not spend anything on her at all."
—u/TerrorAlpaca
This person had a very interesting take that I agree with.
"She said his money should be our money but: she wants to spend it exclusively for herself not split it between them, she not saying that her money is our money. So is op agreeing that he is the only one that shares his money? He’s being guilted and manipulated into 'seeing her point.' Gf is greedy and selfish."
—u/One-Possibility1178
Another person mentioned how the girlfriend's friends shouldn't be involved at all — which they shouldn't be!
"NTA. Dude, don’t get caught up in their manipulation tactics. The very ridiculous way your gf decided to pull her friends into your business is a huge put-off. Her friends aren’t a part of your relationship. They do not get to advocate for shit. Why does your gf have the impression that if you say no, all she needs to do is dig in and get her friends to harass you until you say yes? Your girlfriend is extremely immature, self-absorbed, and super entitled. Her friends are flying monkeys who can go pound sand. Don’t pay for her trip. She’s grown, she can finance it herself. You’re not married to her yet, and she’s pulling crap like this? Nope, on outta there.
You might be in a relationship; as a couple, you might share things, finances being one of them. However, forcing your partner and then trying to bully him and using your friends to do it with you is disgusting. This is a view into your future. Disagree on kids names? Get friends to bully you. Overspend on shopping? Get friends to bully you. Stop working for no good reason? Get friends to bully you. Want to spend time with your family? Get friends to bully you."
—u/Apprehensive_Pie4940
Lastly, this commenter pointed out that the OP has every right to do whatever he wants with his own money.
"No, man. It was your bet, and it was your risk. You could have easily lost as well. Now it's your money to do with as you like. Don't let people fool you into believing they own a part of your life just because they are in it."
—u/No_Role2325
What do you think? Do you think the girlfriend was in the wrong expecting her boyfriend to pay for her girls' trip? Do you think the boyfriend has every right to not want to pay for the girls' trip? Is there a right or wrong way of handling this situation? Share all your thoughts with me in the comments below!
