Groomsman shocked after 'trashy' request from groom: 'No heads up!'

·Lifestyle & Entertainment Producer
·3-min read

A groomsman has taken to Reddit's Am I The A**hole subreddit to find out if he's in the wrong after refusing a request of the groom on his wedding day.

The groomsman, 21, is the bride's brother and was asked to be part of the wedding party even though he doesn't know the groom, named Dave, very well. However, the poster thought it was a nice gesture so went along with it.

A groom with his groomsmen
A groomsman has asked the Internet if he's in the wrong for refusing a 'tacky' request by the groom. Photo: Getty

"So we’re in some park taking pictures before the ceremony and the photographer tells us that he wants a picture where the groomsmen have their pants around their ankles," he wrote. "I was very caught off guard by this, but Dave and the other groomsmen found it funny and dropped their pants right away. Now I’m not self-conscious about my body or anything (I’m an athlete, so I’m in decent shape), but I still find it awkward and embarrassing to be photographed with strangers in a public park in my underwear."

He continued, "I told them that I didn’t feel comfortable and I’d be happy to sit this one out (all of the rest of the groomsmen are Dave’s college buddies, so it’s not like a picture with just them would’ve been weird anyway), but they kept insisting. This went on for several minutes (Dave arguing with me with his pants around his ankles the entire time), and even my sister said I was making things difficult."

Eventually, the Reddit user "relented" and the group began teasing him, "They thought I was wearing tighty whities or something since I was so embarrassed (I was actually wearing boxers and the rest of them boxer briefs or briefs, so admittedly I did have the least revealing underwear there). It was just as uncomfortable as I imagined."

A groomsman
The groomsman was shocked by the request to drop his pants and other Reddit users were equally dumbfounded as to why they'd request him to do that without mentioning it earlier. Photo: Getty

The next day, that was the photo that was posted to social media by a number of the groomsmen involved.

"I didn’t really want a ton of family members and family friends seeing me in my underwear," he wrote. "Dave’s friend even commented 'this was the most difficult picture to take because someone decided to have a diva moment' and most of the groomsmen liked it."

He added that while it might have made more sense if all the boys were wearing the same underwear specifically for the wedding, it was "embarrassing" to have to drop his pants without "any heads up".

Commenters slammed the groom for forcing him into the pose, with was deemed as "tacky".

"NTA [Not the A**hole]," one user wrote. "You tried to set a reasonable boundary—seriously, who drops trou in a public park???—and they tromped all over it. I'm sorry you were pressured into doing something that made you so uncomfortable, and also sorry they teased you about it afterwards."

"Plus what a lame, trashy photo," another agreed. "What is the implication? What is the point? Why do you want a photo of dudes in their underwear?"

"NTA," someone else added. "Women wouldn’t be asked to do this…make that demanded. Men should be treated no differently. The moment you said you were uncomfortable should’ve been it."

"I felt vicariously uncomfortable just reading this post," a fourth wrote. "Definitely wouldn’t want to drop my pants in public for a photo either."

"NTA THEY were making things difficult," another wrote. "When you said you don't feel comfortable they should just have left it at that. They could've made their photo and everyone would have been happy."

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