Yahoo Lifestyle Every Woman's Medical Issue Is Not, Not, Nottttt An Overreaction, But These Unqualified Doctors Weirdly Believe So
Reddit user anonuser123999 asked the women of the community, "What has your experience been like being ignored or dismissed by doctors?"
Unfortunately, this has been a major problem for years. Too many doctors don't take a woman's medical issue seriously (especially male doctors), and simply refuse to give them a proper examination.
So, here are some women who were dismissed or ignored by doctors who deserved so, so much better:
Note: Some submissions include topics of mental illness and body-shaming. Please proceed with caution.
1."I asked a doctor to do a biopsy of a suspicious-looking spot. He looked at it and assured me it was nothing. I insisted, and he even made me re-book another appointment because he spent the entire appointment arguing with me, and there wasn’t enough time left for him to complete a biopsy. When I re-booked and went back for the biopsy, he told me it was a waste of resources as he was certain it was nothing. A different doctor from the same practice called me back a few days later and told me to come in immediately. The result? Malignant melanoma...at the age of 24. Always, always, always advocate for yourself, ladies."
2."I suffered from migraines that would last weeks at a time, and then finally hit me hard for about a week to the point that any kind of light hurt made me puke water up. For 15 years, every time I brought it up, they would say, 'Oh, it’s normal — it’s just your body. It can’t hurt that much — it’s just stress, and if you lost weight, you wouldn’t get migraines.' Then, one day, I got a new doctor, and I told her. She looked at me and said that’s not normal at all, and she had me do brain scans. It turns out that a part of my brain was super inflamed. She gave me medicine for three months, and the migraines pretty much disappeared. All it took was three months of medication. If the other doctors had taken me seriously, I wouldn’t have spent so much time in pain."
3."I went to the ER in an ambulance because I was screaming and crying in 10/10 pain for 72 hours with zero sleep. My face was raw from tears, and my lips were cracked from screaming. The medics had to carry me down the stairs, and I couldn't walk. The ER doctor gave me a steroid shot and sent me home with muscle relaxers. Guess who was back in the ER, not 24 hours later? The second time, my partner (male) was with me. I was triaged immediately, he advocated for me, and I was given morphine within five minutes. Then, an MRI was ordered, and I was offered emergency surgery. My doc RXD me a week of opiates and benzos to sleep. This was the most egregious stuff I've ever experienced in my life. Fuck that stupid-ass first doctor."
4."It took 15 years for me to be diagnosed with endometriosis. I went to an endometriosis 'specialist' who rolled her eyes and said she wasn't a 'back doctor' because I told her my cramps turned into back spasms, which is a really well-known endometriosis symptom. What kind of back doctor does she suggest? NO ONE. No referral — just an attitude of 'get the fuck out.' I changed my entire PhD to focus on endometriosis, and I started walking into an appointment with three things: a detailed history summary that I asked them to read in front of me, a stack of endometriosis research studies, and an attitude problem. With references, I was perfectly comfortable pointing out when their proposed way to get me out of the office contradicted the standard of care and would site all guidelines. I found an amazing doctor I wouldn’t trade for the world who allowed me to have a huge hand in my surgical plan. It felt great."
5."I insisted there was something wrong after I had contractions for two days straight. I had what I thought was a really watery discharge. The triage nurse wouldn't even let me see the midwives. She insisted it was just false labor. I came back after two more days of having constant contractions. She again insisted it was just false labor. She let me see the midwife at that time, who realized I had been leaking amniotic fluid for four days. My water broke on the floor 15 minutes later. I had sepsis and almost died."
6."When I had gallstones, I had to make a video visit because it was the middle of 2020, and that was all that was offered. The female doctor scolded me for not making a physical appointment because it would've been better to do a physical exam. Then she had the nerve to tell me it was probably 'just gas pains' that were leaving me in a cold sweat on the floor in the fetal position, trying not to breathe wrong and causing me to have the worst pain I've ever felt in my life. She begrudgingly wrote me an order for an ultrasound."
"I was an X-ray tech at the time (now an MRI tech) and was watching the screen while they scanned my gallbladder. Ultrasound is witchcraft to me, and it is super challenging to understand what I'm seeing, even with my imaging background. But even to me, it did not look like a nice clear fluid-filled sac like it was supposed to.
I compared what I saw to images on Radiopedia, and then, sure enough, the report came back saying my gallbladder was FULL of sludge and stones. I had that doctor yeeted a month later.
'Gas pains' 🙄🙄🙄."
7."In my mid-20s, I suddenly (like overnight) had large blue veins appear on my chest and, shortly after, developed varicose veins in both upper arms. I didn't have health insurance at the time, so I couldn't get it checked out. It wasn't painful — just strange and unsightly. I also developed Raynaud's in my hands. A few years later, when I finally had health insurance, I got into a minor car accident and sustained a concussion. The male doctor who checked me out dismissed the veins as 'just genetic' and didn't seem concerned. About two years later, I worked at a primary care office with all female doctors who were ALL concerned. They'd never seen anything like it, and my hands were permanently discolored from lack of blood flow. They could not figure it out, so they sent me to a male cardiologist."
"The male cardiologist was initially very kind and listened to me patiently, but his diagnosis was that I was just 'fat.' He said my arms were 'fat,' and that was probably causing the veins to show (much like a bodybuilder with muscular arms might have ropey veins).
But, just in case, he referred me to a female thoracic surgeon, who ordered an ultrasound to see if there were any clots.
The ultrasound showed no evidence of clots but did answer my question as to what was wrong with me. I have bilateral thoracic outlet syndrome."
8."It took me over six years to be diagnosed with fibromyalgia, six years of asking doctors why my entire body hurt every day and whether anything could be done about it. The most frustrating thing was I found out years later (by reading my medical records) that a rheumatologist had written on my chart that I might have fibro, like, two years into my having symptoms. But my GP never relayed that information to me and never referred me to chronic pain specialists until I did the research myself and practically forced her to."
9."I've always had issues with my back. I went to my doctor at 19. She didn't even want to see my back. She told me it's so modern for young people to have back issues, but I told her I suffered all my life and teachers tried to move me to taller tables, etc., and nothing worked. She said she would send my case to the hospital, and I would be called in for X-rays. I waited a whole year and realized she had never sent anything so I went back. She still didn't bother looking at my back but told me this time that I had a mental illness and was imagining the pain. I got angry and demanded those X-rays. She finally sent my case to the hospital."
"I was called in for X-rays. I'm born with a back that isn't straight. The day I got my results back, I went down to the commune and said I wanted a new doctor (that's how we do it here in Denmark.)
They handed me a list of doctors with openings for new patients, and I picked one. The lady behind the counter asked what was wrong with my current doctor since they had too many people switching from her.
So here I am at age 43. I've been with the house of doctors I chose back when I was 20. My first meeting with one of them, she asked to see my back. She told me that she could clearly see the issue just by me lifting my shirt. It really would have been that simple if the old doctor had bothered to look at my back."
10."Chronic pain? Must be a 'drug seeker.' Fatigued? Lifestyle change (when it actually has a medical basis). Insomnia? Try meditation. Anxious? Here, 'calm down,' there’s nothing wrong (it was actually thyroiditis). Feeling short of breath? Must be anxiety (I was already diagnosed with deep vein thrombosis — shock horror, the clots spread to my lungs). But no — I was clearly just 'emotional.'"
"My daughter is sadly experiencing the same thing — she's being put down just for identifying as a female. Palpitations? Clearly, because she’s a young woman (even with a close family history of sudden cardiac death). And yet, my son with palpitations was taken very seriously.
I was just having a conversation last night about how even female primary care doctors don’t seem to know much about menopause, prolapse, and other specific female issues.
I’m a female healthcare worker and am honestly shocked by how health professionals treat women."
11."I had a ruptured ovarian cyst but was told it was a 'breakthrough period.' I think I’d know a 'breakthrough period' after 20 years. They don’t result in blacking out in the fetal position on the bathroom floor..."
12."My whole life until May of this year, the doctors kept telling me I had GAD alongside my PTSD. I knew in my heart that I wasn't experiencing generalized anxiety disorder. I knew that something in my brain was off after years and years of telling people. I finally got referred to a psychiatrist who was able to diagnose me with AuDHD [autism spectrum disorder and attention deficit hyperactivity disorder]. But, yeah — I'm just 'anxious' 😡."
13."I've always been fairly fortunate when it comes to my feminine health. My cycle was 24 days, like clockwork, regular, with no struggles getting pregnant, the usual. In 2021, I gained 60 pounds despite exercising and eating the same. I was lethargic all of the time, and my period skipped for two months in a row. I assumed it was because of my age and maybe starting perimenopause early. But, instead, I had a period that was so heavy I was bleeding through an overnight pad and super heavy tampon every 20 minutes. Wearing tampons became painful, and I’d get cramps so bad I couldn’t feel my feet. I bled like this every day for six months while I pleaded with my doctor to run tests. I just kept getting told it was my weight."
"Finally, I got an ultrasound, and my doctor found a cyst on my right ovary. He decided I had polycystic ovary syndrome and put me on birth control with progesterone.
Four months later, I developed a pulmonary embolism and nearly died. After four years of begging for a second opinion, the ultrasound found that my uterine wall was even thicker than it was before, and there are over 30 cysts now.
A biopsy ruled out cancer, and I’m awaiting an endometrial ablation. To this day, I don’t know why this happened."
14."From the ages of eight to 14, my hip would pop out of place. Like, the femur head would pop out of the socket, and I'd have to pop it back in. It caused so much pain, and so many doctors told me there was nothing wrong and even told me that it was in my head. I tried seven rounds of physical therapy and acupuncture and went to a chiropractor. Nothing helped — eventually, I got cortisone shots, and those helped."
"After five years, I got referred to a special doctor. I don't remember what he was called, but he was like a chiropractor for muscles, and he found out that the reason my hip kept popping out was because the muscles inside of my joint holding my femur head in were extra stretchy.
He helped me until I hit puberty, and my hips expanded, which made the muscles kinda the right way.
Now my hips don't pop out, but sometimes they hurt, and I can tell if it's going to rain."
15."It was awful. It took years to figure out certain issues, and most of those I figured out on my own through Reddit (especially when it came to reproductive health). Women aren’t taken seriously, and unfortunately, often, even by other women in medical fields. Feeling dismissed or like your issue isn’t legitimate is terrible. Based on my own experiences (as well as my female and male friends' experiences), women face it significantly more."
16.And finally, "When I was 22, I noticed pain in my side and nausea. I lost my appetite, and I was pretty tired all the time. I went to my doctor and told him all my symptoms and concerns, and he said I needed to get better sleep and was probably constipated. Then he sent me home. This went on for a month, and I got so bad that I lost 18 lbs because I couldn’t eat. I kept passing out, I had intense pain in my side, and I ended up passing out on my children one night. They couldn’t wake me up. They ran and got their dad, who carried my unconscious body to the truck and then to the ER. I was severely dehydrated and unconscious, and they apparently did some imaging on me and found that my kidney was double in size, and I was dying."
"They pumped me full of meds and kept me until they watched it unswell. Eventually, I was sent home after being in the hospital for three days.
The first thing the doctor said to me was, 'Why didn’t you come in sooner — you would’ve been dead in another week?!' I not-so-politely reminded him that I did, in fact, come in about my issues, and he dismissed me for being constipated.
He said I didn’t make him aware of just how much pain I was in — I couldn’t believe him."
Note: Some submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.
If you're someone who identifies as a woman, what was your negative experience with a doctor who dismissed/ignored you? (This can include doctors, nurses, therapists, and anyone else in the medical field).
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