Brother slammed for missing sister's wedding to 'get drunk'

Kristine Tarbert
·Features and Health Editor
·4-min read

A man has been slammed online for wanting to skip his sister's wedding – which happens to also be his 21st birthday – to "get drunk" instead.

Taking to Reddit in a since deleted thread, the 20-year-old explained he had initially been given two months notice ahead of the big day, admitting at the time he didn't "really care" about the date clash.

woman and man argue
A man says he wants to skip his sister's wedding as it falls on his birthday. Photo: Getty

"I don't really care because I'm just assuming that's the only day they could have it," he wrote. "I told her I might not be there but I would try my best. She never really responded when I told her that.

"Now her wedding is next week. A couple of friends wanted to go out and drink to celebrate me turning 21. I've never drunk before so I honestly want to do that instead."

He asked users for their thoughts, adding he didn't think he would be the a**hole as he had told her in advance he "might not make it".

The thread quickly blew up, with the brother getting lashed in the comments for choosing to get drunk instead of going to his sister's wedding.

"Of course [you're the a**hole]! Not going to your siblings wedding so you can get drunk with friends? Especially because you said it was the only day they could have their wedding. You are not a good sibling," was one shocked response.

"Having your first legal drink at your sister's wedding is the kind of feel good story you can tell for years. Go out with your friends another night," another said.

"Drink at your sister's wedding. If you don't go [you're the a**hole]," another agreed.


There were a few people who tried to make the best out of a bad situation, suggesting he try and at least do both.

"A lot of people don’t hang around for the reception long anyways. Go to the wedding, stay at the reception for a little while to say hi to family members, then dip and do whatever with friends. Perfect compromise," was one response.

"Can't you go to the wedding and go out with friends later? Why do you have to choose one if you can arrange to do both?" another said.

Sad bride crying sitting on a sofa, smitten, pondering, feeling low and depressed
Some people thought the bride would be upset if he missed her wedding. Photo: Getty

However, unhappy with the mostly negative reaction, the original poster added an edit, linking out to another Reddit thread from last month, written by a different sibling that had a very similar dilemma.

"All the comments on that post contradicts everything said in this thread," he said about the other comments, which put the blame on the bride instead.

For some context, the other situation differed in a few key points. In this case the date chosen was NYE, which also happened to be that woman's 21st birthday.

But as nothing was yet booked and they were only in the planning stages, it seemed most people here thought the bride was definitely the one in the wrong.

Especially when the poster explained: "Neither my sister or her fiancé cares about NYE, which isn’t as big of a celebration as you might assume. She hasn’t planned any details. She saw an episode of Say Yes to the Dress that made her think a NYE wedding was cute."

Despite his efforts, the brother in this tale still received little sympathy.

"Well maybe you should have brought up that you had a problem with her doing it on your birthday two months ago instead of saying 'I’ll try and make it'," one person hit back. 

"I’d feel more inclined to call her an a**hole if you made it clear that you’re not ok with it being on your birthday than just saying idk if I’ll be able to make it. The way you went about it will just make it seem like you would rather get trashed than go to your sisters wedding."

Never miss a thing. Sign up to Yahoo Lifestyle’s daily newsletter.

Or if you have a story idea, email us at