People Are Sharing The Hilarious Everyday Activities That Would Earn Them Olympic Gold

Recently, I asked the BuzzFeed Community to share an everyday activity, trait, or skill they possess that could win gold if it were an Olympic game. The results had me mentally preparing for the ridiculous make-believe trials in four years:

1."I can pick out the perfect avocado. Every. Single. Time."

—c49a679543

2."Pissing people off. I just magically know the thing to do in any situation to piss people off. Often my mere presence is enough."

—certified_drapetomaniac

3."I’d win gold in the 'Guilty-Feeling-Mom' event."

—stylishmule854

4."For a night out: 'Speed-Getting-Ready.' I can be showered, hair done, and makeup done all within about 10 minutes!"

—joolzr2

5."I know the choreography to way too many K-Pop dances. If there was a dance cover content, I could contend with anyone on the planet."

—Anonymous, 19

6."Needing to wipe the least after taking a dump. It's an unreal gift. And yes, my butthole is clean. Squeaky cheeks!"

—sparklysalt40

7.My mom had surgery on her throat about 20 years ago that somehow completely removed her capacity to get brain freeze. She can inhale absolutely any frozen food or dessert and never have to worry about brain freeze. I've seen her do it. If eating ice cream fast was an Olympic sport, she'd be a 20-time Gold Medalist.

—libm

8."...procrastinating."

—Anonymous, 18

9."Conking out the second I get into a moving vehicle. Car, bus, plane, train—I can and usually nod off once I'm on. I also have the eerie ability to wake up one stop before my stop or a few minutes before arriving at my destination."

—ravenbard

10."This is going to come across as very unconventional and weird, and would probably not be considered a 'real' talent, but I can mimic the sound of a Novelty Noise Maker—those little tubes that make elevating sounds as you turn them upside-down."

—bj007

11."I play a mean version of hot cross buns on the recorder. On a good day, I could win gold."

—Anonymous, 37

12."Reading and eating."

—melody_taylorsversion

13."Random bits of trivia."

—visionarylion48

14."Sleeping."

—edgyduck28

15."Put me in, coach. I'm ready to defend my country's honor over my insane Bob's Burgers trivia knowledge."

—Anonymous, 28

16."I know every U.S. state and can name them all faster than anyone. If I had to fill out a map, I could do it in under two minutes."

—Anonymous, 41

17."I would for sure be the champion of arguing out of things that I don't want to do. You might as well hand over the gold medal now!"

—glitteryship583

18."If not giving a damn was an Olympic sport, I'd hold a record for gold medals won."

—Anonymous, 49

19."Predicting cliché plots after only reading or watching for ten minutes. I’ve read so much fan fiction and watched so many movies that I can see everything coming. It was funny and now it’s just sad."

—Anonymous, 16

20."Knowing a lot about death-related history and facts."

—coffinsandroses

21."My ability/game would be Backgammon. Few people know it exists, and not everyone who knows how to play knows how to win."

—Anonymous, 32

22."Eating an entire bag of Harvest Cheddar Sun Chips in one day...or crying over dumb stuff."

—grapeflavoredorange

23."I seriously could finish 5 TV series in a workweek. Marathon watching is a habit I'm trying to get out of, but working at home, it's easy to put something on while I work."

—Anonymous, 28

What would you win Olympic gold in? Comment below!