“I love the look of skinny jeans but I’m not ‘skinny’. How should I wear them?”

The darker the denim the better, says WH style editor Talia Maltz. “Tunic tops and blazers give the jean a more flattering legging look,” she says. “Opt for knee-high boots or heels or, if you’re going with flat shoes, choose ballet flats or light-coloured shoes to give the illusion of length to your legs.”

“How can I wear boyfriend jeans without looking like a slob?”

To keep it polished, watch what shoes you team with this look, says Maltz. “For the day, wear ballet flats or other dainty options; for night a great heel without ankle straps will give height and length to your legs. Choose a straight leg that you can roll up to sit just above the ankle, and opt for a fitted top to even things out.”

“When trying on jeans, should I go a size bigger and longer?”

Denim shrinks in length after a wash, and if it’s too tight across the hips the fabric will stretch and make the legs shorter, says Lichi. You can always get jeans taken up later, so go for longer to be safe. To keep length from creeping up too much after a wash, Laird says to smooth and stretch legs out before they’re fully dry.

“Can tight jeans give you thrush?”

Oh yes, thrush loves a warm, wet environment, says WH health expert, Dr Ginni Mansberg. “Tight jeans can stop the airflow to your vulva, and the natural consequence (if you have thrush lying dormant) is to throw it into overdrive,” she says. If you get an outbreak, step away from the jeans and into a skirt until the thrush has kissed your arse goodbye. So to speak.

“Will pockets on the back make my bum look bigger?”

It depends on what you’ve got going on back there. Says Maltz: “Pockets on the seat can make your bum appear smaller as the detail of the pocket draws attention away from the size of your behind. But keep it simple.” Maltz recommends medium-sized pockets, not overly detailed and placed in the centre of each cheek or slightly lower.

“Button or zip fly?”

We did some fly-swotting on this one, and it turns out zips aren’t just more convenient when you’re busting for a wee: “A zip fly is more comfortable, easier to use and is more flattering, as it holds the tummy in more smoothly,” says Joanna Lichi from Sew-Special clothing alterations. “Button flies are more of a fashion trend in the design. They add a more masculine look as well.”

“Is it true you can prolong the life of your jeans by keeping them in the freezer?”

Yes! To make your jeans last longer, particularly dark denim, you can increase the time between washes by storing ’em in your freezer. This kills bacteria and minimises odours, says General Pants Co. women’s denim buyer, Lauren Jones. “It’s also good for removing gum or other nasties.” Now that’s cool.

“How are acid wash jeans made? Do they really use acid?”

Ah, acid wash. One of those questionable ’80s trends that just keeps on coming back. We asked Michael Zerger-Daddow, Jeanswest denim manager, for an answer: “Pumice stones are soaked in bleach and left in the sun to dry,” he says. “The stones are then washed with the jeans, activating the bleach which leaves random marks.”